Narcissism, Dysfunction, and Disinheritance

[affadidibobo]

I have a question about Texas estate law:

I come from a HIGHLY dysfunctional birth family that is riddled with pathological narcissism. Mother had Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Dad was an "inverted narcissist" who did her bidding (or else). The only two sibs (out of four) to inherit are also narcissistic.

Younger sister and I were completely disowned/disinherited. Ironically, we have the only offspring. Of the two who inherited, one is single with no children (age 51) and the other is married with no children (age 41).

My younger sister and I believe that our father was coerced and driven to the attorney to write us both out, and he did it. This was done a few weeks after my mother's death in late 2001. Dad died last January, and my sibs refused to give my younger sister and me a copy of the wills (as probable heirs). When we finally got a copy (with the help of an attorney), we found that we had both been disinherited.

We believe that some very, very shady things have been perpetrated by my brother and sister. For example, a much talked about codicil now "never existed." Also, my mother's will still had all children listed in it, but just a few weeks later, my brother takes a grieving co-dependent man in to the attorney to write out two children.

Also, I just this week received a copy of my mother's will from 2001. There is a blatant untruth in it (she claimed to have been married once, when in reality, her marriage to my dad was a third marriage). Would that affect the legal status of that will (the lie)?

What options, if any, do we have to pursue this? A very grave injustice has been done.

Thank you so much, affadidiboboWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[anteater]

A very grave injustice has been done.

Perhaps so. The devil is obtaining sufficient evidence. Are you and your sibling willing to spend a fair amount of money (maybe $10 - $20,000) trying to prove it? With no assurance of success? If so, find an attorney with experience in will contests and give it a shot.

Also, I just this week received a copy of my mother's will from 2001. There is a blatant untruth in it (she claimed to have been married once, when in reality, her marriage to my dad was a third marriage). Would that affect the legal status of that will (the lie)?

Even if it were not 8 years after her passing, doubtful.

 

[affadidibobo]

Perhaps so. The devil is obtaining sufficient evidence.

anteater, thanks.

Do you know what type of thing would constitute "sufficient evidence"? I actually think a codicil was torn up if not a later will of my mother's. These siblings are very devious and evil (as are most narcissists).

Even if it were not 8 years after her passing, doubtful.

This is one of the issues I was talking about. Doesn't anyone care that neither my younger sister nor I were given a copy of her will 8 years ago? We were entitled to at least see it, I would think.

Do you know if anyone can contest on his own, without an attorney? That kind of money is probably out of our reach.

 

[Dandy Don]

It is too late to contest anything, now that probate is over. You should have been evaluating your options by consulting a probate attorney when probate was still open, but you probably didn't know that at the time.

 

[Zigner]

No worries - none of the stuff/money was ever yours in the first place!

 

[affadidibobo]

It is too late to contest anything, now that probate is over. You should have been evaluating your options by consulting a probate attorney when probate was still open, but you probably didn't know that at the time.

Even though my younger sister and I were mentioned in the will as living children (then in the next paragraph as diswoned), neither of us was given a copy of the will nor told anything about the date of probate. Is it not true that probable heirs should be given some notice of probate? Is it legal not to either 1.) Give all probable heirs a copy of the will, or 2.) Let them know when the will will be probated?

^^I'm referring to my father's will with the above commentary. He died in Jan. of '09, and the will was probated in April, I think, without either my younger sister or I being notified or given a copy of the will.

 

[affadidibobo]

No worries - none of the stuff/money was ever yours in the first place!

Actually, that is not true, regarding my mother's will. I was named as a beneficiary in equal amounts to my narcissistic sibs. It was after she died and when my brother took my grieving father (who had the beginnings of dementia) to an attorney to write my younger sister and I out that the situation changed.

 

[anteater]

Even though my younger sister and I were mentioned in the will as living children (then in the next paragraph as diswoned), neither of us was given a copy of the will nor told anything about the date of probate. Is it not true that probable heirs should be given some notice of probate? Is it legal not to either 1.) Give all probable heirs a copy of the will, or 2.) Let them know when the will will be probated?

^^I'm referring to my father's will with the above commentary. He died in Jan. of '09, and the will was probated in April, I think, without either my younger sister or I being notified or given a copy of the will.

If I remember correctly without searching, Texas requires notice of the opening of probate after appointment of the personal representative. I don't recall if providing a copy of the will is required or not. But the point seems to be moot since you say that you did eventually receive a copy.

Do you know if anyone can contest on his own, without an attorney?

I'm not positive if an attorney would be required or not by Texas law. If you want to try, find a law library and plan on spending at least several months there. Much better to contact a few attorneys for initial consultations. If you don't have much of a case, you will find out quickly enough.

 

[affadidibobo]

If I remember correctly without searching, Texas requires notice of the opening of probate after appointment of the personal representative.

So, you're saying that the probable heirs should have received that notice? Neither of us did. I would think that would make the proceeding at least somewhat questionable.

 

[Zigner]

Actually, that is not true, regarding my mother's will. I was named as a beneficiary in equal amounts to my narcissistic sibs. It was after she died and when my brother took my grieving father (who had the beginnings of dementia) to an attorney to write my younger sister and I out that the situation changed.

That doesn't make sense. If you were the beneficiary of your mom's will, you would have received your portion when she died. You are trying to take under your father's will, which specifically disinherits you. It is not your "stuff".

 

[affadidibobo]

That doesn't make sense. If you were the beneficiary of your mom's will, you would have received your portion when she died. You are trying to take under your father's will, which specifically disinherits you. It is not your "stuff".

I'm trying to "take"? Really? The "taking" was done by the two who benefitted.

My mother died before my father. Everything went to him. Then, my narcissistic sibs marched him to the attorney when he had the beginnings of dementia and had him go against the wishes of his dead wife. They "took" what was not THEIR stuff.

I'm sure the loved ones in your life appreciate the empathy you show!

 

[Dandy Don]

You had a case but it's too bad you didn't pursue your options earlier by consulting a probate attorney during original probate proceedings. You could have contested but it would have been expensive in legal fees and your attorney would also have tried to access the original will that may have named you as beneficiaries (which might have been destroyed) and also use medical records to see if the decedent suffered from a disease or was taking medications that would have affected mental competency.

 

[anteater]

You had a case but it's too bad you didn't pursue your options earlier by consulting a probate attorney during original probate proceedings....

And, of course, you have no idea whether the probate case is still open or not since the OP has only said that "...the will was probated in April..."

And, of course, you have no idea what Texas law says regarding time limitations to contest a will.

 

[Zigner]

I'm trying to "take"? Really? The "taking" was done by the two who benefitted.

My mother died before my father. Everything went to him. Then, my narcissistic sibs marched him to the attorney when he had the beginnings of dementia and had him go against the wishes of his dead wife. They "took" what was not THEIR stuff.

I'm sure the loved ones in your life appreciate the empathy you show!

The word "take" was used in the technical sense. A beneficiary is allowed to "take" under the will. It is a neutral word.

You are very emotional - and I don't blame you. But, from a LEGAL perspective, my answer is correct.

 

[Dandy Don]

anteater, apparently YOU have no idea about the time limitations in Texas to contest a will either, or if you were motivated by helping the original poster YOU would have supplied that information.