Unusual case:

[delilahjed]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Missouri

Here it is:

I am married to a practicing Narcassist. He moves my things..hides my things and then returns my things all while being Mr.Wonderful. As of late,
he was diagnosed with cancer, thus heithening the entire issue of moving things and so on, we counseled, he admitted everything now he is back in
denial. He had his OP, APR..Abdominal Perenial Resection, quite serious to say the least. I thought for sure this would humble the old boy and our
lives may actually return to some kind of normalicy as I was there for him day in and day out through this cancer ordeal. It did not, six weeks
later the ill behavior showed up again and I had to get out of there. I am a diabetic/blood pressure afflicted person myself. My BP was through
the roof and horrible headaches from this on going behavior. Please dont ask why it took 20 years, I was passive and loving, I guess he saw me coming,
now I am more aggressive and assertive, I guess you really do teach a person how to treat you. I move out, we agreed on this, he wanted me out of there.
The last two weeks of our lives he wasnt even around, gone two weekends in a row, coming home late at night, and you would think a man with a permanent
colostomy bad would be settled down and realize what he has. I have worked hard, maintenance several homes, and kept myself attractive all to wake
up to this nightmare after all these years. We agreed for me to leave, I told him I would still help him through his cancer, however, his last words to
me were to F-OFF. I was torn. I was being mentally tortured. Before I left, we had a war, things were broken, abuse happen and I had to get out of
there. He is 6'3, I am 5'2, so I did fear him, he was out of control. He taped me when we were at war. Dont know if its a big deal or not. My daughter
found his original facebook page he created after I left, I was completely shocked on the findings
beings we attended church for 19 years of our life together.

Apparently someone informed him that you could see his friends, so he changed it all up, added the Christian friends while forgetting to delete
all of the women he is acutally following, so in my defense, a friend told me to take pictures of that and log it all. I did but I dont care about that.
I care about this, he went to our pastor and told him things that were not true, the pastor then said to him he can divorce me, I abandoned him.
I was hurt by this because we agreed on my leaving, it was not safe any longer to live together. I am not presently seeking a divorce, I do not want
another relationship at all, I want my sanity back and my peace. I am damaged goods for the moment but working hard to repair the years the locust have
eaten. I am in Missour, can this man take me off his insurance? I went to our insurance site, Coventry Insurance, but cannot fill out the form
because it sais we already have an account, yes we do, but my husband changed all the passwords and its all in his email only now. I am timid to call
Coventry for fear they may see our separation as a divorce and cut me off and or allow for my husband to cut me off come time. I was finally able
to get down to two days a week to work only, and now I am being forced to work full time again. I almost died in 1990 from viral pnuemonia, I have
a healed trac and have had many physical problems over the years but continued to clean homes until my fingers were blue and could not clean anymore.
This is just some of this story, I am still in shock trying to pull the peices together on what the heck happened to this man to do such horrible
acts of mental abuse to me and our life together. I am only 51, but I am worn down. I presently have a place to live and working hard to maintain my life
as I once knew it. Two questions: What about retirement? if this man pursues a divorce, am I to settle for what his income is right now as
far as his pension or can I wait until he retires and bid for that? beleive me, I have worked hard for our life together, and found he was spending
money like there was no tomorrow, nothing I can do about it now, water under the bridge. I am trying to protect myself, where do I start?
Can I bid for the retirment he has coming later in life? What about the insurance? how can I protect myself calling this company when I cannot
even get into the site because my husband has changed the passwords and not co-operating at all. Its a mess. Any help will be greatly
appreciated.

 

[stealth2]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Missouri

Here it is:

I am married to a practicing Narcassist. He moves my things..hides my things and then returns my things all while being Mr.Wonderful. As of late,
he was diagnosed with cancer, thus heithening the entire issue of moving things and so on, we counseled, he admitted everything now he is back in
denial. He had his OP, APR..Abdominal Perenial Resection, quite serious to say the least. I thought for sure this would humble the old boy and our
lives may actually return to some kind of normalicy as I was there for him day in and day out through this cancer ordeal. It did not, six weeks
later the ill behavior showed up again and I had to get out of there. I am a diabetic/blood pressure afflicted person myself. My BP was through
the roof and horrible headaches from this on going behavior. Please dont ask why it took 20 years, I was passive and loving, I guess he saw me coming,
now I am more aggressive and assertive, I guess you really do teach a person how to treat you. I move out, we agreed on this, he wanted me out of there.
The last two weeks of our lives he wasnt even around, gone two weekends in a row, coming home late at night, and you would think a man with a permanent
colostomy bad would be settled down and realize what he has. I have worked hard, maintenance several homes, and kept myself attractive all to wake
up to this nightmare after all these years. We agreed for me to leave, I told him I would still help him through his cancer, however, his last words to
me were to F-OFF. I was torn. I was being mentally tortured. Before I left, we had a war, things were broken, abuse happen and I had to get out of
there. He is 6'3, I am 5'2, so I did fear him, he was out of control. He taped me when we were at war. Dont know if its a big deal or not. My daughter
found his original facebook page he created after I left, I was completely shocked on the findings
beings we attended church for 19 years of our life together.

