What is the name of your state? Georgia
I had pressed aggravated stalking charges against a man in Florida over a decade ago. He spent 5 days in jail (even called me from jail!) and was given a year's probation and anger management sessions. He called me this morning in my new home with my new husband to wish me a happy birthday and tell me he still loved me. Can I get any kind of order of protection now? Do I have any legal options?
The background
Back in 1993, I met and dated a man who was 10 years older than me, a former pro football player. As it turns out, he lied about his age - he was closer to 20 years older than me, with TWO ex-wives and three kids - it took a while for me to find out about them. I thought I was young an sophisticated dating an older man - duh, the stupidity of a chick inher early twenties. This relationship was off and on for about a year.
He had problems at work, and started going out and getting drunk a lot. He was arrested for disorderly intoxication after horsing around with some guys in a parking lot. He decked the cop, and ran. He was booked for battery of a law enforcement officer and escape. This was right before I broke it off for good.
After I broke it off, he became obsessed. He would put chapstick on and leave his lip prints on my windshield and rearview mirror. He followed my friends to their homes, confronted men I dated. (I stopped dating for about a year and half) He left me messages alternating between expressions of his undying love and hatred at my lack of contact with him. He called me and left mesages about all my movements, what I was wearing, who I talked to, from the evening before. So creepy knowing he was watching me. I moved three times and begged him to leave me alone. He mailed me stuff - some loving messages, gifts, cds, and some hateful and awful messages. He told me he would never stop. He said he would never hurt me, but couldn't stand the thought of me being with someone else, so he would hurt anyone I was with and it would be my fault. That was when I stopped dating and started moving. I was scared of him - I'd seen him hit a man before (he hit on me in a bar, and got punched in the face) and knew about the cop punch too.
He mailed me 2 beautiful romantic birthday cards, but he had written "I hate you you f--king lying b--ch" in one and something like "All your feelings died with your Mother you b---ch" and tore them in half and mailed them to me at work. He called me at work and I begged him to leave me alone - he said he never would - that I would have to leave the country and he still wouldn't stop. So I went to the police.
I had a really hard time getting an order of protection. The police told me to go to the sherriff, the sherriff said to go to the police, back and forth until I collapsed on the floor of the sherriff's office crying with my collection of his notes. So I finally got my restraining order.
Needless to say, he broke the order of protection, and I reported him. A female sherriff called me and said she spoke with him, and it was "he said, she said" and that was that. I conferenced her into my voicemail and started playing his messages, his pledges of undying love and nasty threats, even the message he left that was just a song playing.
So he was picked up for aggravated stalking. He called me from jail. He was in jail for 5 days.
I went to court, I told the judge I was scared. He got a year's probation and anger management, and was to stay away from me.
Court, I think, was January of 1996. He left me alone that year - I think. Over the years sicne, I have heard from him occasionally. He showed up at my work once. He sent me flowers and cards. They tapered off.
Five years ago I moved to Georgia- I rented an apartment with a 24 hour concierge and security cameras in the parking deck and common areas, and didn't put my name out front. I made the leasing office aware of him, just in case. He called me once and caught me on the phone. I told him I didn't want to talk to him and hung up.
A couple years ago he called and left me a message that his Father died, and he knew I could empathize and he wanted to talk to me about it. His message said he expected me to call because he knew I wasn't heartless, but if I didn't call he knew where he stood. I didn't call. Of course!
Just over a year ago I got married to a lovely man. 5 months ago we moved into a new home.
At 7:24am, he called,today. He said he wanted to wish me a happy birthday and that he would always love me. He said he knew I was married, but if I ever wasn't....he would always love me.
I was stunned, and wish I could have thought of the right thing to say.
Sounds like a bad lifetime movie - even to me.
There was no threat. But I am still scared. I am scared he will show up, I am scared he will find my husband. Can I get an order of protection? I know it's just a piece of paper - but I'd like him arrested if he comes near me.
