Mother and child starving while Deadbeat Dad parties on...

[mamasan]

Wisconsin
My ex husband lives in Kansas and was ordered to pay support back in 1995. Since then, he has only paid $300.00. He is $20,000 in arrears. He does not file income tax because it makes him mad that all his money will be intercepted.
The older 2 children from his previous relationships for whom he sometimes pays support are now 18 and 16. He owes the state of Texas for the 18 year old as the child's mother was previously on some type of assistance. His second wife, mother of the 16 year old is remarried and wealthy but still he has to pay back the state of Kansas for the time she was receiving assistance also. And then, there is my daughter who is 8 who receives nothing.
My child is on medical insurance through the state of Wisconsin so we have a worker to sort of represent us. I say sort of because she told me the other day that she has way too many case loads and that I should contact Kansas childsupport agency myself, that she would write a letter to them requesting that they deal directly with me.
Since the first child is 18, will the back owed money that he pays to Texas still take first priority? And, since the mother of his second child is wealthy now, is the money that he has to pay to the state of Kansas still going to take priortiy over my daughter? How long?
I work full time and as a single parent am really struggling just to get food on the table and a roof over our heads. I'm extremely frustrated because I know that he is living with his girlfriend and making more money than I do, living in a nice place, driving a nice car yet my daughter doesn't get a penny.
I don't even know how I'm going to get her school clothes and supplies. It seems to me that there is something terribly wrong with the system.
I would greatly appreciate any suggestions that those of you who read this might have.
Thankyou!

[Edited by mamasan on 07-02-2001 at 10:06 PM]

 

[p towle]

apply for c/s services. tell them to suspend his drivers lic to begin with.

 

[Toni777]

idea

Please contact me at [email protected]

I have some ideas, and some people you can contact that might be able to help you.

Thanks,

Toni

 

[mamasan]

Thanks for your reply. Toni777 I will contact you. I assume c/s means child support services. I already have a childsupport worker through the state of Wisconsin because my daughter has a medical assistance card. The case worker is the one who told me she has too much of a case load to help me. She has had my case for 2 years and has accomplished nothing. That's one of the reasons I'm so frustrated! I thought about going to her superiors but don't know if I'll get anywhere because I'm just a peon...just another case #.
I would LOVE to get his drivers license suspended but wouldn't even know how to go about it since my case worker won't do it. I feel stuck because I don't know if the state of Kansas will deal with me directly and if I have to depend on my caseworker...well....could be another 5 years!
I really wish I could afford an attorney because believe me, I'd have him on my ex's case like a fly on $#@%!
I'm still wanting to know what the time frame is for him paying back the 2 states..Texas and Kansas and when my daughter will be considered a priortiy when the money that will hopefully someday be garnished from his wages is being distributed. Also, I am the one who keeps my caseworker informed of his whereabouts. Otherwise, she wouldn't even open the dang file.
There must be something I can do!

 

[leigh36066]

I know exactly where you are coming from, my ex has refused to pay nor does he care to pay child support for the past 4 years. There has been an arrest warrant out for his arrest but it's still sitting on someones desk, i was told that unless he breaks the law then he will never get served, because they will not put out a manhunt for him, I told CS that I know where he lives and that he refuses to keep a job long especially if he can't get paid under the table. I am at my wits ends, and have come to the conclusion that he will always get away with not having to pay CS. I wish you the best of luck because I know what you are going thru. Good Luck and hope things work out for you.

 

[angryfather]

GOOD. You know what... most deadbeat dads are not deadbeat dads at all... I'm not saying that this is the fact in your case but YES the system IS messed up and it favors the MOTHER. you should get a new job or do something to make money for yourself instead of relying on this guy. don't get me wrong the guy sounds like scum but you can't get blood from a turnip. So get out there put a little determination in your step and find a job that will pay you what you need to raise your child. Live an upright life and teach your kids morals and values and show them (NOT TELL THEM) that you are a better person.

 

[Twilightfire24]

All I have to say is I undertand where you are coming from. I am 22, trying to go to school, work a full time job and take care of my child who will be turning 2. I don't know where you get off saying how easy it is. I am currently trying to pay off outstanding debt and support myself and my son. I couldn't do it without my mother. I couldn't afford to live by myself, and I am paid decently, I make more than my mom. Haven't heard from his DEADBEAT dad since Christmas... some reasoning I think it is a good thing, but other times I feel that I am stressing mysef out for nothing since it is his responsibility as well. I haven't gotten more than $10 dollars from him and this was back last year. The sad part was I asked for $20. I had to have my brother buy MY SON diapers. I just had to get my car fixed and now this puts me back for my car payment. Thats not right. He is out galavanting around doing whatever and not having a worry in his life. It isn't fair - Angryfather- what would you like me to do - go get a second job so that I do not have any quality time to spend with my son - so he doesnt know who his mother is either- just to get by???? Sorry not going to happen.... I have contacted the Florida Department of Revenue for Child Support and then they go to serve him and he isn't there or all the cars are in the driveway and they come back 10 minutes later and the cars are gone- then they go to his work and he got fired. Now I don't know where he is living - yet they have all of his information and his social - everything - but they tell me there isn't anything further they can do since I dont know where he is - I told them thats your job and hung up on them... thats the last time I spoke with them. It is one huge headache, I cannot afford to hire a lawyer, I don't know what to do. All I know is it isn't fair. Plus for Custody you need to bring him to court - well I am in an endless loop- if anyone has any suggestions let me know. It is greatly appreciated.

 

[henri]

YOU GO GIRL!

WELL, THANK YOU MISS MOTHER.

GET THE DEADBEAT FOR ALL YOU CAN! TOO MANY MEN THINK THEY CAN PLAY THE GAME AND NOT PAY THE PRICE. YOUR SON DESERVES TO BE SUPPORTED BY HIS FATHER. ALL OF THESE MEN SHOULD JUST KEEP IT IN THEIR PANTS IF THEY CANT AFFORD TO SUPPORT THEIR OFFSPRING UNTIL 18.