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my daughter is 15yo can her mother make me pay college tuition

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Why would you not....

I just want to know WHY? Why would you not want to help pay
for YOUR daughters college?
Did you not help make this child? Do you not love this child and
want what is best for her?
Maybe I am missing something in your post.. and if I am then
I am sorry...
But... the feeling I get from it was that you want to avoid having to foot the bill.
I have no legal background what so ever so take my post for
what it is MY OPINION.
oh oh , can I answer this one?

Because he doesn't think his daughters' education is important enough. Doesn't want to see his daughter succeed.
Have I hit the nail on the head???
Ooh, I'm feeling quite bitchy tonite.


If this man was still married and the wife and him decided not to pay for the daughters collage it would be in thier rights and no one would say anything. I see no reason this man should be put down just because someone is trying to force him to do something when he is single that he would not have to do if he was still married to his daughters mom . My 16 year old son has a job and puts money away for collage. I will help where and when needed but he is learning to stand on his own 2 feet. When the daughter turns 16 maybe she should get a part time job and learn to start standing on her 2 feet and not expect a 100% free ride.
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Senior Member
Good answer A.J.

Would they ever court order married people to pay for college for ADULTS?

The more you give children, the less responsibility you teach them. We are raising a bunch of whining brats who think the world owes them everything. Part of being an adult is accepting responsibility for ones own life.

If a parent WANTS to pay for all or some of college, great. If not, also great. No one is owed a college education.


Senior Member
Maybe I'm all by myself here but I was raised that when you have kids, you do what's best for them and that includes a college education. Paying for their education is not spoiling them. You're trying to help give your children a better life so they can get a good career and be self sufficient. I wouldn't want my kids to go to the Govt to get hand outs for school as long as I'm able to pay for it. To me, spoiling kids is giving them everything that they want and they don't need it. People need a college education. I just don't understand how that can be spoiling someone. (It's not like they're 5 years old whining for dessert before dinner.) They can only better themselves for it. Unfortunately not everyone can go to college. Not only that but not everyone qualifies for financial aid. I feel I do owe my children a college education. That's the least I can do for bringing into this screwed up world. I don't think I could forgive myself if I can't put them through college. (but that's just me)

I also don't believe you can make the same grades working 2 jobs trying to pay for your schooling, you're spending all your studying time working. I know my grades suffered in high school and college when I tried it.

I'm not saying let a child become a professional student. I'm just saying that before I had kids one of the first things on my agenda is to save for their college education. I'm the parent and it's my responsibility to make sure they get the education they need so they don't grow up poor and living off welfare because they can't get a decent job because they have no decent education. That was one of my most major concerns when I thought about having kids. Guess other parents aren't as concerned about it.

I'm also only saying this about parents who can afford to send their kids through college.

I think both parents should be responsible if they can afford it whether they are together or not.

This is just my opinion and the way I was raised and what I believe in. I am in no way trying to argue or start a war. :) I understand everyone is entitled to their opinions and beliefs, just like I am. I'm just sharing my views.

To answer your question about college though. It depends on what is in the child support order or the state guidelines.
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Senior Member
I think the poster stated MAKE me pay. No one wants to be MADE to pay for anything for crying out loud. Intact families aren't MADE to pay for college, so why should divorced ones? College isn't a given after all. If one wishes a college education there are ways to do it all by yourself....geee, what a novel idea huh?



Senior Member
Apparantly the whole point of my post was missed. Maybe I should delete it before more people totally misunderstand it and I piss someone else off.

Oh yeah, if there are ways to do it yourself, I'm all ears. I can't get financial aid. Can't work because I can't get a job where my whole paycheck wouldn't go on daycare. If I could get one, I wouldn't need college. Can't get help from Social Services either. Any other ideas?

Also, me personally, I never said anyone should be made to pay for anything. Putting our kids through college was something that was decided and agreed upon before I got married and had kids. I thought most people talked this stuff over and thought about it because I thought most people wanted to put their kids through college.. damn guess I was wrong. My post wasn't about making someone do something it was about thinking of your kids best interest and what the parents feel they should do. I was only referring to me as well. I thought I made that clear. My personal feelings about my family is I should put my kids through college. I thought most parents felt that way. Stupid me.

What's with the sarcastic comment anyway? I take it that it was directed at me. If I'm wrong, sorry.
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Senior Member
I agree with Grace. My parents provided a college education for me, I had no way of paying for it myself. I paid for my travel to and from college (2 hours away from home) and that was all I could afford. I stayed in my parents home instead of a dorm because my mother was ill.

I too believe that if parents can pay for a higher education or atleast part of it then they should do so...no one should have to make them.

You are right, Kat intact families are not made to pay for college education BUT they also are not made to pay a set amount to support their children everyday. They are not forced to carry insurance, dental and health etc. Things change drasticallly when the family is no longer intact.

So should the CP help out the child who wants to go to college and the NCP not help? Or even the other way around should the NCP be forced to pay for all college and the CP none of it? No! What would hurt with them spliting it until the child can get things going on their own.

Like I said my parents paid for my college education, it was community college but it was better than nothing! My hubby put himself through school eating ramen noodles everday for 2 years because his parents thought he should pay for it himself (they also had 5 other boys). I think it all depends on the parents situation, the child's desires etc. There are a hell of a lot of parents out there who want their children to go to school but don't want to help put them through it.

Lil Miss Smarty Panties

koobie said:
What is the name of your state? louisiana
I read the state guidelines for louisiana and I couldn't find anything at all about paying for college or even paying support during college. it says child support terminates at 18 or if still in high school until age 19. Nothing at all is mentioned about college so I would say no, she can't force you to pay for it. (unless you agreed to it in your divorce?)

you can go to www.deltabravo.net and click on state resources and read all the guidelines.


I paid for my college education (still paying for it actually) and my parents were married. I agree with the last poster - if you didn't agree to it in your divorce decree then no one can force you to pay for college. Paying for my own education taught me a valuable lesson in life and your daughter and other kids need to learn that same lesson. Although it might be nice to help her out with books and such. Also, keep in mind state colleges are cheaper and offer just as good post-high school education.


Under the Radar Member
I agree, too, Grace

I think the college thing gets to be a confrontation between divorced parents more often than it does for intact families.

Do I expect my ex to pay for college? Well, yeah, I do. For starters - he asked to have it put in the decree that he will do it. Add to that the factor that he's a professor and gets breaks at a significant number of colleges & universities on tuition for his dependants and it makes sense. Does that mean I'm blithely going allong on the assumption that he'll meet that obligation? Like hell! I'm putting money away for the kids so that they will at least have some portion paid if he decides not to pay (and if he does pay, it will help with books, clothes, food, etc). But yeah - if he decides not to, I'll take him to court to try and make him pay a share. Just as I'll pay a share.

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