Please help!!!

[Scoutsgirl3]

What is the name of your state?Oregon. Ok Here's the deal. 7 years ago I gave my daughter's to thier dad, because I was messedup and couldn't take care of them. I made the descision for thier benefit. Today, I have six years clean and I see my daughter's on a regular basis. The problem. Dad is not doing so well. His drinking is out of control( I know this because we are friends now.) My daughter's whom are 8 and 9 are wearing clothing suitable for strippers. I have remarried to a wonderful man whom loves the girls very much. We also have two children together. WE are becoming very concerned about what is going on in thier home. Dad no longer returns phone calls, then gets mad when we don't assume return times for the girls. His new girlfriend seems to think that allowing children to run rampant is ok. There are no rules or discipline in the home. Basically, what was once a very loving and responsible father, has turned into an irresponsible man. Also we have a daughter who is struggling in school. She is being tested for ADD. Dad is funtionally illiterate due to dyslexia and can'y help her with her homework. So he doesn't even bother to check to see if she has any. I have made special arrangements with her teacher to have all her homework for the week sent home on fridays, so I can spend our weekend getting her caught up. He never takes them to the doctor and becomes angry when I do. My nine year old has had to have several fillings and a tooth pulled, even though he was told to take them to the dentist. He refuses. Do I have a prayer? What in god's name do I do? I'm sorry This is so long and this is only the tip of the iceberg. I'm just a little lost as far as how to proceed.

 

[Neal1421]

What is the name of your state?Oregon. Ok Here's the deal. 7 years ago I gave my daughter's to thier dad, because I was messedup and couldn't take care of them. I made the descision for thier benefit. Today, I have six years clean and I see my daughter's on a regular basis. The problem. Dad is not doing so well. His drinking is out of control( I know this because we are friends now.) My daughter's whom are 8 and 9 are wearing clothing suitable for strippers. I have remarried to a wonderful man whom loves the girls very much. We also have two children together. WE are becoming very concerned about what is going on in thier home. Dad no longer returns phone calls, then gets mad when we don't assume return times for the girls. His new girlfriend seems to think that allowing children to run rampant is ok. There are no rules or discipline in the home. Basically, what was once a very loving and responsible father, has turned into an irresponsible man. Also we have a daughter who is struggling in school. She is being tested for ADD. Dad is funtionally illiterate due to dyslexia and can'y help her with her homework. So he doesn't even bother to check to see if she has any. I have made special arrangements with her teacher to have all her homework for the week sent home on fridays, so I can spend our weekend getting her caught up. He never takes them to the doctor and becomes angry when I do. My nine year old has had to have several fillings and a tooth pulled, even though he was told to take them to the dentist. He refuses. Do I have a prayer? What in god's name do I do? I'm sorry This is so long and this is only the tip of the iceberg. I'm just a little lost as far as how to proceed.

Was there ever a custody order in place?

 

[Scoutsgirl3]

Yes there was. I originally had custody, then gave it up to dad. He now has legal custody.

 

[Neal1421]

Yes there was. I originally had custody, then gave it up to dad. He now has legal custody.

You would have to petition the court to change custody. You would have to be able to prove that he is unfit as a father. Do you have anything that might be able to prove him unfit? It cannot just be your word against his, it doesn't work that way.

 

[Scoutsgirl3]

What would we need. We have the testimony of his mother stating that he has gone way down hill inthe last six months. We have the teacher, she triedto reach him on several occasions to get help for our 8 year-old. Which he ignored. We also have the medical and dental records showing that he has never taken them to see a dentist or a physician, only I have. We have a witnessthat saw him passed out in public face down in the sand. The girls would never say anything bad about thier dad, and I'd never ask them to. Although there was the time he went completely loco on our oldest and tried to spank her. He ended up almost breaking her finger. WE took her to the emrgency room. Once again, he had refused to do it.