Rushia - in response...

[stealth2]

What I was referring to with Candice was the way DD shrieks. Her DD does the same. I (and my 3 sisters) did it when younger. Don't all small female children shriek when they don't get what they want?

No, all small female children do NOT shriek when they don't get their own way. Only those whose parents allow them to get away with it. Not all small children - male or female - whine, either. Or throw temper tantrums.

And I frankly see no reason why older kids should constantly have to put up with entertaining the littles. If you want a babysitter, pay them for it. Or else do the job yourself.

To address the karate kick from an 11yo to a 4yo... you're right - it's not on. But when a 4yo is permitted to be a brat, I can understand when an 11yo simply has enough and loses control. So perhaps the adults need to (a) supervise a bit better and (b) tell the little to knock off the bratty behavior. 'Cause I'd find the shrieking and carrying on bratty. Crap like that would earn at least a time out on my watch.

 

[splainthisone]

No, all small female children do NOT shriek when they don't get their own way. Only those whose parents allow them to get away with it. Not all small children - male or female - whine, either. Or throw tetmper tantrums.

And I frankly see no reason why older kids should constantly have to put up with entertaining the littles. If you want a babysitter, pay them for it. Or else do the job yourself.

To address the karate kick from an 11yo to a 4yo... you're right - it's not on. But when a 4yo is permitted to be a brat, I can understand when an 11yo simply has enough and loses control. So perhaps the adults need to (a) supervise a bit better and (b) tell the little to knock off the bratty behavior. 'Cause I'd find the shrieking and carrying on bratty. Crap like that would earn at least a time out on my watch.

These little shriekers learn from the big shriekers (Rushia).

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

No, all small female children do NOT shriek when they don't get their own way. Only those whose parents allow them to get away with it. Not all small children - male or female - whine, either. Or throw tetmper tantrums.

And I frankly see no reason why older kids should constantly have to put up with entertaining the littles. If you want a babysitter, pay them for it. Or else do the job yourself.

To address the karate kick from an 11yo to a 4yo... you're right - it's not on. But when a 4yo is permitted to be a brat, I can understand when an 11yo simply has enough and loses control. So perhaps the adults need to (a) supervise a bit better and (b) tell the little to knock off the bratty behavior. 'Cause I'd find the shrieking and carrying on bratty. Crap like that would earn at least a time out on my watch.

You can understand how an 11 year old could lose control, but not a 4 year old? Kicking a 4 year old is not a form of a bratty tantrum?

 

[stealth2]

You can understand how an 11 year old could lose control, but not a 4 year old? Kicking a 4 year old is not a form of a bratty tantrum?

We're talking about a 4yo who apparently makes a habit of shrieking and having tantrums so as to be catered to. The 11yo should certainly be punished as well. But it seems as though this is a pattern of behavior for BOTH families. So for Rushia to expect the 11yo to be the only one held accountable isn't right. IMO.

Both she and her ex need to grow a pair and discipline the child THEY have control of. And the parent in charge of her needs to supervise better than they have up to now.

 

[splainthisone]

We're talking about a 4yo who apparently makes a habit of shrieking and having tantrums so as to be catered to. The 11yo should certainly be punished as well. But it seems as though this is a pattern of behavior for BOTH families. So for Rushia to expect the 11yo to be the only one held accountable isn't right. IMO.

Both she and her ex need to grow a pair and discipline the child THEY have control of. And the parent in charge of her needs to supervise better than they have up to now.

Hopefully, Rushia is planning on "home schooling" the shrieker. This atrocious behavior is a direct reflection of the parents inability to properly discipline the children in the family.

 

[Rushia]

No, all small female children do NOT shriek when they don't get their own way. Only those whose parents allow them to get away with it. Not all small children - male or female - whine, either. Or throw temper tantrums.

I really don't like to argue with you but EVERY young female child that I've ever known has been a shrieker.

And I frankly see no reason why older kids should constantly have to put up with entertaining the littles. If you want a babysitter, pay them for it. Or else do the job yourself.

If the 11 yo is willing to play make believe games with a 6yo then I see no reason why she can't play with the 4yo. Quite simply the cousin is a spoiled brat and allowed to make the rules in her own home and expects us all to cater to her. I won't.

To address the karate kick from an 11yo to a 4yo... you're right - it's not on. But when a 4yo is permitted to be a brat, I can understand when an 11yo simply has enough and loses control. So perhaps the adults need to (a) supervise a bit better and (b) tell the little to knock off the bratty behavior. 'Cause I'd find the shrieking and carrying on bratty. Crap like that would earn at least a time out on my watch.

