What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida / Washington
I'm trying to be as specific and detailed as I can the first time.
My ex Husband and I split in July 2015. No children together. I went to Washington State and he went to Florida. He still had an active Florida drivers licence while I did not have residency established in Washington, my home state yet, so I insisted he file for divorce in Florida ASAP. I provided him with the address of my grandparents that would forward directly to my impending and newly acquired apartment. I hadn't physically moved into my apartment yet at the time. In the month of September 2015 he was on the phone with me and disclosed how his VA benefits had been flagged and he was notified that he was under investigation by US ARMY CID. We are both veterans. I asked a bunch of questions about why, when how etc and he said that I just shouldn't speak to any police that come knocking since we didn't know what the investigation was actually about, especially without lawyers, and as we were married as well as in the same unit that they would come looking for me as well soon enough. In the month of October 2015 I changed my full legal name. I did not hide this from him. I had shared with him*for years my intention of changing my name. He also had known the name I was changing it to. He was even on the phone with me when I was at the court house scheduling the hearing for the name change.
In the month of September 2015 the husband called me wanting to get some papers "signed and notarized" at 4am on a Saturday. I hung up on him after I said he could call at a godly hour on a day that the court house was actually open. He sent me a text immediately after saying "consider yourself blocked forever. Good riddance."
At this point none of the divorce aspects had been addressed or filed. I attempted many many times to communicate about the pending investigation with CID and the divorce over the next 4 months. I had every intention of signing a Joinder or anything to just handle it out of court with him amicably. I didn't receive anyword whatsoever or response in anyway after that text.
I was approached multiple times, to the point of harassment, in many ways by police. I moved into a secure apartment building not too long after the phone call and police officers had managed to come to my door on more than one occasion asking for my prior legal name. I would tell the police; I didn't call you, I didn't let you in and if you don't have a warrant or business to clearly state then you are not welcome and need to leave. Police came to my work. I would state the same. They also came to my father's work looking for me. (My adoptive father is Federal Special Agent with another investigation bureau.) He told me there were officers looking for me but he also turned them away. He also told me he had received messages from Detectives and officers attempting to find me that were threatening the integrity of my discharge as well as my access to my VA benefits. I turned every officer away who refused to answer my question as to what their business was. Which was basically every single one. None went to the address that I had given my ex spouse for the divorce. So I was very much so under the impression these were all Army related inquiries.
In January 2016 I became pregnant with my first child. I sent emails informing him. Still having heard no word from the spouse about anything else. Time went on. In the month of June 2016 my mom called me and told me she received a letter to her home from the spouse and she had taken the initiative to go through the mail for me and informed me that he had filed a motion for a Default Judgement of Divorce. She asked me if I had been served. I told her I hadn't received any papers nor signed any Notice of Service. My deductive reasoning tells me that the officer with the intent to serve me my divorce papers was in the mesh of the others somewhere. She gave me a phone number the spouse had listed inside and told me a court date was listed for July 5 2016. About 5 days later. She then resealed and "return to sender" the mailings.
I attempted to call and text the number she gave me and I said to the spouse that this was the first I became aware of his filing for the divorce. I was not disagreeing with the divorce however, I am currently pregnant and as I doubt he included that information in the divorce despite all my attempts to communicate, I'd be more than willing to let the divorce stand as a "Default Judgement" if he simply signed a Denial of Paternity and took a DNA test before the birth and filing of the BC. I would even pay for it. He did not respond or acknowledge. I then attempted to reach out to him in many other ways informing him that a divorce decree was not enough to prevent a situation of legally "presumed paternity". I informed him that he technically had until the birth to sign these papers and submit to a DNA test but my hand would be forced, if he refused, to file a birth certificate with his name on it. Then the Department of Child Support would take up a case in my behalf and pursue him for child support. (I was forced in August 2016 to apply for some welfare benefits because I lost my work and school funding as a direct result of a serious illness (Pneumonia) that required hospitalization. I will be on these benefits for a bit after birth until I am able to work reliably again. His refusal to sign a Denial of Paternity thus far has also played a direct role in my inability to procure reliable work or return to school again.) Then I will be forced to file a Motion to Vacate the Default Judgement of Divorce as we would then have a "child of the marriage" whose general welfare was not addressed in the divorce. I gave detailed information in all of the messages including the location of the corresponding legislation, forms and process. I even sent pictures of my ultrasounds in case he thought I was lying or something.
