I have to assume you mean the one where ignorant people from NJ think NY is a different planet? You couldn't be more wrong. I grew up right across the river and spent significant time in NYC - as a child, as a college student (actually IN the City) and as an adult. In fact, I've spent the majority of my life in the tri-state area. So I'm hardly ignorant wrt NYC.
Yep, I am. But I'm also quite aware of what the climate differences (no, I'm not talking about the weather) are wrt COL, job market, etc.
If you've got an hour inbound, you're not likely to get 20 minutes outbound.
And it would seem that I was correct in my assessment of why you're wanting to move. No need to get snotty when people aren't as naive as you would like them to be.
As has been posted earlier, once you move out of NJ, you've pretty much given her free rein to move (with the child) out of state herself.
Moving from that to the logistics - what exactly do you mean by "shared custody"? How often do you have your son, and how old is he? Do you realize that you will likely be required to transport him both ways. Once he starts school - if he has not already - how do you intend to get him to school if you have him during the week?