Pneumonia

[summerdawn]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ca

I have been sick since the 9th of this month. I was diagnosed with Pnuemonia on Valentine's Day. So far they have tried 2 different antibiotics and I am still sick-not quite as sick as I was, but still sick. I have bronchial asthma so my body is having trouble getting better. I have emailed father (of course, he probably didn't get it, stepmom probably got it) asking if he would please reschedule mediation so that I have adequate time to completely recover. Our mediation is this upcoming Monday (6 days from now). From what I have heard, stepmom seems to think it's funny that i'm sick, but I haven't heard anything back from them regarding rescheduling.

I guess I am not generally contagious if you are in the same room with me but if I cough in the vicinity I could transmit my illness. Is there anything else I can do? I don't need to postpone it for long, maybe a week or two so that i'm not coughing up a lung when I go in...my cough usually lingers for a while after I get better because of my asthma. Also, at this point my body is still so exhausted that I have been sleeping a good portion of the time the children are in school for the day, and this weekend & last weekend the teens and my husband had to help a lot with the kids while I rested. I just want to be able to go in healthy and not exhausted, weak, and coughing...

 

[stealth2]

How about contacting the mediator? That's what I'd do.

 

[summerdawn]

How about contacting the mediator? That's what I'd do.

I thought I wasn't allowed to talk to the mediator personally if dad wasn't with me? Is it Ex Parte communication? I have called their office and they said that I can't reschedule without dad agreeing, but I didn't tell them I might be contagious, I just told them I needed to reschedule for personal reasons...I wanted to try to work it out amicably before trying to reschedule without his agreement.

 

[stealth2]

I'm continually amazed that some people can actually figure out how to procreate.

Get a note from your doctor stating that you are contagious, fax it to the mediator. Assuming you actually ARE contagious. If they still won't postpone it, go and agree to nothing. This is seriously not that tough to work out.

 

[summerdawn]

I'm continually amazed that some people can actually figure out how to procreate.

Get a note from your doctor stating that you are contagious, fax it to the mediator. Assuming you actually ARE contagious. If they still won't postpone it, go and agree to nothing. This is seriously not that tough to work out.

There is seriously no need to be mean. I get nervous about court stuff and I just want to make sure I don't do anything wrong. Even if im NOT contagious by then, and i'm sure there's a good chance that I won't be by then, I would like to be able to walk in there in decent health and not exhausted and in a mental fog from being sick for so long. It's scary enough doing this stuff healthy, i'd really like to not do it sick.

 

[stealth2]

There is seriously no need to be mean. I get nervous about court stuff and I just want to make sure I don't do anything wrong. Even if im NOT contagious by then, and i'm sure there's a good chance that I won't be by then, I would like to be able to walk in there in decent health and not exhausted and in a mental fog from being sick for so long. It's scary enough doing this stuff healthy, i'd really like to not do it sick.

It's not a matter of being mean - it's one of using some common sense. If you're not contagious, you go and agree to nothing. You've been here long enough to know that you don't have to agree to anything in mediation.

 

[summerdawn]

It's not a matter of being mean - it's one of using some common sense. If you're not contagious, you go and agree to nothing. You've been here long enough to know that you don't have to agree to anything in mediation.

OK, but if I agree to nothing doesn't that make me look like i'm not willing to work with dad, and force the mediator to have to make all of the decisions? I don't agree to all of what he is proposing, but there is an issue or two I might be willing to compromise on-I just don't want to have to deal with all of this nonsense while i'm sick. It is really stressful, I want to have a clear head. I think, in our state, we won't be allowed to mediate again for 6 months if we don't work things out in this session.

 

[stealth2]

Then I guess you go to court.

 

[summerdawn]

Then I guess you go to court.

lol, we do go to court. That's where the mediator's report is read and the judge usually goes with it. This sucks. I guess i'll call the mediator's office tomorrow and see if there's any way to postpone, and in the meantime, i'll make sure to pound vitamin c all week.

 

[Isis1]

lol, we do go to court. That's where the mediator's report is read and the judge usually goes with it. This sucks. I guess i'll call the mediator's office tomorrow and see if there's any way to postpone, and in the meantime, i'll make sure to pound vitamin c all week.

Actually, summer, the mediator doesn't get that detailed. Just disagree and the mediator sends her recommendation of a hearing for a judge to decide. In the grand scheme of things, the mediator has the least say so in the entire process.

 

[CourtClerk]

Actually, summer, the mediator doesn't get that detailed.

Are you sure about that? Because in some counties, Dawn's being one of them... they do get detailed.

Not every county works like LA County Isis... There are counties that actually make recommendations.

 

[mistoffolees]

OK, but if I agree to nothing doesn't that make me look like i'm not willing to work with dad, and force the mediator to have to make all of the decisions? I don't agree to all of what he is proposing, but there is an issue or two I might be willing to compromise on-I just don't want to have to deal with all of this nonsense while i'm sick. It is really stressful, I want to have a clear head. I think, in our state, we won't be allowed to mediate again for 6 months if we don't work things out in this session.

Then at least TRY to contact the mediator. Even if you're past the contagious stage, you can ask for a short delay in mediation based on your being sick for weeks and not having time to prepare - and not having the stamina to sit through a long mediation process. If you present it that way, you're saying that you WANT mediation to work and want to cooperate but simply need a little time so that you can do that effectively.

The worst they can do is say 'no'. But even if they say 'no', then if you refuse to say anything in mediation, you have a story for the judge if it does go to court. "Your honor, I was still recovering from pneumonia and bronchitis and was not able to participate fully in the process. It was enough of a struggle to simply breathe. I asked for a short postponement and the mediator refused. I would be willing to sit down with a different mediator or we can resolve it here, but please ignore the previous report."

Again, no guarantees, but it's a plausible position.

 

[justliving]

Hello all,

I have posted here before about losing contact with my child (it was my fault). Anyway, I also mentioned getting in contact with the mother (finally found her) and started the court proceedings. I know have another problem, My wife is not that welcoming of having another child visiting our home. I explained to her that my child will be coming to visit and that my child will only come to visit during the times that I'm home. I will not leave my child with her. She seems to think it will be unwanted drama and feels we already have a family together. The other problem is my ex wont allow my child at my home around stangers...Im not a stranger! My ex says she wants to meet my wife before anything happens. When we go to court, can I request that my ex not meet my wife and that I can just take my child when I want to? I want no dealings with my ex, I just want to see my child.

 

[Halls]

If your sick then you're sick! Contact the mediator! Really easy!

I got very well the night before a court date. I called my lawyer while seeing the doc! Doc had to send a professional letter to the judge. Things happen. I had severe contagious strep throat proven by the doctor. It got me out of court and the judge was understanding.

Get a doc note and call mediator!

 

[Just Blue]

Hello all,

I have posted here before about losing contact with my child (it was my fault). Anyway, I also mentioned getting in contact with the mother (finally found her) and started the court proceedings. I know have another problem, My wife is not that welcoming of having another child visiting our home. I explained to her that my child will be coming to visit and that my child will only come to visit during the times that I'm home. I will not leave my child with her. She seems to think it will be unwanted drama and feels we already have a family together. The other problem is my ex wont allow my child at my home around stangers...Im not a stranger! My ex says she wants to meet my wife before anything happens. When we go to court, can I request that my ex not meet my wife and that I can just take my child when I want to? I want no dealings with my ex, I just want to see my child.

Why are you posting an summer's thread???