summer camp

[smom]

What is the name of your state? WA

Is summer camp considered an extra curricular activity? We wanted to send my stepdaughter (his daughter) to camp this summer while she was visiting us this summer. Her mom has flipped out and is demanding all the information for us before she will "agree to let us".

It's a joint legal custody situation. The mom does this kind of thing all the time - I personally think she can't control this decision it doesn't impact her time, and also because there is nothing mentioned in the plan about it.

Any thoughts?

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state? WA

Is summer camp considered an extra curricular activity? We wanted to send my stepdaughter (his daughter) to camp this summer while she was visiting us this summer. Her mom has flipped out and is demanding all the information for us before she will "agree to let us".

It's a joint legal custody situation. The mom does this kind of thing all the time - I personally think she can't control this decision it doesn't impact her time, and also because there is nothing mentioned in the plan about it.

Any thoughts?

She has a right to know about the summer camp. Is there a ROFR in the court order? You by the way have no say so.

 

[lmgutierrez07]

well...... i think you are right in thinking she dosent have much say so. i think she cant tell your husband( the father) what to do with his vistitaion time. i have been in the same situation, but i am the mom. we live in texas,though. so really i am not sure what your state laws are. i didnt freak out...... but i did want to know where my kids were going to be. in our decree it states that if our kiddos are not going to be with him, he needs to let me know where they are going to be. (which he never does) so maybe dad needs to just tell his ex where the camp is going to be so she dosent worry about their daughter. (note i said dad needs to tell his ex. i am not much on interferience when it comes down to the kids)

 

[Silverplum]

well...... i think you are right in thinking she dosent have much say so. i think she cant tell your husband( the father) what to do with his vistitaion time. i have been in the same situation, but i am the mom. we live in texas,though. so really i am not sure what your state laws are. i didnt freak out...... but i did want to know where my kids were going to be. in our decree it states that if our kiddos are not going to be with him, he needs to let me know where they are going to be. (which he never does) so maybe dad needs to just tell his ex where the camp is going to be so she dosent worry about their daughter. (note i said dad needs to tell his ex. i am not much on interferience when it comes down to the kids)

Well...

 

[smom]

She has a right to know about the summer camp. Is there a ROFR in the court order? You by the way have no say so.

No ROFR.

I know I don't have a say, I just wanted an second opinion before he asks his attorney about it.

And obviously she already knows about the summer camp since she's flipping out about it so it isn't really a big secret or anything.

 

[jbowman]

Hmmm to keep the peace, why dont you just give mom all the info? Whats the big deal?

 

[Ohiogal]

No ROFR.

I know I don't have a say, I just wanted an second opinion before he asks his attorney about it.

And obviously she already knows about the summer camp since she's flipping out about it so it isn't really a big secret or anything.

next question: is mom expected to do any driving for the camp OR pay for any of it? What kind of camp is it? Skydiving camp? Or church camp where you sit in a circle and sing songs?

 

[mommyof4]

Regardless of the legal answer, it is common courtesty to give the mother the information about the camp. (which you indicate there is no ROFR, so if Dad wants to sign her up for camp AND pay for it himself AND handle all the transportation and details, he can).

So, she doesn't give Dad the information. Tell your husband to be the bigger person.

This isn't that hard.

 

[jbowman]

Aside from just common courtesy (I think you should just give the info) I wonder what happened to the answer that we normally hear? "If there is nothing in the court order, mom has no right to dictate what dad does on his time. " This seems like the standard answer. Is WA different? OP stated that this will be during dad's summer visitation time.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

What I am sensing is that mom must "approve" of something that is on dad's time. If all mom is asking is to know the information, then yes, provide it. If mom gets to say "yea" or "nay", that another story when it is dad footing the bill on HIS time.

 

[mommyof4]

Aside from just common courtesy (I think you should just give the info) I wonder what happened to the answer that we normally hear? "If there is nothing in the court order, mom has no right to dictate what dad does on his time. " This seems like the standard answer. Is WA different? OP stated that this will be during dad's summer visitation time.

That's what I just said. I just didn't spell it out in those exact words.

 

[jbowman]

That's what I just said. I just didn't spell it out in those exact words.

Sorry, Mommyof4, I didnt see what you posted before I did.

 

[LdiJ]

Again, what kind of summer camp is this?

If its daycamp in lieu of child care, then its probably none of mom's business at all. If its sleep away camp then that's a whole 'nother story....and lots more details are needed.

 

[Ohiogal]

There is a legal aspect to it. Because the answer is normally what dad does on his time is his business so long as it does NOT put the child into harms way. So again I ask, is this skydiving camp or singing songs camp? Who provides the child's medical insurance? Does the child have medical issues?