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question regarding cohabitation, unique situation

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TXCP

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

After a coworker mentioned the case of the father/daughter who were recently arrested for incest, and had their children(who were born to them) removed from them, it's brought a question to my mind regarding my own situation.

I am the primary custodian of my child. I was granted custody based on my ex moving back and forth between my current town, and another state. The father has now lived here ever since we filed the court papers. He's remarried, and has been in the area solidly for 4 years, including a job(but is behind about 6 months on CS, due to lack of employment). (I say all this, because all the reasons I used in court, are now nonexistent, therefore making the other parent's "wrongs", not applicable, unless I keep throwing out the old accusations).

Now, my question is in regards to cohabitation of my own. I am involved in a domestic partnership with a direct(first level) relative. The noncustodial parent has been aware, but with my lawyer, I was able to keep them from using it in court. However, I’ve recently been worried that if they were to call CPS, or the state or something, that I could lose custody. This was especially heightened after a discussion with the NCP's prior employer, when I called to verify the NCP's employment. The town where the other parent lives is in a backwoods area, and I guess word gets around, and the woman pretty much told me to never call again, and that they weren't involved, and if I wasn't involved in such unholy living conditions, I wouldn't be worried about what my ex is doing.

I already have other children(who do not reside with me), who’s custodial parent REFUSES to allow me to visit with, due to the relationship I am involved in. I know that my ex and my other children’s parent are friends, and so all this knowledge has been shared. My children have also witnessed my relationship. The relative and I have been in love a very long time, and are now able to be together. We’ve both moved cross country, so that we can make this work. However, now I’m concerned that I could lose custody over this. I was able to keep it out of court using objections, but I’m not going to be able to hide this from cps. Will they take my child from me? Will they be able to actually keep my other children from me? My other ex, says they found out when our child told their class during a discussion of divorced families. Apparently, my child stated that I'd slept with this person(we were actually sleeping, not doing anything dirty), and when the teacher asked for clarification, my child gave it. The teacher contacted the guidance counselor, who then contacted my ex, and now my child is in therapy. The therapist is lobbying for my ex to take away visitation as long as the relationship continues, OR to force me to have supervised only.


Please, I am not a troll. These types of relationships are a lot more prevalent than they used to be, and are becoming more and more accepted. My family is aware, although we more or less told them that they had to accept us both, or leave us both.
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

After a coworker mentioned the case of the father/daughter who were recently arrested for incest, and had their children(who were born to them) removed from them, it's brought a question to my mind regarding my own situation.

I am the primary custodian of my child. I was granted custody based on my ex moving back and forth between my current town, and another state. The father has now lived here ever since we filed the court papers. He's remarried, and has been in the area solidly for 4 years, including a job(but is behind about 6 months on CS, due to lack of employment). (I say all this, because all the reasons I used in court, are now nonexistent, therefore making the other parent's "wrongs", not applicable, unless I keep throwing out the old accusations).

Now, my question is in regards to cohabitation of my own. I am involved in a domestic partnership with a direct(first level) relative. The noncustodial parent has been aware, but with my lawyer, I was able to keep them from using it in court. However, I’ve recently been worried that if they were to call CPS, or the state or something, that I could lose custody. This was especially heightened after a discussion with the NCP's prior employer, when I called to verify the NCP's employment. The town where the other parent lives is in a backwoods area, and I guess word gets around, and the woman pretty much told me to never call again, and that they weren't involved, and if I wasn't involved in such unholy living conditions, I wouldn't be worried about what my ex is doing.

