My Brother Is A Thief

[liagush]

My Brother Is A Thief - SHORTENED VERSION - SORRY

What is the name of your state? ALABAMA


Sorry about the lenth in prior query.


My mother has dementia and my husband and I have cared for her and her house since my dad died in 1978. We have recently borrowed money to help with her care until we sell the house that is in mine and my brother's name. My brother has done very little to help physically or financially with my mother's care.

She gave me durable POA in 1997.

My brother is mad because she gave me a china cabinet he wanted. She wanted certain things to remain in the family and he will never have grandchildren. He has now taken everything in my mom's house.

I would like to know since I have her DPOA, can I legally have him return the items he took.

I have not told him I know that he has taken anything.

Can someone please help me?

Thanks

 

[BlondiePB]

Would you please edit and shorten this to just the legal issues? It's too much. Thank you.

 

[BlondiePB]

Does your mother have a valid will that states to whom she wants her specific belongings bequeath to?

Was there ever an inventory done of her belongings/assests?

If your mother has a valid will, where is the original copy and who is the executor?

If you are expecting your brother to reimburse you for half of the money that you borrowed for the care of your mother from the sale of the house, you may be holding your breath. He doesn't sound as if he would do so.

Thank you for shortening the original post.

 

[liagush]

Does your mother have a valid will that states to whom she wants her specific belongings bequeath to?

Was there ever an inventory done of her belongings/assests?

If your mother has a valid will, where is the original copy and who is the executor?

If you are expecting your brother to reimburse you for half of the money that you borrowed for the care of your mother from the sale of the house, you may be holding your breath. He doesn't sound as if he would do so.

Thank you for shortening the original post.

Yes, I have it and it is about 50 years old with assets to be divided equally with my brother as executor. She has verbally over the years told each of us who she wanted to receive certain things. I did a video of her belongings.

She gave me the china cabinet and he wanted it, so here we are.

He reminded me he was executor and I reminded him she was not dead yet and she trusted me with her DPOA which designates me to handle all her affairs until she dies and I intended to do exactly what she wanted. So, he steals everything.

Can the court order him to return the items to the house. I am willing to hire an attorney if this can be accomplished. Thanks

 

[BlondiePB]

You have a circular problem. Verbal requests are not honored in probate. Your mother did not specify in her will that you were to receive the china cabinet. You can report your mother's belongings as being stolen. Keep in mind that you and your brother are landlords to your mother. A letter from an attorney to your brother could help. Remember, the belongings are neither your's nor your brother's. The belongings are your mother's and will revert to her estate when she passes and then will be secured by the executor of the estate (the circular problem). Should you retrieve your mother's belongings, check your POA to determine whether or not you are allowed to sell your mother's assests. If so, then do so and use the money for your mother's care. Keep very detailed records. When your mother passes, be prepared for another battle. Consulting with an attorney is advisable.
Good luck,

BlondiePB

 

[Dandy Don]

I'm wondering why you didn't immediately file a complaint at the police department when you first discovered the theft?

 

[seniorjudge]

I'm wondering why you didn't immediately file a complaint at the police department when you first discovered the theft?

I suspect the cops would show a great disinterest and say it is a civil mattter.

Change the locks.

 

[liagush]

You have a circular problem. Verbal requests are not honored in probate. Your mother did not specify in her will that you were to receive the china cabinet. You can report your mother's belongings as being stolen. Keep in mind that you and your brother are landlords to your mother. A letter from an attorney to your brother could help. Remember, the belongings are neither your's nor your brother's. The belongings are your mother's and will revert to her estate when she passes and then will be secured by the executor of the estate (the circular problem). Should you retrieve your mother's belongings, check your POA to determine whether or not you are allowed to sell your mother's assests. If so, then do so and use the money for your mother's care. Keep very detailed records. When your mother passes, be prepared for another battle. Consulting with an attorney is advisable.
Good luck,


BlondiePB

The DPOA reads in part that if she becomes incapacitated she gives me full power and authority to do and perform all and every act, deed, matter and thing whatsoever in and about my estate, property and affairs as fully and effectually, to all intents and purposes, as I might could do in my own proper person if personally present. I put his name on the deed. I was trying to be fair and equitable. I should have known.

