Need help quick

[mom2mike]

What is the name of your state? PA
My soon to be 15 year old son is getting himself in trouble. He's snuck out of the house numerous times, is failing three subjects in school and was hanging out with kids who are starting to drugs, steal & are just punks. I've had him in counceling to deal with the struggles he has faced but after 3 years it's not doing any good. I'm thinking of sending him to a school year round to help him with his education and to learn self displine. I strongly believe he needs way more structure than I we can give and if he keeps this up he';; be another number in the system. My problem is my ex husband. I brought this up to him & he seemed ok with it (but for the not seeing him every other weekend), but now i find out he's telling our son that he won't sign any consent forms. We have joint custody. His father is very anti authority, won't work legally, does not have a drivers licence and flat out refuses to pay child support. There is a warrant out for him now for non payment. What can I do? Would a court overrule him if it comes down to it? Oh, and the age cutoff for enrollment is before he turns 16. Can someone give me any advice?!?!

 

[BL]

What is the name of your state? PA
My soon to be 15 year old son is getting himself in trouble. He's snuck out of the house numerous times, is failing three subjects in school and was hanging out with kids who are starting to drugs, steal & are just punks. I've had him in counceling to deal with the struggles he has faced but after 3 years it's not doing any good. I'm thinking of sending him to a school year round to help him with his education and to learn self displine. I strongly believe he needs way more structure than I we can give and if he keeps this up he';; be another number in the system. My problem is my ex husband. I brought this up to him & he seemed ok with it (but for the not seeing him every other weekend), but now i find out he's telling our son that he won't sign any consent forms. We have joint custody. His father is very anti authority, won't work legally, does not have a drivers licence and flat out refuses to pay child support. There is a warrant out for him now for non payment. What can I do? Would a court overrule him if it comes down to it? Oh, and the age cutoff for enrollment is before he turns 16. Can someone give me any advice?!?!

I'm afraid unless he starts getting into trouble with the Law there's not much you can do .

Set a curfew to be in the House at night , be stern and stick with it .

If he don't see if your Courts have a PIN's Program . ( Person in Need . ) , or something similar for unruly minors .

 

[stealth2]

A court may or may not rule in your favor.

Why are you unable to provide him with the structured environment he apparently needs?

 

[mom2mike]

I do (or did) give my son a curfew. He followed it a few times but after that it was us driving all around looking for him or him just coming home late on his own with excuse. Since he has been sneaking out of the house he can't leave the yard. I've taken away his privilages & privacy telling him he has to earn them back. I took his door off the hinges & take his shoes out of his room when he goes to bed at night.

When I say structure I mean cadet like structure. He does best when someone is helping him stay on task at school, one on one. The military type structure of this gets done by 7am, then you do this, then you do that. He was in the camp cadet program this past summer & loved it. Didn't complain that if spoke when he shouldn't have he had to do push ups, things like that. I have to work full time, so does my husband so mortgage can get paid & we can eat. If I could afford to be watching him 24/7 I would but that's not an option.

 

[mom2mike]

what's a PIN program?

 

[stealth2]

what's a PIN program?

PINS. Person In Need of Supervision. Basically - you're placing him in the system.

 

[mom2mike]

I think I'm going to try military school first before I would even consider "giving him away" to a system far too messed up to begin with. But thanks, I now have another road to turn down.