I already have other children(who do not reside with me), who’s custodial parent REFUSES to allow me to visit with, due to the relationship I am involved in. I know that my ex and my other children’s parent are friends, and so all this knowledge has been shared. My children have also witnessed my relationship. The relative and I have been in love a very long time, and are now able to be together. We’ve both moved cross country, so that we can make this work. However, now I’m concerned that I could lose custody over this. I was able to keep it out of court using objections, but I’m not going to be able to hide this from cps. Will they take my child from me? Will they be able to actually keep my other children from me? My other ex, says they found out when our child told their class during a discussion of divorced families. Apparently, my child stated that I'd slept with this person(we were actually sleeping, not doing anything dirty), and when the teacher asked for clarification, my child gave it. The teacher contacted the guidance counselor, who then contacted my ex, and now my child is in therapy. The therapist is lobbying for my ex to take away visitation as long as the relationship continues, OR to force me to have supervised only.


Please, I am not a troll. These types of relationships are a lot more prevalent than they used to be, and are becoming more and more accepted. My family is aware, although we more or less told them that they had to accept us both, or leave us both.
Attorney. Now.

No message forum will be adequate for your needs.
 

single317dad

Senior Member
I'm not inclined to dig very deep here, but if what you're doing turns out to be illegal:

http://codes.lp.findlaw.com/txstatutes/PE/6/25/25.02

http://www.statutes.legis.state.tx.us/Docs/PE/htm/PE.12.htm

(other states' laws will vary, but not by much)

and you go to prison, what will happen to the children then?

Second the attorney.
 

TXCP

Junior Member
I have an attorney. Kind of? I mean, technically the firm is still on retainer, but in our custody battle, I had 4 different representatives, because the 1st 3 didn't agree with the living situation I was in. The 4th, won't actually take my calls, and I swear it's like she intentionally returns my calls first thing in the morning, when I can't answer, and she always has the "been so busy, sorry I missed you" line. I've tried to complain to a higher up attorney in the firm, and they just assign me someone else.

I also found out today, that 1 of my prior reps, actually quit BECAUSE of me. She didn't agree with what I was doing when I started fighting for custody, and when she was told she was "stuck" with me, she apparently quit. I called her directly, hoping that she could maybe help. I wasn't aware she had quit, nor was I ready for the barrage of morality from someone who doesn't even know me.

I wrote this post the way I did, because after researching the forum before posting, I found a thread that looks similar to something my ex would have posted. I'm actually the father here. I doubt that I'd go to prison, and they're not going to give our children back to my ex. Plus, I have already designated a guardian in the event I am not able to take care of them. That is my significant other. I've already had to go through crap with my family, I'm not going to let my ex sit here and drag me through the mud, lose my job and happiness, and my kids, just so she can get some child support from me.
 
Last edited:

Proserpina

Senior Member
I have an attorney. Kind of? I mean, technically the firm is still on retainer, but in our custody battle, I had 4 different representatives, because the 1st 3 didn't agree with the living situation I was in. The 4th, won't actually take my calls, and I swear it's like she intentionally returns my calls first thing in the morning, when I can't answer, and she always has the "been so busy, sorry I missed you" line. I've tried to complain to a higher up attorney in the firm, and they just assign me someone else.

I also found out today, that 1 of my prior reps, actually quit BECAUSE of me. She didn't agree with what I was doing when I started fighting for custody, and when she was told she was "stuck" with me, she apparently quit. I called her directly, hoping that she could maybe help. I wasn't aware she had quit, nor was I ready for the barrage of morality from someone who doesn't even know me.

I wrote this post the way I did, because after researching the forum before posting, I found a thread that looks similar to something my ex would have posted. I'm actually the father here. I doubt that I'd go to prison, and they're not going to give our children back to my ex. Plus, I have already designated a guardian in the event I am not able to take care of them. That is my significant other. I've already had to go through crap with my family, I'm not going to let my ex sit here and drag me through the mud, lose my job and happiness, and my kids, just so she can get some child support from me.
You have no grasp of reality.

Good evening.
 

