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SSDI and Ex spouse

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DivorcedMom

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kentucky
My Children are now ages 16 and 18 (still enrolled in high school) Their 52 yr old father recently won his disability claim and both children received a lump sum payment. ( 2 yrs retroactive). The father was a little over $10,000 behind in child support payments. I was informed by the Child Support Office in our county, that either way, I would receive payment for these arrears, either from him, if he was denied disability insurance, or by disability if he was approved....Therefore, I assumed, once we found out from the SSA that he was, in fact approved, that I would then be paid the amount he owed in arrears, (which accrued while awaiting a disability determination). I was under the assumption, that this would be paid from his SSDI backpay benefit amount and paid directly to the child support enforcement agency in our county, and they would then forward it to me. I was surprised to learn that it was paid to the children, and I wouldn't receive this money. Not only that, my child support monthly amount (his original court ordered obligation amount) would also be terminated and the children would now be receiving this money. I was confused because I had obligations to pay back, for financially assisting me during the two years I received no child support assistance! It was my intention to use the backpay to help pay people I borrowed from and back debts that I got behind in or held off paying (I'm almost in foreclosure procedures on our house) I explained my dire financial situation to my banker when I stopped receiving monthly child support payments and he graciously worked with me on my house payments, and did so on a Good Faith Effort from me, that I would turn the money over to him as I received it! Now that he is approved, and the kids received the back pay that I assumed was entitled to me for their financial support and living expenses, I have nothing to assist me in repaying/compensating the people/places, I turned to for help during all of these financially struggling times! I have cried and researched and cried some more..... please understand I am not greedy, or a a gold digger, I live by solemn means, and don't have fancy things or purchase things for myself. I am very happy for my children and through my dismay, I tell them I am in no way upset with them, for receiving the money. But .....I just couldn't wrap my head around the idea that this actually did happened...and apparently it is completely legal and happens every day.... I started looking up information, (by Googling of course!) and read about Auxiliary payments to parents, .. also said to be Parent benefits for "child in care"....I also read some where, that stated a divorced mother could receive benefits as well as the child receiving benefits as long as the child was disabled or under 16. My daughter is now 16, and is her own payee.,.but she and her brother did, both received a back payment check, going back 2 years....Would I be able to apply for benefits during the 2 yr back payment span? My child would have been 14 & 15 yrs old during those times...which falls within the age guidelines. .(Note...I was married to their father for 18 + years and we have 4 children! The oldest is 27 now and is totally disabled, I have a 25 year old, and 18 year old son and the youngest child is 16. Their father and I divorced in 2008 and He pretty much had only his court ordered child support payments to give and/or be invested in his children's lives after our divorce...He rarely came to get them for visitation when they were small, did offer much of his time, or his money...Should I just forget about this matter and move on? Any information would be appreciated! Thank you in advance!
PS the only family court stuff filed is where
I applied for child support enforcement assistance early on, so I could have a record on file and receive their assistance in collecting it, when he would fall behind in his obligations. They would put liens against his income tax refunds and things like that to assist me in receiving payments...but that's all!
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kentucky
My Children are now ages 16 and 18 (still enrolled in high school) Their 52 yr old father recently won his disability claim and both children received a lump sum payment. ( 2 yrs retroactive). The father was a little over $10,000 behind in child support payments. I was informed by the Child Support Office in our county, that either way, I would receive payment for these arrears, either from him, if he was denied disability insurance, or by disability if he was approved....Therefore, I assumed, once we found out from the SSA that he was, in fact approved, that I would then be paid the amount he owed in arrears, (which accrued while awaiting a disability determination). I was under the assumption, that this would be paid from his SSDI backpay benefit amount and paid directly to the child support enforcement agency in our county, and they would then forward it to me. I was surprised to learn that it was paid to the children, and I wouldn't receive this money. Not only that, my child support monthly amount (his original court ordered obligation amount) would also be terminated and the children would now be receiving this money. I was confused because I had obligations to pay back, for financially assisting me during the two years I received no child support assistance! It was my intention to use the backpay to help pay people I borrowed from and back debts that I got behind in or held off paying (I'm almost in foreclosure procedures on our house) I explained my dire financial situation to my banker when I stopped receiving monthly child support payments and he graciously worked with me on my house payments, and did so on a Good Faith Effort from me, that I would turn the money over to him as I received it! Now that he is approved, and the kids received the back pay that I assumed was entitled to me for their financial support and living expenses, I have nothing to assist me in repaying/compensating the people/places, I turned to for help during all of these financially struggling times! I have cried and researched and cried some more..... please understand I am not greedy, or a a gold digger, I live by solemn means, and don't have fancy things or purchase things for myself. I am very happy for my children and through my dismay, I tell them I am in no way upset with them, for receiving the money. But .....I just couldn't wrap my head around the idea that this actually did happened...and apparently it is completely legal and happens every day.... I started looking up information, (by Googling of course!) and read about Auxiliary payments to parents, .. also said to be Parent benefits for "child in care"....I also read some where, that stated a divorced mother could receive benefits as well as the child receiving benefits as long as the child was disabled or under 16. My daughter is now 16, and is her own payee.,.but she and her brother did, both received a back payment check, going back 2 years....Would I be able to apply for benefits during the 2 yr back payment span? My child would have been 14 & 15 yrs old during those times...which falls within the age guidelines. .(Note...I was married to their father for 18 + years and we have 4 children! The oldest is 27 now and is totally disabled, I have a 25 year old, and 18 year old son and the youngest child is 16. Their father and I divorced in 2008 and He pretty much had only his court ordered child support payments to give and/or be invested in his children's lives after our divorce...He rarely came to get them for visitation when they were small, did offer much of his time, or his money...Should I just forget about this matter and move on? Any information would be appreciated! Thank you in advance!
PS the only family court stuff filed is where
I applied for child support enforcement assistance early on, so I could have a record on file and receive their assistance in collecting it, when he would fall behind in his obligations. They would put liens against his income tax refunds and things like that to assist me in receiving payments...but that's all!
Why aren't you the payee for the children's back payments? And more importantly why won't the children give you that money to keep a roof over their head?
 

Janke

Member
Odd that SSA is paying benefits directly to a minor who is not emancipated. And your adult child lives with you and won't give you any of the back pay and you are still giving him a free place to stay.
h y
Too bad you were given incorrect information from the Child Support office. SSA makes payment decisions without any regard for child support issues. Children's benefits are not the same as child support although a family court may use the existence of child's benefits in determining child support.

The court order would place liens against his own Social Security benefits but not those of the children. SSA's job is to enforce the lien, nothing else, not to decide what is equitable.

You could file the claim and find out if you qualify. I can't remember if divorce is a disqualifying event.
 

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