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Sexually esplicit e-mail exchange with a 16 year old

  • Thread starter Concerned, but in love
  • Start date

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Concerned, but in love

I am a 30 year old man who lives in Missouri. I met a 19 year old woman from New York State, on the internet. we struck up an e-mail penpal relationship, then a phone one, and then fell in love.

We had a e-mail and phone sexual relationship, although we never met, in person, and have never even been in the same state at the same time.

We planned for her to move out her to go to college. The moving date approached, and she confessed to me that she was 16, not 19.

I was devestated. She was very close to her 17th birthday. I looked up the Statutory Rape laws in both states on the internet. 17 is the age of consent in both states. we decided to wait for her birthday and go on with our plans.

She turned 17 yesterday. Problem is, her mother has found some of old, pre-birthday letters, some of which our sexually explicit.

She is threatening to go to the D.A. if we don't end our relationship.

I KNOW she is young, and I have moral issues with it myself. But I am in love. If we do proceed as planned, I believe her mother will take action.

What are the repercussions? Now that she is 17, is there any chance of a D.A. pressing charges? Without the "victim" as a witness? But with some sexuallly esplicit e-mail?


concerned but in love

That was the wrong answer. She's an adult, and I love her. I don't want a moral judgement, or some idiot telling me "Go find someone else". That's pointless. She is the one for me, and I'm going to fight for it. Did I at any point imply that this was a passing fancy? I think not.

I want LEGAL advice about my LEGAL situation.

Down and Out

I have a similar situation, oddly enough. Different states, but same legal problem. No advice from the lawyers?


You can't be charged with statutory rape since you were never even in the same STATE with her.

In NY, you could be charged with disseminating obscene material to a minor, but you have an affirmative defense that you reasonably believed she was over 17.

In Missouri, for any sex crime prosecution involving a minor, it is an affirmative defense that you reasonably believed she was 17 or older. Also, all the MO pronography crimes require you to act knowingly, so reasonably thinking that she's over 18 is an affirmative defense there too. I couldn't find anything you could be charged with in MO. But then, I'm not a prosecutor there.....

This is not legal advice and you are not my client. Double check everything with your own attorney and your state's laws.

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