Eekamouse

Senior Member
It's lovely how you put the needs of your children, first, before your own wants and desires - not. What are you doing? Are you trying to teach your children that it's okay to be in a relationship with a family member who is much too closely related to them? I don't even want to know how closely related your family member/bed partner is to you. I can guess from just the reactions you've been getting from people you've hired to help you that it is a very close family member. Please explain how you can possibly think you are the best choice for primary parent? Even if all your exes are evil, neglectful caregivers, I think foster care would still be the best choice over you.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
I have an attorney. Kind of? I mean, technically the firm is still on retainer, but in our custody battle, I had 4 different representatives, because the 1st 3 didn't agree with the living situation I was in. The 4th, won't actually take my calls, and I swear it's like she intentionally returns my calls first thing in the morning, when I can't answer, and she always has the "been so busy, sorry I missed you" line. I've tried to complain to a higher up attorney in the firm, and they just assign me someone else.

I also found out today, that 1 of my prior reps, actually quit BECAUSE of me. She didn't agree with what I was doing when I started fighting for custody, and when she was told she was "stuck" with me, she apparently quit. I called her directly, hoping that she could maybe help. I wasn't aware she had quit, nor was I ready for the barrage of morality from someone who doesn't even know me.

I wrote this post the way I did, because after researching the forum before posting, I found a thread that looks similar to something my ex would have posted. I'm actually the father here. I doubt that I'd go to prison, and they're not going to give our children back to my ex. Plus, I have already designated a guardian in the event I am not able to take care of them. That is my significant other. I've already had to go through crap with my family, I'm not going to let my ex sit here and drag me through the mud, lose my job and happiness, and my kids, just so she can get some child support from me.
So, presumably, the bolded part is still you writing as Mom. The other part is you admitting you are a liar. Why should anyone believe you at this point?
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I have an attorney. Kind of? I mean, technically the firm is still on retainer, but in our custody battle, I had 4 different representatives, because the 1st 3 didn't agree with the living situation I was in. The 4th, won't actually take my calls, and I swear it's like she intentionally returns my calls first thing in the morning, when I can't answer, and she always has the "been so busy, sorry I missed you" line. I've tried to complain to a higher up attorney in the firm, and they just assign me someone else.

I also found out today, that 1 of my prior reps, actually quit BECAUSE of me. She didn't agree with what I was doing when I started fighting for custody, and when she was told she was "stuck" with me, she apparently quit. I called her directly, hoping that she could maybe help. I wasn't aware she had quit, nor was I ready for the barrage of morality from someone who doesn't even know me.

I wrote this post the way I did, because after researching the forum before posting, I found a thread that looks similar to something my ex would have posted. I'm actually the father here. I doubt that I'd go to prison, and they're not going to give our children back to my ex. Plus, I have already designated a guardian in the event I am not able to take care of them. That is my significant other. I've already had to go through crap with my family, I'm not going to let my ex sit here and drag me through the mud, lose my job and happiness, and my kids, just so she can get some child support from me.
Lovely. YOu are engaging in incest which may very well be illegal AND you are a liar. You just destroyed any hope of getting any advice from here. You designating a guardian matters not. Mom is not unfit and therefore she has first dibs on custody of HER children. Not your incestuous lover.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

After a coworker mentioned the case of the father/daughter who were recently arrested for incest, and had their children(who were born to them) removed from them, it's brought a question to my mind regarding my own situation.

I am the primary custodian of my child. I was granted custody based on my ex moving back and forth between my current town, and another state. The father has now lived here ever since we filed the court papers. He's remarried, and has been in the area solidly for 4 years, including a job(but is behind about 6 months on CS, due to lack of employment). (I say all this, because all the reasons I used in court, are now nonexistent, therefore making the other parent's "wrongs", not applicable, unless I keep throwing out the old accusations).

Now, my question is in regards to cohabitation of my own. I am involved in a domestic partnership with a direct(first level) relative. The noncustodial parent has been aware, but with my lawyer, I was able to keep them from using it in court. However, I’ve recently been worried that if they were to call CPS, or the state or something, that I could lose custody. This was especially heightened after a discussion with the NCP's prior employer, when I called to verify the NCP's employment. The town where the other parent lives is in a backwoods area, and I guess word gets around, and the woman pretty much told me to never call again, and that they weren't involved, and if I wasn't involved in such unholy living conditions, I wouldn't be worried about what my ex is doing.