You are taking a joke between myself and Candice and blowing it out of proportion. My child does not shriek every time she doesn't get her way nor does she throw tantrums. My reference to Candice was simply that she's seen my Dd, knows she's tiny and she's not about to be bullied.

Just so you're all aware, I'm guessing Mary locked the thread cause I didn't.

 

[Rushia]

These little shriekers learn from the big shriekers (Rushia).

LOL. She didn't learn it from me. You haven't been her long and I would think that you don't know anything. She's 4, she shrieks end of story. It still doesn't excuse a 11yo kicking her for tattling.

 

[Rushia]

You can understand how an 11 year old could lose control, but not a 4 year old? Kicking a 4 year old is not a form of a bratty tantrum?

Thank you. My child did not shriek when she didn't get her way. She tattled. There was no screaming this time until she was kicked.

 

[Rushia]

We're talking about a 4yo who apparently makes a habit of shrieking and having tantrums so as to be catered to. The 11yo should certainly be punished as well. But it seems as though this is a pattern of behavior for BOTH families. So for Rushia to expect the 11yo to be the only one held accountable isn't right. IMO.

Both she and her ex need to grow a pair and discipline the child THEY have control of. And the parent in charge of her needs to supervise better than they have up to now.

Once again. You are blowing something WAY out of proportion. My child is in no way perfect however when she does pull her routine she is sent to her room until she stops. If you want to discuss my son, well then I'd agree with you.

My son is the one we have trouble controlling due to other issues. If you'd like to take it to pm, I'll explain that further. However, I will have you and others know that parental assessments were done on myself and my hubby since we have the children about 95% of the time. We are in no way at fault for the way my children do behave. We and ex and SM are doing what we are supposed to. There is just absolutely NO excuse for an 11yo child kicking (esp with 2 years of karate training) a 4yo.

 

[Rushia]

Hopefully, Rushia is planning on "home schooling" the shrieker. This atrocious behavior is a direct reflection of the parents inability to properly discipline the children in the family.

Once again. You have no idea what you're talking about. My child has been in daycare and PreK. Her behavior is above reproach. Like every other small female child that I have EVER seen she shrieks. Please read my above response to Stealth on parental assessments done on myself.

You are all blowing something WAY out of proportion.

 

[stealth2]

I really don't like to argue with you but EVERY young female child that I've ever known has been a shrieker.

Well then - you've never met mine. 'Cause she has never shrieked. I don't tolerate it. Never have, never will.

If the 11 yo is willing to play make believe games with a 6yo then I see no reason why she can't play with the 4yo. Quite simply the cousin is a spoiled brat and allowed to make the rules in her own home and expects us all to cater to her. I won't.

Whether you see a reason or not is moot. People are allowed to "play" with those they choose to play with. For example.... why is it okay for you to "play" with with Candace in posts, but not okay for splainthisone to "play" with you? Because it's your choice who to play with. Same with kids. Where do you think they learn it?

Quite simply, from what YOU posted, your 4yo is a bit of a brat as well. And you cater to it. 'Cause you and you sisters behaved the same way.

The difference between 4 and 6 is pretty big when it comes to behavior. Again, if the adults expect the 11yo to babysit, she should be compensated. Or the adults should supervise the younger child(ren).

You are taking a joke between myself and Candice and blowing it out of proportion. My child does not shriek every time she doesn't get her way nor does she throw tantrums. My reference to Candice was simply that she's seen my Dd, knows she's tiny and she's not about to be bullied.

Hey - I can only go by what you post. WTF do I know from jokes between you and whoever. They're not private when you post them to a public board.

 

[stealth2]

And I'm not saying it's all your fault, Rushia. Your ex holds responsibility. So do this niece's parents. The behavior of BOTH children is out of control.

 

[Rushia]

Well then - you've never met mine. 'Cause she has never shrieked. I don't tolerate it. Never have, never will.

Lucky you. I keep trying to clarify for you. You're just not getting it. My daughter shrieks in PLAY. On the occasion that she does it for a tantrum, no it's not tolerated and taken care of immediately. Quite frankly, when I have a housefull of kids, they run, shriek and make a ton of noise as a bunch of small children will do. In a game of hidenseek, tag, chase, cops and robbers, spies etc... I could care less if they shriek, so what. The only damage they are doing is to my eardrums.

