Pregnant & Father wants to sign over his rights

[stealth2]

Ok, NOW I'm jealous

Just ignore him when he gets that way.

 

[Kel_Mom_of_2]

He's the one that wants ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with this child. That right there is proof to me that he wouldn't make a good father!!! And trust me, he IS the father. I tried to help him stay informed and get involved and HE wanted nothing to do with it. I know who my babies belong to. My plan is just this: if he wants nothing to do with it.. fine. I just won't let him know when the baby DOES come. I'll just live a happy healthy life with my children. For most of you that don't know, thats what life is all about! I don't NEED the money.. I NEED my children to be happy and healthy. Get a frickin clue.

 

[Twigg118]

Kel

I understand your question. I was in a similar. (this may vary by state). I was 16 when I became pregnant. The father was nice enough to offer to marry me if I had an abortion. I declined. due to being 16 with no job and very litte family support I had to go on Welfare until I could get on my feet, because of that they ordered the father to pay .. wait for it.. $20.00 a week in child support. which I saw every few months when they sent him to jail for non-payment. I never tried to keep his child from him. As far as I was concerned he had the right to be apart of my sons life whether child support was paid or not. I did this for my son NOT the father. the father did not want to ever see his son. I meet the man I am now married to when my son was 6 months old. my son is now 10 and has been adopted by my husband. how ever the judge would not accept the father's waive of rights (which he gladly signed) until all the adoption paper work was complete. they did both at the same time as the judge would not let the father walk away without someone else being responsible for my son. What this long winded message is ment to convey Is even if this guy is not a good guy, unless he will harm the child, He should be apart of your childs life, for the childs sake. Don't punish the child for the father. If he says he doesn't want anything to do with the child now. wait until the baby's born. right now to him the child is just a thought. He may feel different once the baby's born. I don't judge you for being with a man that might not be the best father. and to those that do just remember it takes two, and it is easy for some guys to say " just get rid of it" they don't have the attachment women get. (notice I said some.. Not all.) I am in no way men bashing... Good luck!! and if you ever need to talk just let me know. i've been there

 

[Kel_Mom_of_2]

Thank you for your reply. It's hard enough facing this without people jumping down my throat for what I may or may not have done wrong. I do not want my child to be without his/her dad. I really want him to be involved. I just get very scared because of things that I have heard him to say to my son, like teaching him horrible words (ex. "grippin my balls"). Also in the few times I have been in a car with him, he has almost killed us by cutting people off. He even asked me "so what hole does the baby come out of?". I would love for him to be a part of this child's life. No child deserves to go without the love of both parents. I am just very scared because of what he's already shown me. I'm hoping that once the baby is here, he will change his mind. I know I've seen it happen before. Just scared TO DEATH that he will harm our child or teach him/her horrible things. Maybe it will just happen that he wants to be involved but he, himself, will be afraid to have the child alone with him because he won't know what to do if "such and such" happens. Then I will have more time to show him some one on one with the baby so that he can be a great father. I guess for right now it is just a waiting game. I just need to think of a healthy pregnancy and birth and deal with the rest later. That is all I can do for now. Thank you sooooo much again for being calm and non-judging with me. I really appreciate it. LOL - I can really punish myself just as bad or worse than others can so the support is really nice right now.

 

[AHA]

I wish you all the best and all the luck in the world. Unfortunately(in this case) the father of the baby will have the right to be a major part in his child's life and can make your life very difficult for many years to come. By deciding to have this baby you are forever linked with this guy, and from the bad things you have mentioned about him around your other kid, I wouldn't want any child of mine anywhere near him, but you won't have a choice. He can even end up with at least joint custody if he wants and you can't do anything about it. I'm just sad to see a child being born to a father who is, at least verbally(so far, who knows what more abuse he's capabel of when he'll be alone with a child, bad words could be just the beginning!!!!) so abusive.
Good luck to you.

 

[snostar]

I do not want my child to be without his/her dad. I really want him to be involved. I just get very scared because of things that I have heard him to say to my son, like teaching him horrible words (ex. "grippin my balls"). Also in the few times I have been in a car with him, he has almost killed us by cutting people off. He even asked me "so what hole does the baby come out of?". I would love for him to be a part of this child's life.

You chose a real winner to procreate with and have already labeled this child a "mistake." You've been given accurate legal advice so go somewhere else for a shoulder to cry on.

Stealth, my comment was only a joke!!

 

[stealth2]

Stealth, my comment was only a joke!!

I know.