Well, it pisses me off, as well.
What you'll need to start with is a debt validation. You'll need to make sure that the check she's referring to actually exists and has your signature on it. If she will not validate, then you can safely send a cease and desist and be done with her (if and) until she files suit. Then you can prove to the judge (with a certified mail receipt) that you requested validation and received nothing. You'll want to check the docket for your county's court on a regular basis and make sure she's not trying to slip a default judgment through against you by serving at an incorrect address. Also check the docket for the county you lived in when this debt was supposedly incurred. Many counties allow you to check the docket online.
First, send a debt validation letter to the "attorney." To get the address, pretend to be scared and ask for the address to send a payment to. Then, send your certified (RRR) debt validation letter to that address.
You can find a sample validation letter at:
http://www.creditinfocenter.com/forms/sampleletter9.shtml
Obviously, you'll want to get rid of the identity fraud crud and simple deny any knowledge of the debt. You're a smart individual; you can tailor the letter to your particular situation.
Now, once you've sent the letter, check your credit report IMMEDIATELY and save a dated copy of the report. Pull from all three bureaus. You'll want to see if they have reported the debt on there. If they have, check a couple of days after you get your green card (from the certified letter) back. If the debt is not listed as "in dispute", then they owe you up to $1000. If it's not, pull your report again after you receive any further correspondence from them (or from time to time even if you get nothing back from them). You'll want to make sure this debt never appears on your report UNTIL THEY HAVE PROVEN THAT THE DEBT IS YOURS. If it shows up on your credit report and is not marked in dispute after your validation letter is received, it's a violation of the FDCPA.
You'll also want to send a modified cease and desist letter to the same address, but send it in a SEPARATE letter. Send it certified mail, RRR, just like the other. You can find a sample cease and desist here:
http://www.creditinfocenter.com/forms/sampleletter7.shtml
You'll want to modify the letter to say that you are not permitted to be contacted at work, as your employer does not allow such calls. If you receive any further phone calls at home OR work, you will immediately and without hesitation file suit against them for the maximum statutory and actual damages permissible by law. State that all future contact is permitted BY MAIL ONLY.
Also mention (kindly) that you would have no means to pay any debt that you may owe (should they complete the legally-required validation you requested in your letter dated xx/xx/xxxx, certified mail number xxxxxxxxxxxxxx) if you lose your job due to additional contact.
The "attorney" won't care, but a judge certainly would be able to sympathize with your situation as long as you're following the law to the letter, which you are. They would not be by contacting you further.
After that, if you receive phone calls from the office, RECORD THEM. You can get recorders you can hook up to your phone at Radio Shack. Also save any messages they may leave on your answering machine. NEVER CALL THEM BACK IF THEY DO. Just save the messages. Continued collection activity is prohobited until they prove you owe the debt. Since you've sent them the C&D letter, they are not allowed to call you anyway.
EDIT: You can record calls without the consent of the other party in IA. This makes it much more convenient to catch them making illegal and threatening statements on the phone. Don't let them keep calling if they do. Mention (on the call you're recording) that you send a certified letter (dated xxxx certified mail number xxxx) requiring them to cease communication with you by phone. It was received on xx/xx/xxxx and signed for by xxxxxxxx. Then if they DO call again, the judge is going to do more than slap them on the wrist.
Read the FDCPA and (as Ladynred says) get real friendly with it.
You can find it here:
http://www.ftc.gov/os/statutes/fdcpa/fdcpact.htm
I hope this is helpful. Feel more than free to reply if you need ANY more help with this. These scams need to STOP. NOW.
You may also want to kindly mention in your VALIDATION LETTER that you've contacted the establishment that the law office says you supposedly owe the debt to, and they have no record of your bouncing a check at any of their locations.
One additional jab can't hurt