Should he ask or not?

[gotmyown3]

What is the name of your state? AL but MS jurisdiciton

My husband has custody of his 13 year old daughter, by MS court order. His ex got a significant increase in her salary at the same time he was given custody (we were unaware of this until a month or so after the order was signed). My mother in law still lives in his ex's area, and she saw in their newspaper that the MS teachers are getting another increase in their salaries. His ex is a MS teacher. My mother in law is telling my husband that he should write his ex and let her know that he is aware of her two salary increases and ask if she would be agreeable to an adjustment in the child support based on her new income or else he will have to take her to court. My husband is reluctant to address this issue. I say let sleeping dogs lie, but then again, this is money to help take care of their child. What do you advise he do?

 

[GrowUp!]

What is the name of your state? AL but MS jurisdiciton

My husband has custody of his 13 year old daughter, by MS court order. His ex got a significant increase in her salary at the same time he was given custody (we were unaware of this until a month or so after the order was signed). My mother in law still lives in his ex's area, and she saw in their newspaper that the MS teachers are getting another increase in their salaries. His ex is a MS teacher. My mother in law is telling my husband that he should write his ex and let her know that he is aware of her two salary increases and ask if she would be agreeable to an adjustment in the child support based on her new income or else he will have to take her to court. My husband is reluctant to address this issue. I say let sleeping dogs lie, but then again, this is money to help take care of their child. What do you advise he do?

What does the court order say about increases? How much do they have to be?

Just because someone is getting an increase, does not mean it gives them an automatic right to a modification -- or would even qualify for one. Especially for teachers because there are usually hoops involved with increases. Plus, there are other factors like health insurance costs, out-of-pocket teaching expenses, etc. If he were to file for a modification, he would have the burden of proving there has been a significant change in circumstance -- and if he were to go through CSEA, he would need evidence of such -- not what the newspaper reports.

If the court order specifically addresses significant increases, then that could possibly be addressed at the time of a modification, if either parent has the legal responsibility to report it (meaning some retro support, possibly).

 

[yolandanewell]

What I would do....

And I am SO NOT AN EXPERT or a moderator....

This is a personal decision in some ways - if he chooses to get the support raised and they have an amicable relationship... than ask her! Then make it legal with a hearing. It sounds to me that you two are doing fine without the added income (since you're saying let sleeping dogs lie) so it would be an addition to the childs savings account, if nothing else.

However, the law (at least here in California) states that if either parents income changes they MUST report it to the courts in order for a support re-evaluation. They ask us to wait for a substantial change and that the substantial change remains that way for a good period of time.

If she has not done this (I don't know about your laws) than she is not following the 'rules' and approaching her on the issue first may cause a rift.

 

[GrowUp!]

This is a personal decision in some ways - if he chooses to get the support raised and they have an amicable relationship... than ask her! Then make it legal with a hearing. It sounds to me that you two are doing fine without the added income (since you're saying let sleeping dogs lie) so it would be an addition to the childs savings account, if nothing else.

There is no guarantee there is even enough of a change to warrant a modification. Plus, the ex isn't obligated to cooperate -- and the law states the same -- with any requests for financial information until a court proceeding has commenced.

However, the law (at least here in California) states that if either parents income changes they MUST report it to the courts in order for a support re-evaluation. They ask us to wait for a substantial change and that the substantial change remains that way for a good period of time.

As off-the-wall some CA laws are from the "rest of us" LOL, I find it hard to believe that any parent who receives a modest 2 or 3% COL increase is required to report it. If one is making 25k and gets a 2% COL increase, that is NOT much at all. Talk about tying up the courts for an increase over a couple of bucks - literally.

 

[gotmyown3]

Thanks. I don't recall the order stating anything about salary increase, just that if the child's insurance premium goes up (the ex pays the insurance) then they will share the cost without the need of a court order for the new amount.

No, they are not friendly at all. The reason I say let it alone, is that his ex only calls their child once or twice a month, doesn't see her or write her, and my stepdaughter's counselor said that my stepdaughter has finally learned to handle her mother's behavior and rejection without feeling the need to "act out". I don't want to have to "stir the pot" so to speak, and see the whole thing start up again.

 

[qurice]

How significant was the first increase? and the second? If it's been a while since the last order was put in place, it may be worth looking into. Run the numbers with your state's CS calculator and see if it's enough of a change for you want to pursue.

Teachers often pay a lot for insurance especially with dependants, at least this is the case here in TX. If dad has it available to him, he may want to look into making sure the coverage is comparable and what it would cost for him to carry it instead. It may be cheaper for both mom and dad to go that route also.

Unless your state statutes allows for it to be taken into account, out of pocket expenses for a teacher wouldn't, you'd have to check your statutes. Mom could then say she spends half her income on teaching expenses.

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks. I don't recall the order stating anything about salary increase, just that if the child's insurance premium goes up (the ex pays the insurance) then they will share the cost without the need of a court order for the new amount.

No, they are not friendly at all. The reason I say let it alone, is that his ex only calls their child once or twice a month, doesn't see her or write her, and my stepdaughter's counselor said that my stepdaughter has finally learned to handle her mother's behavior and rejection without feeling the need to "act out". I don't want to have to "stir the pot" so to speak, and see the whole thing start up again.

I personally agree with you. That's not a legal response, its a personal one.