stepmother rights?

[michelecable196]

What is the name of your state? NC

My husband has a 15 year old son from a previous marriage. They have joint legal custoday and the mother is the custodial parent. There have been incidents at school involving my step son that the mother does not think she has to inform the dad. 2 times that we know have, my step son has been suspended. There is to be a parent/teacher meeting and my husband is in Iraq. Do I have the right to attend in my husband's stead?What is the name of your state?

 

[ErinGoBragh]

No, you have no rights to attend such a meeting as you are a legal stranger to the child.

 

[txrose1998]

What is the name of your state? NC

My husband has a 15 year old son from a previous marriage. They have joint legal custoday and the mother is the custodial parent. There have been incidents at school involving my step son that the mother does not think she has to inform the dad. 2 times that we know have, my step son has been suspended. There is to be a parent/teacher meeting and my husband is in Iraq. Do I have the right to attend in my husband's stead?What is the name of your state?

Easy answer: NO! Not your child, not your right.

 

[fairisfair]

No, you have no rights to attend such a meeting as you are a legal stranger to the child.

uh hold on. . . . . Poster, what makes you think that you WOULD have rights, of any kind?

Just hopin'? or perhaps you hold some form of POA for your deployed hubby?

Maybe there is something in the court order??

Stranger thngs have happened.

 

[michelecable196]

stepmother rights

I do hold POA but certainly not over the step child. I am not a stranger to the child. Before my husband deployed, my step son spent alternate weeks with us. Of course that went out the window when he deployed. Now mind you, the mother has no problem letting my step son spend weekends with me, pick him up from school, etc. Why would I not be able to attend this meeting if my husband has asked me to?

 

[txrose1998]

I do hold POA but certainly not over the step child. I am not a stranger to the child. Before my husband deployed, my step son spent alternate weeks with us. Of course that went out the window when he deployed. Now mind you, the mother has no problem letting my step son spend weekends with me, pick him up from school, etc. Why would I not be able to attend this meeting if my husband has asked me to?

When we say stranger....we mean "legal stranger." Legally, you have no more rights than a babysitter to the child.

 

[ray123]

I feel for you lady. My current wife is a step mother for my daughter who also is 15 years old. She has helped me provide for my daughter her entire life. The mother sits on her butt and does nothing. Just this year I filed for Child Support and half of the tuition which the mother has to pay now. Getting back to the point, when it comes to paying tuition and saving for my childs college my wife is always there but the Ex quickly overlooks this. She is only her mother when it suits her. I don't think I answered your question but I just wanted to let you know that I have great respect for your feelings.

 

[txrose1998]

I feel for you lady. My current wife is a step mother for my daughter who also is 15 years old. She has helped me provide for my daughter her entire life. The mother sits on her butt and does nothing. Just this year I filed for Child Support and half of the tuition which the mother has to pay now. Getting back to the point, when it comes to paying tuition and saving for my childs college my wife is always there but the Ex quickly overlooks this. She is only her mother when it suits her. I don't think I answered your question but I just wanted to let you know that I have great respect for your feelings.

This is not a forum for feelings....this is a forum for legal advice. Seems like this is being said a lot today...

 

[LdiJ]

I do hold POA but certainly not over the step child. I am not a stranger to the child. Before my husband deployed, my step son spent alternate weeks with us. Of course that went out the window when he deployed. Now mind you, the mother has no problem letting my step son spend weekends with me, pick him up from school, etc. Why would I not be able to attend this meeting if my husband has asked me to?

Again, because under the law you are a legal stranger and do not have that right. Now, its possible that your husband could participate telephonically if you can assist in getting the school to schedule accordingly. Or, he could have his own telephonic conference with the school, separately from mom.

 

[majomom1]

I do hold POA but certainly not over the step child. I am not a stranger to the child. Before my husband deployed, my step son spent alternate weeks with us. Of course that went out the window when he deployed. Now mind you, the mother has no problem letting my step son spend weekends with me, pick him up from school, etc. Why would I not be able to attend this meeting if my husband has asked me to?

Have you asked Mom if you could attend so that you can inform Dad? That would be the simplest way. If she doesn't mind you having visitation or picking the child up, maybe she would agree to your attending... just a thought.

Either way, Mom should be keeping Dad in the loop as to what is going on...

 

[michelecable196]

stepmother rights

What is the name of your state? NC

My husband has a 15 year old son from a previous marriage. They have joint legal custoday and the mother is the custodial parent. There have been incidents at school involving my step son that the mother does not think she has to inform the dad. 2 times that we know have, my step son has been suspended. There is to be a parent/teacher meeting and my husband is in Iraq. Do I have the right to attend in my husband's stead?What is the name of your state?

Learn something new every day. I had never heard the term legal stranger. So basically, while my husband is away, my rights (legal or not) are dictated by the mother. Because clearly I am not that legal stranger when she needs me to take my step son off her hands. Guess I need to take a step back and let the chips fall where they may and hopefully nothing more serious develops while my husband is away. Telephonic conferenceing is out of the question. I am lucky to get an email once a week due to the nature of his duty.
Thank you all for your responses.

 

[>Charlotte<]

So basically, while my husband is away, my rights (legal or not) are dictated by the mother.

No. You have many rights, none of which are dictated by the mother.

Because clearly I am not that legal stranger when she needs me to take my step son off her hands.

But remember--having no legal authority also means you have no legal obligation. Choosing to help with your step son because of the love and respect you have for him and/or his father is a nice thing to do, but it's your choice.

 

[michelecable196]

stepmother rights

By choice is true. The child is the only one that loses should I stop helping. Thank you all. This has truly been enlightening and much appreciated.

 

[stealth2]

It is refreshing to have such a gracious newbie.

Thank your husband for us - his work is much appreciated.

 

[Zephyr]

Learn something new every day. I had never heard the term legal stranger. So basically, while my husband is away, my rights (legal or not) are dictated by the mother. Because clearly I am not that legal stranger when she needs me to take my step son off her hands. Guess I need to take a step back and let the chips fall where they may and hopefully nothing more serious develops while my husband is away. Telephonic conferenceing is out of the question. I am lucky to get an email once a week due to the nature of his duty.
Thank you all for your responses.

I do think, if the relationship with mom is amicable that she may be agreeable for you to go to the conference to OBSERVE and relay info to dad

also if you can provide the teacher with dad's email address if dad would like to get progress updates or if he has questions for teacher