Summer School

[luvisabattle]

Washington

Our daughter's teacher has recommended our daughter for summer school. Our particular district has a lot of private funding, and this has not been cut by the budget shortfall like most of the school districts in our state. We still have to pay for it, but it is available.

The father and I have joint decision making and I can not enroll her until he agrees. He has our daughter from June 17th to Aug 31 accept for everyother weekend, one weekday evening and vacation time. He does not want to allow our daughter to be enrolled in our school district because it is a 15 mile drive for him even though I said she could go during my vacation time. He suggested a Sylvan Learning Center in his area.

Back story - we've had the current parenting plan for two years and for the past two years the father has not allowed me all of my vacation time during the summer and I'm sure has no intention of letting me this summer.

My question - What is your thoughts on how I should handle this? I would rather our duaghter be in school than in front of the TV or being her little brother's entertainment provider for the entire summer but I'm biased.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Zigner]

Washington

Our daughter's teacher has recommended our daughter for summer school. Our particular district has a lot of private funding, and this has not been cut by the budget shortfall like most of the school districts in our state. We still have to pay for it, but it is available.

The father and I have joint decision making and I can not enroll her until he agrees. He has our daughter from June 17th to Aug 31 accept for everyother weekend, one weekday evening and vacation time. He does not want to allow our daughter to be enrolled in our school district because it is a 15 mile drive for him even though I said she could go during my vacation time. He suggested a Sylvan Learning Center in his area.

Back story - we've had the current parenting plan for two years and for the past two years the father has not allowed me all of my vacation time during the summer and I'm sure has no intention of letting me this summer.

My question - What is your thoughts on how I should handle this? I would rather our duaghter be in school than in front of the TV or being her little brother's entertainment provider for the entire summer but I'm biased.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Do you have a reason that you DON'T want to use Sylvan?

 

[txmom512]

All I can say is if you do choose Sylvan, make sure dad is covering the cost 100% - it's Ridiculously expensive!! (I looked into it for dd when she was struggling in math)

Not to mention, you sometimes have trouble scheduling your child in a way that is not very inconvenient to you. And they don't have bus service, etc. like most schools do for summer school, so there's also the schedule & transportation thing to worry about.

 

[nextwife]

Is a similar summer school offered in his district?

 

[Zigner]

All I can say is if you do choose Sylvan, make sure dad is covering the cost 100% - it's Ridiculously expensive!! (I looked into it for dd when she was struggling in math)

Not to mention, you sometimes have trouble scheduling your child in a way that is not very inconvenient to you. And they don't have bus service, etc. like most schools do for summer school, so there's also the schedule & transportation thing to worry about.

Why shouldn't mom be expected to pay at least what she would have paid for the district?

 

[luvisabattle]

The closest Sylvan to him is the same distance as our school district.

Coincidently his aunt works for the school district we are in, and sent the letter of recommendation to us. It's a small area and tight nit. I feel like our daugter would get the most out of thier program.

 

[mistoffolees]

Washington

Our daughter's teacher has recommended our daughter for summer school. Our particular district has a lot of private funding, and this has not been cut by the budget shortfall like most of the school districts in our state. We still have to pay for it, but it is available.

The father and I have joint decision making and I can not enroll her until he agrees. He has our daughter from June 17th to Aug 31 accept for everyother weekend, one weekday evening and vacation time. He does not want to allow our daughter to be enrolled in our school district because it is a 15 mile drive for him even though I said she could go during my vacation time. He suggested a Sylvan Learning Center in his area.

Back story - we've had the current parenting plan for two years and for the past two years the father has not allowed me all of my vacation time during the summer and I'm sure has no intention of letting me this summer.

My question - What is your thoughts on how I should handle this? I would rather our duaghter be in school than in front of the TV or being her little brother's entertainment provider for the entire summer but I'm biased.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

You need to back up and explain why the teacher recommended summer school. Is the child failing courses? All I see is that his aunt thinks the kid would benefit from summer school. That hardly seems like something I'd want to create a legal battle over.

As a very general rule, Dad's time is inviolate. If he doesn't want to take the kid to summer school, he doesn't have to, barring a court order. If it is absolutely essential for the child's development, you might get a court order, but until then, he doesn't have to agree.

