Possibility of agreement without court involvement

[bc1982]

What is the name of your state? West Virginia

My ex girlfriend and I are expecting our daughter in July. Neither of us can afford attorneys to assist in the child support area. I was wondering if their is a way for us to come to terms in an agreement that wouldnt involve the courts. Is there a way i can give her somethign like a verbal or legal binding agreement on paper without the court fees being involved anbd the state not mandating a fixed rate to pay her. She and i have discussed what we can afford and what cannot be affored. I am a college student with only a part time job...i cant shell out my entire paychecks from my part tiem job to her and still expect to survive on my own. Anyoen know of a way that she and I can reach an agreement that doesnt involve the courts and still protect us both if one of us decides to screw the other over later on down the line?

 

[stealth2]

The two of you can come to an agreement and file it with the court - AFTER you prove paternity. But that amount will be able to be modified in the future.

I am a college student with only a part time job...i cant shell out my entire paychecks from my part tiem job to her and still expect to survive on my own.

Then son - you shouldn't have been sleeping with anyone. You're going to have a child who needs to be supported. So if you have to quit school to do so? Guess what? Say hello to Mcdonalds.

 

[bc1982]

none

i understand that "sir" but the reason she is my EX-girlfriend is because she QUIT her job before she was pregnant and doesnt even attempt to get a new one and most likely WILL NOT attempt to get one after the baby is born. She is perfectly content with sittin at home collecting my money and livin with her mom. But i respect her decisions, if she wants to do that then fine but I dotn see why, when i am the only one trying to find what is best for the baby, i should be suggested to a "lecture" comment like that. But all that aside, are u certain that it must come after paternity is determined....we are certain that the baby is mine.

 

[Neal1421]

i understand that "sir" but the reason she is my EX-girlfriend is because she QUIT her job before she was pregnant and doesnt even attempt to get a new one and most likely WILL NOT attempt to get one after the baby is born. She is perfectly content with sittin at home collecting my money and livin with her mom. But i respect her decisions, if she wants to do that then fine but I dotn see why, when i am the only one trying to find what is best for the baby, i should be suggested to a "lecture" comment like that. But all that aside, are u certain that it must come after paternity is determined....we are certain that the baby is mine.

Since it seems as though the two of you are not going to be able to settle on an amount, I suggest that you go through the court. You don't have to have an attorney for the hearing. Since she is volutarily unemployed you can ask the court to impute an income for her.

I also suggest that you attend school part-time and work full time as you do have a child that you will be responsible for.

Get the DNA test. You never know for certain that the child is yours until you do that.

 

[LdiJ]

i understand that "sir" but the reason she is my EX-girlfriend is because she QUIT her job before she was pregnant and doesnt even attempt to get a new one and most likely WILL NOT attempt to get one after the baby is born. She is perfectly content with sittin at home collecting my money and livin with her mom. But i respect her decisions, if she wants to do that then fine but I dotn see why, when i am the only one trying to find what is best for the baby, i should be suggested to a "lecture" comment like that. But all that aside, are u certain that it must come after paternity is determined....we are certain that the baby is mine.

Yes, it must come after paternity is decided.

 

[MrsK]

Lots of people have been "Certain" the baby is theirs and years later is turns out the baby is not.

If I were you, I'd use CSE. They will do a paternity test and they will set up the amount of support you will have to pay. If the two of you can agree to a lower amount, they will go by this, they just amend the paperwork and get her to sign off saying she understand she is accepting a lower amount of child support than they would award.

If you give her money without a court order, the courts can and most likely WILL view it as a gift and you could possibly be made to pay it twice. Plenty of NCP's have been screwed like this. Dont be one of them.

 

[MrsK]

Since she is volutarily unemployed you can ask the court to impute an income for her.

I also suggest that you attend school part-time and work full time as you do have a child that you will be responsible for.

Get the DNA test. You never know for certain that the child is yours until you do that.

Not in every state. In some states, if the child is under 5 yrs old, the CP is not required to work and they will not impute an income to the CP until the child is 5. He needs to find out if his state is one of these states or not.