I had pressed aggravated stalking charges against a man in Florida over a decade ago. He spent 5 days in jail (even called me from jail!) and was given a year's probation and anger management sessions. He called me this morning in my new home with my new husband to wish me a happy birthday and tell me he still loved me. Can I get any kind of order of protection now? Do I have any legal options?
The background
Back in 1993, I met and dated a man who was 10 years older than me, a former pro football player. As it turns out, he lied about his age - he was closer to 20 years older than me, with TWO ex-wives and three kids - it took a while for me to find out about them. I thought I was young an sophisticated dating an older man - duh, the stupidity of a chick inher early twenties. This relationship was off and on for about a year.
He had problems at work, and started going out and getting drunk a lot. He was arrested for disorderly intoxication after horsing around with some guys in a parking lot. He decked the cop, and ran. He was booked for battery of a law enforcement officer and escape. This was right before I broke it off for good.
After I broke it off, he became obsessed. He would put chapstick on and leave his lip prints on my windshield and rearview mirror. He followed my friends to their homes, confronted men I dated. (I stopped dating for about a year and half) He left me messages alternating between expressions of his undying love and hatred at my lack of contact with him. He called me and left mesages about all my movements, what I was wearing, who I talked to, from the evening before. So creepy knowing he was watching me. I moved three times and begged him to leave me alone. He mailed me stuff - some loving messages, gifts, cds, and some hateful and awful messages. He told me he would never stop. He said he would never hurt me, but couldn't stand the thought of me being with someone else, so he would hurt anyone I was with and it would be my fault. That was when I stopped dating and started moving. I was scared of him - I'd seen him hit a man before (he hit on me in a bar, and got punched in the face) and knew about the cop punch too.
He mailed me 2 beautiful romantic birthday cards, but he had written "I hate you you f--king lying b--ch" in one and something like "All your feelings died with your Mother you b---ch" and tore them in half and mailed them to me at work. He called me at work and I begged him to leave me alone - he said he never would - that I would have to leave the country and he still wouldn't stop. So I went to the police.
I had a really hard time getting an order of protection. The police told me to go to the sherriff, the sherriff said to go to the police, back and forth until I collapsed on the floor of the sherriff's office crying with my collection of his notes. So I finally got my restraining order.
Needless to say, he broke the order of protection, and I reported him. A female sherriff called me and said she spoke with him, and it was "he said, she said" and that was that. I conferenced her into my voicemail and started playing his messages, his pledges of undying love and nasty threats, even the message he left that was just a song playing.
So he was picked up for aggravated stalking. He called me from jail. He was in jail for 5 days.
I went to court, I told the judge I was scared. He got a year's probation and anger management, and was to stay away from me.
Court, I think, was January of 1996. He left me alone that year - I think. Over the years sicne, I have heard from him occasionally. He showed up at my work once. He sent me flowers and cards. They tapered off.
Five years ago I moved to Georgia- I rented an apartment with a 24 hour concierge and security cameras in the parking deck and common areas, and didn't put my name out front. I made the leasing office aware of him, just in case. He called me once and caught me on the phone. I told him I didn't want to talk to him and hung up.
A couple years ago he called and left me a message that his Father died, and he knew I could empathize and he wanted to talk to me about it. His message said he expected me to call because he knew I wasn't heartless, but if I didn't call he knew where he stood. I didn't call. Of course!
Just over a year ago I got married to a lovely man. 5 months ago we moved into a new home.
At 7:24am, he called,today. He said he wanted to wish me a happy birthday and that he would always love me. He said he knew I was married, but if I ever wasn't....he would always love me.
I was stunned, and wish I could have thought of the right thing to say.
Sounds like a bad lifetime movie - even to me.
There was no threat. But I am still scared. I am scared he will show up, I am scared he will find my husband. Can I get an order of protection? I know it's just a piece of paper - but I'd like him arrested if he comes near me.