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Types of Proof for Custody Court?

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What is the name of your state? CA

I'd like to know what I need to take to court with me when I attempt to modify my custody order. I have a log of all my visits since the current order started, highlighting the last month when I had my son most every night due to his father's seeming drug induced dementia. (It's easy to get a lot of visitation when he's in that vulnerable state.)

I also logged the incidents when visitation was interrupted or denied, derogatory or threatening phone calls, etc. Does any of this really matter?

Should I bring reference letters on my behalf or witness statements from his negative activities?

Thanks for your feedback.

Whyte Noise

Senior Member
What continuing, substantial change of circumstance has happened to warrant a change of custody?

The things that you have mentioned, don't.


Back to MissouriGal

In your reply to my post you posed the question and the comment:

"What continuing, substantial change of circumstance has happened to warrant a change of custody?

The things that you have mentioned, don't."

The biggest change is I have completed an alcohol rehab program and have a permanent residence. Both were stipulations in my March 2003 parenting plan. The things I mentioned in my post that were negative about my son's father's recent behavior were also mentioned in a declaration to a Motion to Show Cause. I haven't filed that yet, as I am beginning to understand that discounting the other parent isn't such a good idea in the Court's eyes.

Is it harmful to mention, however, that certain needs are not being met such as homework not being done at all, tardiness to school, missing scheduled school events, ADD meds are forgotten, etc?

Should I begin gathering reference letters on my behalf or is this wasted effort?

Thank you!


Senior Member
"Reference letters?" No, I don't think they will help.

As for the rest, if the child is not thriving in his or her current environment, and you have proof, that can be brought up in court.

How long has he had custody?


Types of Proof for Custody Court

My son's father has had custody since May, and although we have a parenting plan stipulation with scheduled visits, we usually agree on extra time, overnights, etc. It's when he gets mad at me and states "In the order it says....so you have to bring the boy home..." The circumstances may be that my boy is already bathed and in bed, and his father calls in the middle of the night wanting him to come home. Very unreasonable.

Additionally, I mentioned in previous posts my son's father was going to court on 4 misdemeanor charges. He was convicted on all 4 counts today and sentenced to 2 years county jail. 180 days is suspended, however, and he has to do 90 days in custody. He's applying for electronic monitoring (house arrest). Could any of this be an advantage to me in custody court?

I got my modification packet ready and my mediation scheduled. I'll file on Monday. There's room for a declaration in the packet and my take from this forum is that any negatives I state in writing about my son's father's lifestyle or recent dealings with his flakey and disruptive behavior are irrelevant. Correct?

Thank you!

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