Yet it seems like he IS willing to consider summer school - at an accredited school that's convenient to him rather than one that's convenient to you (even if the distance is the same, he considers Sylvan to be a better choice for his circumstances). Since it's his parenting time, that is entirely reasonable. You'd need a pretty darned strong objection to overrule his willingness to use Sylvan.

 

[luvisabattle]

Our duaghter is struggling in school. She was tested for Special Ed a few months ago. She came out average. 99 is average and she tested 102 - 107, but is still behind because our district teaches above average.

She has no motivation - hates school and also struggles with low self-esteem. We live in a district where the majority of the children have Tiger Mom's and it's no joke. She's missed a lot of the key knowledge from 1st and 2nd grade and it's not popular to not excell in her class.

She's had a lot of emotional turmoil in her life for the past three years and it effected every aspect including focusing in school.

Her father originally had only the month of August in the summers, but I agreed when our pp was modified that he could have the entire summer as long as I had four weeks for vacation time during the three months and she would be enrolled in camps. He agreed, but when the summer came I was not allowed the vacation time, and he refused to let me enroll her in a camp saying it was too expensive.

By the way Sylvan is twice as expensive for less time with a teacher than the summer school program in our district.

 

[Zigner]

Our duaghter is struggling in school. She was tested for Special Ed a few months ago. She came out average. 99 is average and she tested 102 - 107, but is still behind because our district teaches above average.

She has no motivation - hates school and also struggles with low self-esteem. We live in a district where the majority of the children have Tiger Mom's and it's no joke. She's missed a lot of the key knowledge from 1st and 2nd grade and it's not popular to not excell in her class.

She's had a lot of emotional turmoil in her life for the past three years and it effected every aspect including focusing in school.

Her father originally had only the month of August in the summers, but I agreed when our pp was modified that he could have the entire summer as long as I had four weeks for vacation time during the three months and she would be enrolled in camps. He agreed, but when the summer came I was not allowed the vacation time, and he refused to let me enroll her in a camp saying it was too expensive.

By the way Sylvan is twice as expensive for less time with a teacher than the summer school program in our district.

Your daughter hates school and lacks motivation...so you want to send her right back to school over the summer instead of an alternative that may actually work better for her?

 

[luvisabattle]

What's the alternative? What ever would be best is what I want for her, her teacher has recommended that this would be best - I'm looking for input.

She's my only child and I'm new to this. Any advice is helpful.

 

[Proserpina]

Your daughter hates school and lacks motivation...so you want to send her right back to school over the summer instead of an alternative that may actually work better for her?

I tend to agree with this.

I do know that Sylvan is generally a great choice for kids like this; however without knowing exactly where Mom wants to send kiddo it's hard to make a comparison.

OTOH, it appears that counseling/therapy is far more necessary than extra schooling at this point. I don't remember off the top of my head if that's already ongoing.

 

[Zigner]

What's the alternative?

Sylvan. It's a non-school approach to learning.

And, I agree with the suggestion for counseling.

 

[luvisabattle]

yes, she's been in therapy since October. It's been really great for her. Her therapist is completely against being involved with the mom/dad drama and has made it clear (to father's attorney) that she does not participate in the legal side of our conflict.

she did make a cps report about the father's teenaged step-son.

 

[mistoffolees]

What's the alternative? What ever would be best is what I want for her, her teacher has recommended that this would be best - I'm looking for input.

She's my only child and I'm new to this. Any advice is helpful.

Your child is average intelligence, but is underperforming. That means that the problem is not likely to be solved with summer school. (Granted, if she's actually failed a course, summer school might be necessary so she doesn't fall behind, but that's not what you said).

Talk with your school counselor. Talk with some other teachers. Read some books. There are ways to motivate kids without holding summer school over their head. In fact, it might be that you would tell her that she's going to have to go to summer school UNLESS she improves.

I don't think you're going to be able to shove this down your ex's throat.

 

[Antigone*]

I think mom needs to allow dad to have his parenting time with his daughter as ordered by the court. After all, summer school is a "recommendation" and not a requirement.

It almost looks to me like mom is trying to find something to get between dad and daughter time together.