She is incapacitated and suffers some dementia but is still aware of what is going on in the world. As her DPOA I am trying to do what I feel she would want to do if she were able. Nothing more.

I know this is a civil matter but what good is the notarized DPOA filed with the court if I can't handle her affairs as she would want them. I have ask him to return only my personal belongs and 3 items he took and he can keep the rest. Is the DPOA as legal with her living as a will is when she is dead? I feel so betrayed and hurt because I wanted to do the right thing. Thanks Blondie

 

[liagush]

I suspect the cops would show a great disinterest and say it is a civil mattter.

Change the locks.

Too late now!!! Besides, being the person who wanted to things the right way I put his name on the deed. Bad choice. He is a dumb but "knows everything", red neck jerk. He is the one who has to face the consequences of his actions to the only one that matters! Thanks

 

[BlondiePB]

The DPOA reads in part that if she becomes incapacitated she gives me full power and authority to do and perform all and every act, deed, matter and thing whatsoever in and about my estate, property and affairs as fully and effectually, to all intents and purposes, as I might could do in my own proper person if personally present. I put his name on the deed. I was trying to be fair and equitable. I should have known.

She is incapacitated and suffers some dementia but is still aware of what is going on in the world. As her DPOA I am trying to do what I feel she would want to do if she were able. Nothing more.

I know this is a civil matter but what good is the notarized DPOA filed with the court if I can't handle her affairs as she would want them. I have ask him to return only my personal belongs and 3 items he took and he can keep the rest. Is the DPOA as legal with her living as a will is when she is dead? I feel so betrayed and hurt because I wanted to do the right thing. Thanks Blondie

DPOA dies when your mother passes. Now, do you understand why you have a circular problem? Sure, you could pursue this in civil court. If you do regain custody of your mother's belongings, upon your brother obtaining his appointment as executor after your mother passes he has the duty to take possession of mom's belongings. That's why I said if you should regain mom's belongings to sell them and use them for her care keeping the detailed records/receipts. Regardless of who has possession of mom's belongings, you and your brother will be squibbling over them in court. Keep your video inventory safe.

Your brother sounds like an ex-BIL of mine - both redneck imbeciles that know everything.

 

[seniorjudge]

Q: both redneck imbeciles that know everything

A: I am NOT going to tell you this again! I do not know everything! I am still a little fuzzy on life and women. Other than THAT, I DO know everything.

 

[BlondiePB]

Q: both redneck imbeciles that know everything

A: I am NOT going to tell you this again! I do not know everything! I am still a little fuzzy on life and women. Other than THAT, I DO know everything.

Peachy, judgey.

 

[liagush]

DPOA dies when your mother passes. Now, do you understand why you have a circular problem? Sure, you could pursue this in civil court. If you do regain custody of your mother's belongings, upon your brother obtaining his appointment as executor after your mother passes he has the duty to take possession of mom's belongings. That's why I said if you should regain mom's belongings to sell them and use them for her care keeping the detailed records/receipts. Regardless of who has possession of mom's belongings, you and your brother will be squibbling over them in court. Keep your video inventory safe.

Your brother sounds like an ex-BIL of mine - both redneck imbeciles that know everything.

I have contacted an attorney and he said my brother did not have the legal right to take anything from the house without my permission. He advised I try to resolve it. If not, I can file a judgement in Circuit Court and the Court will make him return it. I really do not want to do this.

I sent a letter to my brother and was very fair and equitable with mother's household items. We are not talking about high ticket items here, just sentimental things that was part of our childhood. He did return some things but not all. Hopefully he will do the right thing. I don't understand how he can take back after her death things that were distributed legally while she is still living.

He took away my opportunity to visit the old home place in tact and have closure with my life there. He only lived there about 7 years. He had no feelings for it. And, obviously none for the items he took because he gave all of it away. His family may have "stuff" but my family has memories that they do not because they never visited my mother and dad.

Thanks for all your help. Say a prayer for me to resolve this peacefully.

 

[seniorjudge]

Thanks for all your help.

You are welcome.

Squibbling* problems can be really bad.



(*Squabbling siblings)