question about visitation

[bb3310]

i am having some issues with my ex on visitation for the christmas holidays. the divorce decree states that i have the "right to possession" of the children beginning at noon on 12/28. Does this mean that I have to pick them up by noon or that i can pick them up anytime after noon. because of my work schedule i am unable to pick them up at that time and have given her notice of when i would be able to pick them up. she is telling me that if i do not pick them up by noon that i will not be able to get them for christmas. in other portions of the divorce it specifically states that i "have" to pick them up and drop them off by certain times but for the holidays, to me says that i can get them anytime after noon on the 12/28. Can anybody help me with this please?

 

[Ohiogal]

i am having some issues with my ex on visitation for the christmas holidays. the divorce decree states that i have the "right to possession" of the children beginning at noon on 12/28. Does this mean that I have to pick them up by noon or that i can pick them up anytime after noon. because of my work schedule i am unable to pick them up at that time and have given her notice of when i would be able to pick them up. she is telling me that if i do not pick them up by noon that i will not be able to get them for christmas. in other portions of the divorce it specifically states that i "have" to pick them up and drop them off by certain times but for the holidays, to me says that i can get them anytime after noon on the 12/28. Can anybody help me with this please?

What does it state exactly in other portions of the divorce. Can someone else pick them up for you?

 

[bb3310]

someone else can but she is working as well and neither one of us can get them until 4:30. we have given her notice about this and she still is telling me if i dont get them by noon i cant get them at all. in other portions it states that i must pick them up by 6:00 pm or that they have to be dropped off by 8:00 am

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

What does it state exactly in other portions of the divorce. Can someone else pick them up for you?

Please answer OG's question, its important....

someone else can but she is working as well and neither one of us can get them until 4:30. we have given her notice about this and she still is telling me if i dont get them by noon i cant get them at all. in other portions it states that i must pick them up by 6:00 pm or that they have to be dropped off by 8:00 am

YOU are the only one who matters as far as notification. It might have been a slip of the fingers, then again, it might not have been.

 

[Nevergrowup]

If your visitation begins at noon, and you don't pick up the kids until later, doesn't that mean that your ex then needs to arrange their care in the meantime? You aren't able to arrange for someone else to get the kids until later, but you expect your ex to make sure they are taken care of on your time, how is that fair?

My point is not to criticize you but to make you think a little bit. What would you be doing with them if you got them the night before? They are your kids, sometimes they aren't convenient to your schedule. Mine live with me and they constantly interfere with "my" schedule, and I make arrangements or change my schedule. Shouldn't you do the same? Why is it your ex's responsibility?

 

[bb3310]

She has never arranged for our youngest to be in daycare, I assume part of her responsibilty is to provide daycare and other means with the money given to her in child support. That I believe is her responsibilty to provide sufficient care for my children. All the other times in the decree is stated with a specific time the day of the 28th is not specified and we have given her enough advanced notice in writing that neither I nor my wife can get the kids until 430.

 

[bb3310]

One more thing her mother lives at home with my two children and is the caregiver to my youngest during the day so she does have someone who doesn't go out of thier way to watch them until 430.

 

[Nevergrowup]

She has never arranged for our youngest to be in daycare, I assume part of her responsibilty is to provide daycare and other means with the money given to her in child support. That I believe is her responsibilty to provide sufficient care for my children. All the other times in the decree is stated with a specific time the day of the 28th is not specified and we have given her enough advanced notice in writing that neither I nor my wife can get the kids until 430.

Actually, no, your assumption as far as daycare is wrong...daycare is often on top of child support, but daycare isn't in question if your ex stays home. However, it still isn't her responsibility to care for your children during YOUR time, which is at noon. Would you feel okay with her just deciding she was unable to care for the children during several hours of her time, and informing you that you would just have to deal with it until she got around to picking them up? You are doing the same thing. The fact that she is CP doesn't change that.

Lets put it this way. Lets say, your time ended at 4 PM on a Sunday. And she informed you that she would not be available for them until 9 PM, and you might have plans. How would you feel about that? Under your theory, you would have to be fine with it and Mom could get the kids when it suited her, no?