Student/Counselor Confidentiality

[pschwed]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NJ

My son's school counselor contacted another parent by phone at the end of the school year last year to make sure she was ok with the two children being assigned to the same classroom the following year. To give just a little background, my son and her daughter (now 3rd grade) are very good friends and they play together all the time. The previous year my son had many behavioral problems and was subsequently diagnosed with ADHD. The counselor also told this parent that based on my sons "past" he wanted to make sure she was ok with the friendship and she'd be ok with them being placed in the same classroom. I never received a similar call from the counselor. I wanted to find out if in fact my son's confidentiality had been broken.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[xylene]

Call the counselor ask to discuss the matter.

I'm not exactly sure what the problem is.

It is not confidential that your son has discipline problems

It is not confidential that other students were impacted by them.

It is not confidential that your son is close with this other student.

Just because ADHD is medical diagnosis does not mean that those who work with your son must adopt a posture of plausible deniablity concerning academic discussions of other children.

 

[pschwed]

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to imply that the ADHD diagnosis had anything to do with my concern in general. What bothered me was that he was discussing my son's previous issues with another parent. After the diagnosis, his last year was completely trouble free and there were no more problems, not a single call from his teacher or the principal. By the counselor calling this parent, he's perpetuating this "reputation". That one year will stay with my son for a long time I'm afraid. There are parents that won't let their kids play with my son and it would be much better if the school didn't continue to support that general feeling about him.

 

[Zigner]

The way I see it...the counselor was in a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" type of situation.

 

[Humusluvr]

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to imply that the ADHD diagnosis had anything to do with my concern in general. What bothered me was that he was discussing my son's previous issues with another parent. After the diagnosis, his last year was completely trouble free and there were no more problems, not a single call from his teacher or the principal. By the counselor calling this parent, he's perpetuating this "reputation". That one year will stay with my son for a long time I'm afraid. There are parents that won't let their kids play with my son and it would be much better if the school didn't continue to support that general feeling about him.

I'm actually going to agree with you here. This counselor DID violate student's rights to privacy. The counselor had no right to mention your son by name.

HOWEVER - there is probably little that could be done about it. Even if you brought it up with the principal and the counselor, there would likely be a "Don't do that anymore," given to the counselor, and that's about it. I would also question how you KNOW the conversation occurred the way it did with the other parent.

Would I bring it to the principal's attention? Yes. Would I say that I don't want my son to continue to be stigmatized and that you expect professional behavior out of the counselor? Yes. Absolutely. The counselor WAS unprofessional.

Would I expect the counselor to be fired, or for you to be offered a bunch of money? No. No way.

 

[xylene]

3rd hand hearsay...

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to imply that the ADHD diagnosis had anything to do with my concern in general. What bothered me was that he was discussing my son's previous issues with another parent. After the diagnosis, his last year was completely trouble free and there were no more problems, not a single call from his teacher or the principal. By the counselor calling this parent, he's perpetuating this "reputation". That one year will stay with my son for a long time I'm afraid. There are parents that won't let their kids play with my son and it would be much better if the school didn't continue to support that general feeling about him.

How do you know what the counselor said to this other parent?

How do you know that this other parent or other parents did not raise issues about your son? You admit you son had (has) terrible behavior problems.

Your sons behavior problems are not a secret. In fact they impacted other children severely as you state. So what you are talking about is not confidentiality anymore.

The counselor has to help all the children thrive in school, and humor a slew of parents.

Your son is close to this other parents child. Why are you seeking to have the school have a disinformation campaign against the few parents who support you.

If you want a clean slate, think about a new school.

 

[pschwed]

I know what the counselor said to this other parent because that parent called me and told me right after it happened. She thought the behavior of the counselor was inappropriate and thought I should know.

How do you know that this other parent or other parents did not raise issues about your son? My son has not had any issues in school since 2008. Parents did raise concerns then, that's when we had him diagnosed and the problems went away.

No, his behavior is not a secret and I never said it impacted anyone severlely. He was swearing on the playground and speaking out in class, it didn't involve any physical violence. But again, he has not had any issues in the past year so why is the counselor perpetuating this perception. The parent that was contacted wasn't even aware of any of the previous issues.

I completely agree that the counselor has to help all the children thrive in school, and humor a slew of parents. I certainly wouldn't want his job.

The only thing I want out of this if for the school administrators to stop talking about my son in a negative way to anyone who doesn't need to know. They are perpetuating a problem that was resolved over a year ago and my 8, then 6 year old son continues to pay for it.

