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My mom wants grandparents rights, my ex and I don't want her to.

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Jennx1032

Member
What is the name of your state? NY


Okay so my mom is crazy, she drinks alot and has never been their for me growing up. My mother and farther are unstable. They do nothing but fight with everone around them. My aunt raised me.
She has seen my son a hand full of times in the last 3 and a half years, one time resulting in stiches in his right eye do to her not watching my son. We have not been frendly in some time now. She has since then threatened to take me and my ex husband to court for grand parenrs rights. Can she do thi is both parents don't agree to it.What is the name of your state?
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
She can try but she won't win. DO NOT AGREE TO ANY VISITATION WITH HER IF SHE TAKES YOU TO COURT!
 

Jennx1032

Member
Thanks...both myself and my ex husband agree my parents are unstable and we don't want them near our child.
Thanks for your feed back.

Jenn
 

MyHouse

Member
And keep in mind that a lot of people threaten court and never follow through. This just could be one of her drama tactics to get you all upset.
 

Jennx1032

Member
And keep in mind that a lot of people threaten court and never follow through. This just could be one of her drama tactics to get you all upset.

Oh they are very active with the courts, i do believe they will be filing with the courts. My family files this and thet against one another, order of protections, cps ect...i stay away and try and live my life excluded from all the drama.
 

MyHouse

Member
Holy cow... Hopefully they have a reputation with the courts by now. Perhaps their history of abusing the court system could be factored in. Have they ever taken you to court before, or just other people?
 

Jennx1032

Member
Holy cow... Hopefully they have a reputation with the courts by now. Perhaps their history of abusing the court system could be factored in. Have they ever taken you to court before, or just other people?
Never me before, other people in the family though. They are nuts, I just want to be left alone. I am getting ready to re-marry and that is enough stress, not to mention my soon to be is active duty with the US Army and just got back from overseas So i already have a full plate.
 
I was sued in NY several years ago. I also was dealing with unstable GPs, and my husband and I both agreed that visitation was not in our kids best interest.

Well, guess what? The courts didn't agree and somehow we were made out to be the bad guys. We never even denied visits, just put some ground rules down that they didn't care for. It was a case of "how dare you tell me how to behave in front of your kids, I'll show you"!

Bottom line is that NY law is extremely vague and not parent friendly. Even intact families can be sued in NY.

I would take the threat seriously and do your homework. Document everything -the good, bad and ugly. Note the dates visitation occurred and the results of the visit. Even the favorable ones. Documentation with dates and times is important because the GPs will lie through their teeth. The GPs in my case didn't cite a word of truth and had nothing to back any of it up, but the Judge believed every word they said.

Don't take for granted that GPs won't win because in NY, they have the upper hand.

Blue
 
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You Are Guilty

Senior Member
I was sued in NY several years ago. I also was dealing with unstable GPs, and my husband and I both agreed that visitation was not in our kids best interest.

Well, guess what? The courts didn't agree and somehow we were made out to be the bad guys. We never even denied visits, just put some ground rules down that they didn't care for. It was a case of "how dare you tell me how to behave in front of your kids, I'll show you"!

Bottom line is that NY law is extremely vague and not parent friendly. Even intact families can be sued in NY.

I would take the threat seriously and do your homework. Document everything -the good, bad and ugly. Note the dates visitation occurred and the results of the visit. Even the favorable ones. Documentation with dates and times is important because the GPs will lie through their teeth. The GPs in my case didn't cite a word of truth and had nothing to back any of it up, but the Judge believed every word they said.

Don't take for granted that GPs won't win because in NY, they have the upper hand.

Blue
As a former ACS attorney, I can safely say that not one word of your opinion of the Family Court "bias" towards grandparents holds true in NYC, or the portions of the other counties courts I have been in. You can't extrapolate from your one case and "determine" that the entire system is biased.

(My guess is you attempted to represent yourself, and, like most pro se's in family court, came across just as loopy as the GPs did, if not more so. You'd be shocked how many parents end up screwing themselves because they get hyper-emotional and look like loons to the judge.)
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
As a former ACS attorney, I can safely say that not one word of your opinion of the Family Court "bias" towards grandparents holds true in NYC, or the portions of the other counties courts I have been in. You can't extrapolate from your one case and "determine" that the entire system is biased.

(My guess is you attempted to represent yourself, and, like most pro se's in family court, came across just as loopy as the GPs did, if not more so. You'd be shocked how many parents end up screwing themselves because they get hyper-emotional and look like loons to the judge.)
I am going to both agree and disagree with BOTH of you.

The NY statutes are VERY pro-grandparents, and what's more, NY judges tend to treat cases as if they were parent vs parent cases. Unfortunately, many NY attorneys ALSO tend to treat the cases as if they were parent vs parent cases.

Therefore, yes, in NY its best to have an attorney (but it can be done without if you are capable of doing some serious research to educate yourself) but that attorney must be an attorney with expertise in gpv, and must be an attorney who is not afraid to buck the wishes of the judge in order to get due process for their client.

If both parents are united in their opposition to gpv, its very winnable for the parents, despite the gp friendly statutes in NY. However they have to put on a very good case.
 

Rushia

Senior Member
I am going to both agree and disagree with BOTH of you.

The NY statutes are VERY pro-grandparents, and what's more, NY judges tend to treat cases as if they were parent vs parent cases. Unfortunately, many NY attorneys ALSO tend to treat the cases as if they were parent vs parent cases.

Therefore, yes, in NY its best to have an attorney (but it can be done without if you are capable of doing some serious research to educate yourself) but that attorney must be an attorney with expertise in gpv, and must be an attorney who is not afraid to buck the wishes of the judge in order to get due process for their client.

If both parents are united in their opposition to gpv, its very winnable for the parents, despite the gp friendly statutes in NY. However they have to put on a very good case.
LOL, unless you happen to be a party to my case! YAG, I love you but I have to agree with Bluemonkey. I do have an attorney who is doing her best but without going into detail as it's an on going case.....Apparently the LAW doesn't matter!
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
LOL, unless you happen to be a party to my case! YAG, I love you but I have to agree with Bluemonkey. I do have an attorney who is doing her best but without going into detail as it's an on going case.....Apparently the LAW doesn't matter!
I blame alot of your issues on your first attorney....sigh.. Much of what is happening now might not have happened if he had simply done his job right.
 

Rushia

Senior Member
I blame alot of your issues on your first attorney....sigh.. Much of what is happening now might not have happened if he had simply done his job right.
Still, we all know that what's being done to me at the moment isn't "legal".
 

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