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need advice on visitation

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Kerilyn

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Ohio
My daughter's father hasnt seen or spoken to her in over a year. She just turned 5. He has been in and out of her life ...it seems the only time he wants to see her is when he has a woman in his life and he has been married divorced and now just married again all in a span of 3 years. I have never been married to him. So he just called yesterday out of the blue and wants to see her and he hasnt seen or sopken to her in over a year . My question is do I have to let her go with him or can I supervise the visitations at first? He is like a total stanger to her right now.
 


Kerilyn

Junior Member
We dont have any set orders for visitation ...we have never been to court ..just for child support which they just said to follow the standard visitation like every other weekend and certain holidays if the year is in even or odd number. And when we did follow this he always cancelled and then wanted to change weekends and it was like it was when it was convienient for him and we had to change plans all the time and I am not doing that again ...I think it should be on my terms if he thinks he can come an go as he pleases.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Kerilyn said:
We dont have any set orders for visitation ...we have never been to court ..just for child support which they just said to follow the standard visitation like every other weekend and certain holidays if the year is in even or odd number. And when we did follow this he always cancelled and then wanted to change weekends and it was like it was when it was convienient for him and we had to change plans all the time and I am not doing that again ...I think it should be on my terms if he thinks he can come an go as he pleases.
Ok...I am a little confused. First you state that there are no visitation orders, and then you stand that "they" told you to follow the standard guidelines. Who are "they" and was it a suggestion or a court order that you follow the standard guidelines?

If you were not court ordered to follow the standard guidelines then you can allow whatever kind of visitation that you feel is best for the child. I agree that he is likely to be a stranger to her at this point and should start out slow to give her a chance to adjust to him.

However, if you do have court ordered visitation, then you would have to take it back to court to get it changed.
 

Kerilyn

Junior Member
"They " ...I said right in that same sentance " child support " ..They(child support) gives you a stadard piece of paper of visistation to follow and we have followed that ..or I should say I have followed that and he hasnt, it is whenever he wants. But yes I do agree that if he wants to be a part of her life then fine he can visit her but on my terms now since its been over a year. I am just tired of giving in to him and letting him come and go as he pleases and confuse my daughter because I am married now and I have been with him almost 5 yrs and my husband has been around my daughter since she was 8 months old.
 

CJane

Senior Member
Kerilyn said:
" ..They(child support) gives you a stadard piece of paper of visistation to follow and we have followed that.
If that 'standard piece of paper' is signed by a judge, it is a court order and MUST be followed until modified in court. The 'problem' is that you as the custodial parent are obligated to have the child ready to see the non-custodial parent during all set visitation times, and you cannot interfere with that - but the NCP isn't required to actually visit.


So, it the 'piece of paper' signed by a judge?
 

Kerilyn

Junior Member
no ...the peice of paper is not signed by a judge. Its just something child support gives you to follow
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Kerilyn said:
no ...the peice of paper is not signed by a judge. Its just something child support gives you to follow
Is there anything in your child support order that states that "standard" or schedule A visitation is to be followed?
 

Kerilyn

Junior Member
No ..they just give you the paper that has schedule A on and say to follow that. Child support doesnt enforce visistation they just tell you to follow schedule A ...they are only there to get your money for you not visistation.
 

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