I already have other children(who do not reside with me), who’s custodial parent REFUSES to allow me to visit with, due to the relationship I am involved in. I know that my ex and my other children’s parent are friends, and so all this knowledge has been shared. My children have also witnessed my relationship. The relative and I have been in love a very long time, and are now able to be together. We’ve both moved cross country, so that we can make this work. However, now I’m concerned that I could lose custody over this. I was able to keep it out of court using objections, but I’m not going to be able to hide this from cps. Will they take my child from me? Will they be able to actually keep my other children from me? My other ex, says they found out when our child told their class during a discussion of divorced families. Apparently, my child stated that I'd slept with this person(we were actually sleeping, not doing anything dirty), and when the teacher asked for clarification, my child gave it. The teacher contacted the guidance counselor, who then contacted my ex, and now my child is in therapy. The therapist is lobbying for my ex to take away visitation as long as the relationship continues, OR to force me to have supervised only.


Please, I am not a troll. These types of relationships are a lot more prevalent than they used to be, and are becoming more and more accepted. My family is aware, although we more or less told them that they had to accept us both, or leave us both.
So, you are in a romantic relationship with a parent, full sibling or one of your children?...because that is what first degree means in terms of a relative.

If you are so in denial that you cannot realize how wrong that is, on all levels, then you should not have anything more than supervised visitation with any of your children, and could very well find your parental rights terminated. Those kinds of relationships are NOT becoming more and more accepted. It doesn't matter to me that you lied about being mom to start with, and then confessed to being dad. Gender is immaterial here.
 

I'mTheFather

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX
Please, I am not a troll.
Frankly, whenever an original post mentions trolls, I think it's a troll.

Besides, the postings have so many inconsistencies, I can't figure out what the situation is. He mentions having custody, then mentions the therapist lobbying for no visitation. He says the father is married, then says he has a significant other. Plus, the teacher and guidance counselor discovered the incestuous relationship and didn't call CPS??? I call complete and total BS.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I just tell myself it's a loon researching a fictional book that will end up rejected by every publishing house in America.

:rolleyes:
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Now stellar dad has this thread:

NCP not exercising visits


What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

Is this worth pursuing? The NCP is supposed to have 1st, 3rd & 5th weekends. However, with her job, it is a 4 on 2 off schedule, and so often times when her weekends come around, she says she can't take the kids, because she can't get the weekend off. Our mediator told her to get a different job so that she could have those weekends off, and she refused, saying she'd allegedly lose benefits and seniority when it came to vacations? However, she works 12 HR shifts. It's in our parenting plan that if SHE has to work that weekend, I have the option to keep them. Right now, she's saying it's easier to do the 1 weekend a month, and wants to go to court again, to try and adopt a "tailored visitation plan". When I told her that CS could go up, she laughed and said that child support wasn't her concern, and that spending time with them is. She says that it would be easier for her job to give her a definitive 3 day weekend, versus just having the 2 (or 3) weekends off permanently. She says that she wants to do this, so that on her weekend(if we go to just 1 weekend), she will actually have the days off to spend time with them, rather than them going to a sitter. That takes time away from me being able to spend personal time with my SO, and with my job, I travel a lot(working offshore).

Could this not be used against her? She got to keep him all Christmas break, because we went on vacation. So she does see him, but she tries to extend it, instead of taking the weekends.
My response:
You are kidding right? Look at all your threads. You seem to be looking at a way to "get mom" rather than doing what is in the best interest of the children. Seriously. And the mediator told her to get a different job? The mediator has no right to say that. If she lost this job you would be griping about CS not being paid. Or if she got a new job that paid less you would be griping about that. For others, POSTING HISTORY. And you should keep all your threads together in one. You don't need to start a different thread each day.
Granted he only has two threads but they are NOT about the best interest of the child.
 

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