starlight1364
New member
I am the mother of a 26 year old man who has Level 1 Autism, and I have decided to pursue getting a legal guardianship over my son. (We live in New York State, by the way). I have decided to pursue getting a guardianship over my son because his Autism prevents him from understanding the consequences of his actions, and thus impairs his ability to behave and make choices in a responsible manner. I am not just saying this based on my own feelings, I am saying this because it is evidenced by the very concerning behaviors that my son has exhibited these past six years.
One example of this is an incident that occurred back in 2019 when my son was 19 years old. My son had violently threatened and attacked a boy and his family on Facebook because he had made fun of him in middle school. He sent death threats to the boy and his family, and he narrowly avoided getting arrested and sent to jail. It was this incident that prompted my son’s doctor at that time (who has now retired due to having Long COVID) to have him taken to a psychiatrist so that he could be given an evaluation. This psychiatrist is the one who formally diagnosed our son with Autism (Level 1).
Even worse than that is my son’s refusal to take care of his Diabetes. My son has a genetic form of Diabetes called MODY (Maturity Onset Diabetes of the Young) type 3, and at first it could be managed simply by taking pills, but now it has progressed to the point where he needs to take insulin to manage his blood sugars. My son, however, consistently refuses to take the insulin prescribed to him, and he also refuses to adhere to any dietary restrictions to keep his blood sugars under control. His diabetes is therefore completely uncontrolled, and he refuses to do anything about it.
Another concerning behavior my son has exhibited is his consistent failure to keep up with his academics. My son actually got kicked out of Stony Brook University because he repeatedly chose to goof off instead of doing the school work he was supposed to do. He then had to finish his undergraduate degree at an online college, but even there he frequently chose to fool around instead of doing his work. Thus, it took him three years after getting kicked out of SBU to finish his bachelor’s degree (in history) at this online college, meaning it took him seven years just to finish a bachelor’s in history.
Perhaps most concerning of all is an incident which occurred last year at an elementary school. My son (who was 25 at this time) had gone over to a public elementary school to play on the swings. He went to the school after the school day had ended, but what he didn’t realize was that the school was still open past its usual time because it was parent teacher conference night. He then walked around the school looking into the windows, and that was when school staff saw him and panicked. He was told he couldn’t be there, so he left, and then when he got to the parking lot, the principal of the school came out after him. He told the principal he had just come to play on the swings, and then the principal shouted at him, took a picture of his license plate. When my son opened his mouth to ask him why he did that, the principal cut him off and sharply demanded that he leave in a harsh and punishing tone. My son was very upset about the way he was treated, but he doesn’t understand how his behaviors looked to others, and that they made him look like a child predator. This was why the staff panicked, and this was why the principal dealt with him in such a harsh way.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, my son started sending messages to the principal and staff at the school, telling them that he just wanted to play on the swings, and asking them not to call the police. It got to the point where the school had to send security guards to our house to tell my son to stop.
After that, I called the school, and I apologized to them about my son’s behavior. I explained to them that he has Autism, and that it prevents from understanding the consequences of his actions, and therefore prevents him from behaving in an appropriate manner. The lady who I spoke to on the phone was very kind and understanding, and she wished me luck, since being the mother of an autistic son is not for the faint of heart.
This last incident is what made me realize that my son is not capable of functioning as a responsible adult because of his Autism, and that is why I have decided to pursue a legal guardianship over him, because this is what I know he needs. I’d really appreciate some advice.
One example of this is an incident that occurred back in 2019 when my son was 19 years old. My son had violently threatened and attacked a boy and his family on Facebook because he had made fun of him in middle school. He sent death threats to the boy and his family, and he narrowly avoided getting arrested and sent to jail. It was this incident that prompted my son’s doctor at that time (who has now retired due to having Long COVID) to have him taken to a psychiatrist so that he could be given an evaluation. This psychiatrist is the one who formally diagnosed our son with Autism (Level 1).
Even worse than that is my son’s refusal to take care of his Diabetes. My son has a genetic form of Diabetes called MODY (Maturity Onset Diabetes of the Young) type 3, and at first it could be managed simply by taking pills, but now it has progressed to the point where he needs to take insulin to manage his blood sugars. My son, however, consistently refuses to take the insulin prescribed to him, and he also refuses to adhere to any dietary restrictions to keep his blood sugars under control. His diabetes is therefore completely uncontrolled, and he refuses to do anything about it.
Another concerning behavior my son has exhibited is his consistent failure to keep up with his academics. My son actually got kicked out of Stony Brook University because he repeatedly chose to goof off instead of doing the school work he was supposed to do. He then had to finish his undergraduate degree at an online college, but even there he frequently chose to fool around instead of doing his work. Thus, it took him three years after getting kicked out of SBU to finish his bachelor’s degree (in history) at this online college, meaning it took him seven years just to finish a bachelor’s in history.
Perhaps most concerning of all is an incident which occurred last year at an elementary school. My son (who was 25 at this time) had gone over to a public elementary school to play on the swings. He went to the school after the school day had ended, but what he didn’t realize was that the school was still open past its usual time because it was parent teacher conference night. He then walked around the school looking into the windows, and that was when school staff saw him and panicked. He was told he couldn’t be there, so he left, and then when he got to the parking lot, the principal of the school came out after him. He told the principal he had just come to play on the swings, and then the principal shouted at him, took a picture of his license plate. When my son opened his mouth to ask him why he did that, the principal cut him off and sharply demanded that he leave in a harsh and punishing tone. My son was very upset about the way he was treated, but he doesn’t understand how his behaviors looked to others, and that they made him look like a child predator. This was why the staff panicked, and this was why the principal dealt with him in such a harsh way.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, my son started sending messages to the principal and staff at the school, telling them that he just wanted to play on the swings, and asking them not to call the police. It got to the point where the school had to send security guards to our house to tell my son to stop.
After that, I called the school, and I apologized to them about my son’s behavior. I explained to them that he has Autism, and that it prevents from understanding the consequences of his actions, and therefore prevents him from behaving in an appropriate manner. The lady who I spoke to on the phone was very kind and understanding, and she wished me luck, since being the mother of an autistic son is not for the faint of heart.
This last incident is what made me realize that my son is not capable of functioning as a responsible adult because of his Autism, and that is why I have decided to pursue a legal guardianship over him, because this is what I know he needs. I’d really appreciate some advice.