 

[fairisfair]

Lots of people have been "Certain" the baby is theirs and years later is turns out the baby is not.

If I were you, I'd use CSE. They will do a paternity test and they will set up the amount of support you will have to pay. If the two of you can agree to a lower amount, they will go by this, they just amend the paperwork and get her to sign off saying she understand she is accepting a lower amount of child support than they would award.

If you give her money without a court order, the courts can and most likely WILL view it as a gift and you could possibly be made to pay it twice. Plenty of NCP's have been screwed like this. Dont be one of them.

Nor will CSE necessarily accept the lower amount just because the two of them agree. That opens the door to qualification for state or federal benefits that Mom would not otherwise be qualified to receive.

 

[MrsK]

Nor will CSE necessarily accept the lower amount just because the two of them agree. That opens the door to qualification for state or federal benefits that Mom would not otherwise be qualified to receive.

Them agreeing to a few hundred bucks less a month (at best! The kid works parttime) is unlikely to make her qualify for more benefits if she is not working and has a child.

 

[Neal1421]

Not in every state. In some states, if the child is under 5 yrs old, the CP is not required to work and they will not impute an income to the CP until the child is 5. He needs to find out if his state is one of these states or not.

If you re-read my post, you will see that I said that he could ask that the court impute an income for the mother. I did gurantee that the judge would do it, but he can most certainly ask.

 

[fairisfair]

Them agreeing to a few hundred bucks less a month (at best! The kid works parttime) is unlikely to make her qualify for more benefits if she is not working and has a child.

The "kid" is now a father. He gave up the right to be a kid to his child.

 

[GrowUp!]

Not in every state. In some states, if the child is under 5 yrs old, the CP is not required to work and they will not impute an income to the CP until the child is 5. He needs to find out if his state is one of these states or not.

Nobody is "required" to work. I would love to see which states (and IF they do) actually have language that states that a custodial parent does not have to work because they have a child, therefore they will NOT be imputed an income. If THAT doesn't scream unconstitutional (a couple of amendments come to mind)...

 

[GrowUp!]

Nor will CSE necessarily accept the lower amount just because the two of them agree.

CSEA's are bound by Administrative Law. They simply punch in the numbers and do the calculations per guidelines. Anything different (lower amount, deviations, etc) would have to go to the Court, where they are not bound by Admin Law.

 

[MrsK]

Nobody is "required" to work. I would love to see which states (and IF they do) actually have language that states that a custodial parent does not have to work because they have a child, therefore they will NOT be imputed an income. If THAT doesn't scream unconstitutional (a couple of amendments come to mind)...

Ah, from Louisiana State Law....RS 9:315.11


§315.11. Voluntarily unemployed or underemployed party

A. If a party is voluntarily unemployed or underemployed, child support shall be calculated based on a determination of his or her income earning potential, unless the party is physically or mentally incapacitated, or is caring for a child of the parties under the age of five years. In determining the party's income earning potential, the court may consider the most recently published Louisiana Department of Labor Wage Survey.

B. The amount of the basic child support obligation calculated in accordance with Subsection A of this Section shall not exceed the amount which the party paying support would have owed had a determination of the other party's income earning potential not been made.

C. A party shall not be deemed voluntarily unemployed or underemployed if he or she has been temporarily unable to find work or has been temporarily forced to take a lower paying job as a direct result of Hurricane Katrina or Rita.

Acts 1989, 2nd Ex. Sess., No. 9, §1, eff. Oct. 1, 1989; Acts 2001, No. 1082, §1; Acts 2004, No. 156, §1, eff. June 10, 2004; Acts 2005, 1st Ex. Sess., No. 59, §1, eff. Dec. 6, 2005.


See? My state will not impute an income for CP's who are raising "a child of the parties" if the child is under age 5. Not sure which other states do it. For the record, I agree, it shouldnt be done...but apparently it is.

 

[frylover]

It figures that MY state would allow a CP to sit on his/her butt and refuse to work and make the NCP pay for that choice. Yet another reason to be embarrassed that I live here.