I had never disclosed to him that I have PCOS (a female reproductive issue that causes pretty severe infertility issues) because he has a tendency to use sensitive secrets in abusive ways. For example, after 3 years of trying to conceive with no success, he would verbalize his own conclusion for the real issue was that it was my fault because I must just be a whore. That kind of emotional abuse didn't encourage me to tell him the truth at all. About a number of things. So I thought maybe a reason he wasn't responding was he thought I was lying and even being "crazy". I in no way trust this man to leave his rights to the child open ended.
On September 19 2016 he finally responded to me on Facebook and said in writing that he had indeed received all of my messages, that he didn't care, he wasn't going to cooperate with me about anything EVER. I attempted to reiterate facts I had listed in my prior lengthy messages that detailed the applicable laws and situations, that if he allowed his name to be placed on the birth certificate at this point knowing he wasn't the bio dad that the courts could deny him the opportunity to an admissible DNA test. It would really just be best to sign the Denial of Paternity. He then emphatically stated he didn't care if the courts denied him a DNA test, he didn't want one or need one anyway, and he had been ignoring me, the messages and my existence on purpose. Then he ended the conversation with, "I'll only correspond with the proper authorities, have a good life jaja." (The idiot doesn't even speak Spanish)
I do not wish to be married to this man but at this point I am really just thinking of what I need to do for my firstborn. Custody, visitation etc. I can't imagine him being anything but abusive and malicious to My child. Especially based on how he treated me and the fact this isn't his biological child. My intent is to wait until I have to file the birth certificate with his name before I begin filing Motions in Florida to set aside the Default Judgement, as I want to give him until the very last moment to cooperate.
So my questions are; 1. Do I have a good cause of extrinsic fraud as a solid reason to Vacate the Default Judgement based on his manipulation about refusing to speak to police and intentionally using the incorrect contact information? Or what about the refusal to include the pregnancy in the paperwork originally? Will I have to possibly Petition the courts to Dismiss the entire Divorce With Prejudice because he would have filed the incorrect papers having claimed we had no property or children, but now we do as a direct result of his negligence and behavior? Then there's the aspect besides fraud, that the welfare and conditions of the child were not addressed in the divorce? Is that a viable enough reason to Vacate the Default Judgement in itself? Or could I just wrap it all up in one Motion to Vacate the Divorce like a bullet proof burrito?
P.s. my ideal situation would be to get the entire divorce dismissed from Florida so I could refile myself in the State of Washington so that custody as well as child support would all be in one place and in the same place as the child.
I'm trying to be as specific and detailed as I can the first time.
My ex Husband and I split in July 2015. No children together. I went to Washington State and he went to Florida. He still had an active Florida drivers licence while I did not have residency established in Washington, my home state yet, so I insisted he file for divorce in Florida ASAP. I provided him with the address of my grandparents that would forward directly to my impending and newly acquired apartment. I hadn't physically moved into my apartment yet at the time. In the month of September 2015 he was on the phone with me and disclosed how his VA benefits had been flagged and he was notified that he was under investigation by US ARMY CID. We are both veterans. I asked a bunch of questions about why, when how etc and he said that I just shouldn't speak to any police that come knocking since we didn't know what the investigation was actually about, especially without lawyers, and as we were married as well as in the same unit that they would come looking for me as well soon enough. In the month of October 2015 I changed my full legal name. I did not hide this from him. I had shared with him*for years my intention of changing my name. He also had known the name I was changing it to. He was even on the phone with me when I was at the court house scheduling the hearing for the name change.
In the month of September 2015 the husband called me wanting to get some papers "signed and notarized" at 4am on a Saturday. I hung up on him after I said he could call at a godly hour on a day that the court house was actually open. He sent me a text immediately after saying "consider yourself blocked forever. Good riddance."
At this point none of the divorce aspects had been addressed or filed. I attempted many many times to communicate about the pending investigation with CID and the divorce over the next 4 months. I had every intention of signing a Joinder or anything to just handle it out of court with him amicably. I didn't receive anyword whatsoever or response in anyway after that text.
I was approached multiple times, to the point of harassment, in many ways by police. I moved into a secure apartment building not too long after the phone call and police officers had managed to come to my door on more than one occasion asking for my prior legal name. I would tell the police; I didn't call you, I didn't let you in and if you don't have a warrant or business to clearly state then you are not welcome and need to leave. Police came to my work. I would state the same. They also came to my father's work looking for me. (My adoptive father is Federal Special Agent with another investigation bureau.) He told me there were officers looking for me but he also turned them away. He also told me he had received messages from Detectives and officers attempting to find me that were threatening the integrity of my discharge as well as my access to my VA benefits. I turned every officer away who refused to answer my question as to what their business was. Which was basically every single one. None went to the address that I had given my ex spouse for the divorce. So I was very much so under the impression these were all Army related inquiries.