Thanks for the positive feedback and support though, really appreciate the help.

 

[IncogAg]

pschwed, you'll have to forgive xylene. He/she seems to assume the worst in your son. I would wholeheartedly agree with humuslover though. Your best bet is not to take this to court, but still should bring it to the prinicipal's attention. If anything, your simple phone call will put a scare into the counselor and he'll hopefully learn his lesson.

 

[HomeGuru]

The way I see it...the counselor was in a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" type of situation.

**A: now dammit, that's a damn good damn response.

 

[Humusluvr]

The only thing I want out of this if for the school administrators to stop talking about my son in a negative way to anyone who doesn't need to know. They are perpetuating a problem that was resolved over a year ago and my 8, then 6 year old son continues to pay for it.

Thanks for the positive feedback and support though, really appreciate the help.

Then, I would tell them exactly that.

"Hey, Mr. Principal and Mr. Counselor. I know there were problems in the past, but they have been resolved and I want us all to put them behind us. Please do not speak about my son to any other parent or student, because I know it is a violation of FERPA. I want any privacy violations to stop. Right now. OK?"

And then you put it behind you, and don't ask the other parent every other week if they have heard anything. Go into school with a smile and shake the principal's hand at parent-teacher night. Pretend it never happened, and things will smooth themselves out.

If they don't, come back here.

 

[xylene]

The only thing I want out of this if for the school administrators to stop talking about my son in a negative way to anyone who doesn't need to know.

See, that is why you are over reacting. The people involved did need to know.

Your son had severe discipline problems and the school spoke to the parents of one of his close playmates about whether they were comfortable with them continuing to be placed together.

The botch-up was not calling you and allowing you to get 3rd hand information.

 

[Humusluvr]

See, that is why you are over reacting. The people involved did need to know.

Your son had severe discipline problems and the school spoke to the parents of one of his close playmates about whether they were comfortable with them continuing to be placed together.

The botch-up was not calling you and allowing you to get 3rd hand information.

The counselor DID violate her son's FERPA rights, however. Very specifically, the counselor is NOT allowed to mention her child by name.

The counselor COULD HAVE said to the other parent, "Is your daughter getting along alright? IS there anyone you do not want her in class with?" The counselor CANNOT mention another student by name, or it is a violation of FERPA.

What pschwed does with the info from here is her decision. She can go in to a conference with the principal and remind the counselor of her son's FERPA rights and be done with it, or she can "over-react," as you put it. I don't think she is overreacting unless she is saying she wants to sue, and then that would just be dumb.

 

[IncogAg]

Absolutely no overreacting on pschwed's part. You responded as any parent would... and much better than many. Follow what Humuslover is telling you and everything should take its course in a much more positive manner.

 

[xylene]

The counselor CANNOT mention another student by name, or it is a violation of FERPA.

In this statement, you are promulgating a stricter construction of the FERPA rules than the current federal guidelines.

Electronic Code of Federal Regulations:

This is why, while I agree, most strenuously, that a discourse needs to occur between the parents of this child and the administration and this counselor, I do not agree that an allegation of privacy violation (since it is weak as provided by the law and law guidlines) provides a position of strength for these parents to leverage themselves as if the child had a clear behavioral health past.

 

[Humusluvr]

In this statement, you are promulgating a stricter construction of the FERPA rules than the current federal guidelines.

Electronic Code of Federal Regulations:

This is why, while I agree, most strenuously, that a discourse needs to occur between the parents of this child and the administration and this counselor, I do not agree that an allegation of privacy violation (since it is weak as provided by the law and law guidlines) provides a position of strength for these parents to leverage themselves as if the child had a clear behavioral health past.

Where does it say in there that it is fine to discuss behavioral issues of one child with ANOTHER child's parents?

No, no, no. You don't talk about a child's issues, problems, educational path, anything with anyone other than the parents of THAT KID. That is a violation of that child's privacy.

Imagine the ramifications if your counselor could talk openly about other students to one kid';s parents?

Situation A - Counselor tells Annie's parents that Becky is picking on her in the hall. Annie's parents decide to go down the block and confront Becky's parents, fight ensues, police are called. How did Annie's parents find out about this issue? Oh, the counselor told them. sue.

Situation B - Counselor tells Jim's parent that he has been involved in rough play with Paul. Parent decides to kick Paul's dad's butt for his kid beating up on Jim.

All of these situations, and I could think of a thousand more, where the counselor gives out information on another student who is harming someone else's kid ends with violence or phone calls or fighting and drama.