Just as an edit, yes when much younger she did shriek when she didn't get her way. According to therapist perfectly normal behavior until child can be taught it's not appropriate.

Whether you see a reason or not is moot. People are allowed to "play" with those they choose to play with. For example.... why is it okay for you to "play" with with Candace in posts, but not okay for splainthisone to "play" with you? Because it's your choice who to play with. Same with kids. Where do you think they learn it?

Splain is simply jumping on a bandwagon that you created. If you believe that the 11yo should be compensated for entertaining my children then I'll expect my children to be compensated when they are forced to entertain her when the adults who are responsible for her don't want to deal with her.

Quite simply, from what YOU posted, your 4yo is a bit of a brat as well. And you cater to it. 'Cause you and you sisters behaved the same way.

Once again, I keep trying to explain it to you. My children have been seen by a therapist. Parental assessments have been done. My son is the only one who has a problem. I discipline my children appropriately. I believe that a therapist who has seen my children would know a touch more about them than anyone on an internet forum. So what, my sisters and I ran around shrieking outside too. Did we shriek at our mother, umm NO. My mom would have smacked my rear. My daughter is the "sanest" child of the bunch. Does she have her moments, well yeah.

The difference between 4 and 6 is pretty big when it comes to behavior. Again, if the adults expect the 11yo to babysit, she should be compensated. Or the adults should supervise the younger child(ren).

LOL, once again, you don't know my children. The 4yo is actually more emotionally "mature" than the 6yo. Once again, I'll keep the compensation in mind when the 4yo is forced to share her toys or play with the 11yo cause the adults don't want to entertain the 11yo. My 6yo and the cousin are the "prince and princess" of the family. He is the first born male and she's the firstborn and as such they do no wrong (hence my son being in therapy). They are never forced to share anything with my 4yo, she is forced on a consistant basis to share her toys and games she plays if they want to play with her. As is my ex's 18 month old child. Want to explain that to me? If it's good for the goose.....

Hey - I can only go by what you post. WTF do I know from jokes between you and whoever. They're not private when you post them to a public board.

Ugh, I keep trying to explain this to you. WHY do you think that an 11yo has the right to kick (with 2 years of karate training) a 4yo who looks to be about 2. I don't care if my daughter had spit on her, the 11yo should have more sense than to hurt a 4yo. My daughter simply wanted to play with them. She didn't deserve to be kicked for it. End of story.

 

[CandiceH]

The only thing I can vouch for is the 4yr old behavior and she is actually an excellent child. She has a screech on her, as does my daughter - they rival each other in that department. The only time I have heard the 4 yr old screech is in play.

Yes, I agree the ex needs to take more forward approach when dealing with the 11yr old BUT if the ex were to mutter a word, there would be a nuclear war in progress. The 11yr old is obviously out of control and has NO business hitting a 4 yr old (especially one that weights 30lbs or less). Peanut can NOT stick up for herself to this child who is known to all as a demon.

I dont know where the arguments came in and what started this war on the forum (or if there even is one) but Rushia's questions on what she could possibly do to stop this child are valid! I would want those answers too if I were in this situation and knowing this child and what she is capable of.

I hope I didnt cause any more disruptions but I had to come to Rushia's defense on this one. She disciplines her children very well and in all honesty, I think she is one of the most loving, patient and friggin SCARY parents I have ever encountered. LOL Rushia - that stern voice scares ME!

 

[Rushia]

The only thing I can vouch for is the 4yr old behavior and she is actually an excellent child. She has a screech on her, as does my daughter - they rival each other in that department. The only time I have heard the 4 yr old screech is in play.

Yes, I agree the ex needs to take more forward approach when dealing with the 11yr old BUT if the ex were to mutter a word, there would be a nuclear war in progress. The 11yr old is obviously out of control and has NO business hitting a 4 yr old (especially one that weights 30lbs or less). Peanut can NOT stick up for herself to this child who is known to all as a demon.

I dont know where the arguments came in and what started this war on the forum (or if there even is one) but Rushia's questions on what she could possibly do to stop this child are valid! I would want those answers too if I were in this situation and knowing this child and what she is capable of.

I hope I didnt cause any more disruptions but I had to come to Rushia's defense on this one. She disciplines her children very well and in all honesty, I think she is one of the most loving, patient and friggin SCARY parents I have ever encountered. LOL Rushia - that stern voice scares ME!

LOL, have you seen "the look"? Oh boy, did you hear hubby at all when you were over last week? LOL, you think I'M scary?!!