In January 2016 I became pregnant with my first child. I sent emails informing him. Still having heard no word from the spouse about anything else. Time went on. In the month of June 2016 my mom called me and told me she received a letter to her home from the spouse and she had taken the initiative to go through the mail for me and informed me that he had filed a motion for a Default Judgement of Divorce. She asked me if I had been served. I told her I hadn't received any papers nor signed any Notice of Service. My deductive reasoning tells me that the officer with the intent to serve me my divorce papers was in the mesh of the others somewhere. She gave me a phone number the spouse had listed inside and told me a court date was listed for July 5 2016. About 5 days later. She then resealed and "return to sender" the mailings.
I attempted to call and text the number she gave me and I said to the spouse that this was the first I became aware of his filing for the divorce. I was not disagreeing with the divorce however, I am currently pregnant and as I doubt he included that information in the divorce despite all my attempts to communicate, I'd be more than willing to let the divorce stand as a "Default Judgement" if he simply signed a Denial of Paternity and took a DNA test before the birth and filing of the BC. I would even pay for it. He did not respond or acknowledge. I then attempted to reach out to him in many other ways informing him that a divorce decree was not enough to prevent a situation of legally "presumed paternity". I informed him that he technically had until the birth to sign these papers and submit to a DNA test but my hand would be forced, if he refused, to file a birth certificate with his name on it. Then the Department of Child Support would take up a case in my behalf and pursue him for child support. (I was forced in August 2016 to apply for some welfare benefits because I lost my work and school funding as a direct result of a serious illness (Pneumonia) that required hospitalization. I will be on these benefits for a bit after birth until I am able to work reliably again. His refusal to sign a Denial of Paternity thus far has also played a direct role in my inability to procure reliable work or return to school again.) Then I will be forced to file a Motion to Vacate the Default Judgement of Divorce as we would then have a "child of the marriage" whose general welfare was not addressed in the divorce. I gave detailed information in all of the messages including the location of the corresponding legislation, forms and process. I even sent pictures of my ultrasounds in case he thought I was lying or something.
I had never disclosed to him that I have PCOS (a female reproductive issue that causes pretty severe infertility issues) because he has a tendency to use sensitive secrets in abusive ways. For example, after 3 years of trying to conceive with no success, he would verbalize his own conclusion for the real issue was that it was my fault because I must just be a whore. That kind of emotional abuse didn't encourage me to tell him the truth at all. About a number of things. So I thought maybe a reason he wasn't responding was he thought I was lying and even being "crazy". I in no way trust this man to leave his rights to the child open ended.
On September 19 2016 he finally responded to me on Facebook and said in writing that he had indeed received all of my messages, that he didn't care, he wasn't going to cooperate with me about anything EVER. I attempted to reiterate facts I had listed in my prior lengthy messages that detailed the applicable laws and situations, that if he allowed his name to be placed on the birth certificate at this point knowing he wasn't the bio dad that the courts could deny him the opportunity to an admissible DNA test. It would really just be best to sign the Denial of Paternity. He then emphatically stated he didn't care if the courts denied him a DNA test, he didn't want one or need one anyway, and he had been ignoring me, the messages and my existence on purpose. Then he ended the conversation with, "I'll only correspond with the proper authorities, have a good life jaja." (The idiot doesn't even speak Spanish)
I do not wish to be married to this man but at this point I am really just thinking of what I need to do for my firstborn. Custody, visitation etc. I can't imagine him being anything but abusive and malicious to My child. Especially based on how he treated me and the fact this isn't his biological child. My intent is to wait until I have to file the birth certificate with his name before I begin filing Motions in Florida to set aside the Default Judgement, as I want to give him until the very last moment to cooperate.
So my questions are; 1. Do I have a good cause of extrinsic fraud as a solid reason to Vacate the Default Judgement based on his manipulation about refusing to speak to police and intentionally using the incorrect contact information? Or what about the refusal to include the pregnancy in the paperwork originally? Will I have to possibly Petition the courts to Dismiss the entire Divorce With Prejudice because he would have filed the incorrect papers having claimed we had no property or children, but now we do as a direct result of his negligence and behavior? Then there's the aspect besides fraud, that the welfare and conditions of the child were not addressed in the divorce? Is that a viable enough reason to Vacate the Default Judgement in itself? Or could I just wrap it all up in one Motion to Vacate the Divorce like a bullet proof burrito?
P.s. my ideal situation would be to get the entire divorce dismissed from Florida so I could refile myself in the State of Washington so that custody as well as child support would all be in one place and in the same place as the child.
