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name change and child support????

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gypsyrose1

Guest
What is the name of your state? California
I was divorced 8 years ago...We have 2 children that were 8 and 5 at the time, they did not want me to change my name,for school purposes and such. My ex insisted on changing my name, we came to a compromise that when he remarried I would assume maiden name. Well he remarried almost two years ago. He never mention anything about it. Recently...he got mad at me, and after stopping payment on a child support check, he informed me that he will not pay any child support until I show him proof of my name change. My question is, am I legally obligated to change my name because it is stated in our divorce decree? And can he hold back child support for that reason? The actual divorce papers state - "11. Wife agrees to assume her maiden name in the event that Husband remarries and at that time makes a demand for Wife to do so." Since he made no request at the time of remarriage, can he legally make me change my name back whenever he wanted to or is it to late for such a demand. I would not mind so much, but I am getting remarried myself in July of 2003 and would hate to change everything to a new name now and then again in a few months. It is not only time consuming, but it can also be costly. I need your advise ? HELP!

Thank You Very Much, Julie Dias aka [email protected]
 


I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
gypsyrose1 said:
What is the name of your state? California
I was divorced 8 years ago...We have 2 children that were 8 and 5 at the time, they did not want me to change my name,for school purposes and such. My ex insisted on changing my name, we came to a compromise that when he remarried I would assume maiden name. Well he remarried almost two years ago. He never mention anything about it. Recently...he got mad at me, and after stopping payment on a child support check, he informed me that he will not pay any child support until I show him proof of my name change. My question is, am I legally obligated to change my name because it is stated in our divorce decree? And can he hold back child support for that reason? The actual divorce papers state - "11. Wife agrees to assume her maiden name in the event that Husband remarries and at that time makes a demand for Wife to do so." Since he made no request at the time of remarriage, can he legally make me change my name back whenever he wanted to or is it to late for such a demand. I would not mind so much, but I am getting remarried myself in July of 2003 and would hate to change everything to a new name now and then again in a few months. It is not only time consuming, but it can also be costly. I need your advise ? HELP!

Thank You Very Much, Julie Dias aka [email protected]

My response:

The court couldn't care less about your future plans. A signed order is a signed order. So, right now, and because he made his demand to you, you could be held in "contempt of court" for your violation of the MSA and order thereon.

However, your contempt is not a reason for him to stop making his child support payments. While the court may "slap you on the back of the hand," courts typically will throw him in jail for his "contempt of court", especially because he's doing it to your children out of "malicious intent." The court will order your name changed right there at the hearing.

I would file an "Order to Show Cause Re: Contempt of Court" against him - - and let him know that you'll bring a toothbrush and a change of underwear for him - - he's going "bye-bye."

So, tell him, "Hey pal, you want to play with fire? Let's see who's going to get burned."

IAAL
 
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gypsyrose1

Guest
california
dear, I am always liable,
Thank you so much for your response...It really helped me a lot...back to the divorce decree just for a moment....my atterney at the time worded the statement "wife agrees to assume her maiden name in the event that husband remarries and (this part) at that time makes a demand for wife to do so." so that he couldn't use that to harass me at any time or whenever he so well pleased. He never asked at that time or I would have been happy to do so as per or agreement. Is this wrong and it doesn't matter when he demands this of me, Iwould be in "contempt of court". I have done everything by the book as not to add fuel to the fire, trying to make life better for my kids. this is only one more way for him to control me, but so be it....doing futher research I found---(Cal. Fam. Code---2080,2081)----A woman who is divorced in California and who did not change her name during the divorce proceding can later restore her former birth name or former name at any time after the divorce becomes final. All you have to do is file a one page form with the court that divorced you.-----Is this as easy as it sounds , will they give me something to send my ex and to take to the DMV and such to finish the rest of the name change process? Once I do as he says and prove it to him , he will issue the child support payments to me until he thinks of something else to harass me with. By doing this he is off the hook once again and never is held responsible for his actions...I am so used to that I can not even begin to tell you...Once again thank you ssssooooo much for your help...I appriciate it more than you will know....Julie aka [email protected]
 
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gypsyrose1

Guest
California
If anybody else has any advise pertaining to my situation I would love to here it....I am hoping that one day I could take back a little power and self respect that was taken from me over the years...most of all I want to do what is right...especially when it comes to my beautiful children that I have been blessed with! I have already recieved great advise already and feel with this knowledge I can protect myself and my kids from futher harassment. OK, I am still a dreamer , I guess that will never change...I'll be waiting for your great responses!

[email protected]
 
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gypsyrose1

Guest
any more good advise?

California
still waiting for any advise anyone can give regaurding my situation...Thanks again, gypsyrose1
 

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