Apparently someone informed him that you could see his friends, so he changed it all up, added the Christian friends while forgetting to delete
all of the women he is acutally following, so in my defense, a friend told me to take pictures of that and log it all. I did but I dont care about that.
I care about this, he went to our pastor and told him things that were not true, the pastor then said to him he can divorce me, I abandoned him.
I was hurt by this because we agreed on my leaving, it was not safe any longer to live together. I am not presently seeking a divorce, I do not want
another relationship at all, I want my sanity back and my peace. I am damaged goods for the moment but working hard to repair the years the locust have
eaten. I am in Missour, can this man take me off his insurance? I went to our insurance site, Coventry Insurance, but cannot fill out the form
because it sais we already have an account, yes we do, but my husband changed all the passwords and its all in his email only now. I am timid to call
Coventry for fear they may see our separation as a divorce and cut me off and or allow for my husband to cut me off come time. I was finally able
to get down to two days a week to work only, and now I am being forced to work full time again. I almost died in 1990 from viral pnuemonia, I have
a healed trac and have had many physical problems over the years but continued to clean homes until my fingers were blue and could not clean anymore.
This is just some of this story, I am still in shock trying to pull the peices together on what the heck happened to this man to do such horrible
acts of mental abuse to me and our life together. I am only 51, but I am worn down. I presently have a place to live and working hard to maintain my life
as I once knew it. Two questions: What about retirement? if this man pursues a divorce, am I to settle for what his income is right now as
far as his pension or can I wait until he retires and bid for that? beleive me, I have worked hard for our life together, and found he was spending
money like there was no tomorrow, nothing I can do about it now, water under the bridge. I am trying to protect myself, where do I start?
Can I bid for the retirment he has coming later in life? What about the insurance? how can I protect myself calling this company when I cannot
even get into the site because my husband has changed the passwords and not co-operating at all. Its a mess. Any help will be greatly
appreciated.

Please reformat that to be more legible. It is very difficult to read in its current form. Thanks.

 

[delilahjed]

Hello, are you kidding me here? its quite legible.

I already at one time logged in, wrote my story and when I went to post it, the entire matter disappeared. So it was created in notepad and unless one cannot understand English, I am not sure what the issue is. I did a copy and paste and I can read it very clearly..sorry you cannot, I guess you will help me or choose otherwise, sorry about the formatting, I dont want to chance it and lose it all again. Perhaps another may help? thank you ahead of time.

 

[anearthw]

Legible meaning to remove the extraneous information and provide basic facts. While it is appreciated that the subject is emotional for you, this is a legal website.

Is there a reason you have not filed for divorce? If you are unwilling to call the insurance office "timid" as you describe, then you should probably seek out a local family attorney to guide you through this.

 

[Silverplum]

You can google up some basic info on divorce (in your state ONLY) and get an idea of what you're facing.

I agree that your post is too long and full of excess emotional info. When you deal with an attorney, you'll be paying for his/her time. It would benefit you to learn to cut your story down to basic questions. Good luck.

 

[single317dad]

I am married to a practicing Narcassist[sic].

So is your husband.

 

[Eekamouse]

Blam! You hit that nail on the head! Sheesh!

 

[LdiJ]

Hello, are you kidding me here? its quite legible.

I already at one time logged in, wrote my story and when I went to post it, the entire matter disappeared. So it was created in notepad and unless one cannot understand English, I am not sure what the issue is. I did a copy and paste and I can read it very clearly..sorry you cannot, I guess you will help me or choose otherwise, sorry about the formatting, I dont want to chance it and lose it all again. Perhaps another may help? thank you ahead of time.

Bottom line, its clear that you need an attorney.

 

[stealth2]

Hello, are you kidding me here? its quite legible.

I already at one time logged in, wrote my story and when I went to post it, the entire matter disappeared. So it was created in notepad and unless one cannot understand English, I am not sure what the issue is. I did a copy and paste and I can read it very clearly..sorry you cannot, I guess you will help me or choose otherwise, sorry about the formatting, I dont want to chance it and lose it all again. Perhaps another may help? thank you ahead of time.

Then feel free to pay a lawyer for advice. Seriously. I ask nicely, and get this snark? SMH.

 

[delilahjed]

Legible meaning to remove the extraneous information and provide basic facts. While it is appreciated that the subject is emotional for you, this is a legal website.

Is there a reason you have not filed for divorce? If you are unwilling to call the insurance office "timid" as you describe, then you should probably seek out a local family attorney to guide you through this.

Hello anearthw..

Thank you for your response. I have not filed because I dont see the necessity at the moment beings he has cancer and I have offered to help him through it. He is prideful, I wont hear from him. However, I am in no hurry, I figured it he wanted out, then he can file, I dont want that monkey on my back and paining my heart when it was not me who thrusted us into this mess but his on going ill behavior, so I am opting to stay low until he himself files. I am timid to make that call because I read on line that some insurance companies treat separations like a divorce, so we are presently separated so in this I thought to leave well enough alone. However, I would like to see some answers.

 

[delilahjed]

Bottom line, its clear that you need an attorney.

Hello, thank you for your response, it is clear I will eventually need an attorney, but, I came here while searching the net educating myself as much as possible, to me the net can be a wealth of information, that of a library if you will. So I started here in hopes to have a little more insight as to exactly what I need to know.

 

[delilahjed]

Then feel free to pay a lawyer for advice. Seriously. I ask nicely, and get this snark? SMH.

Hello stealth..

I didnt mean to step on your toes by any means and forgive my being out of step with my terms, but I was just making a point, however, thank you for trying to help me, its why I came here to get help, any help is good help and you seem to have heart.

 

[delilahjed]

You can google up some basic info on divorce (in your state ONLY) and get an idea of what you're facing.

I agree that your post is too long and full of excess emotional info. When you deal with an attorney, you'll be paying for his/her time. It would benefit you to learn to cut your story down to basic questions. Good luck.

Thank you very much Silverplum..

Yes my post is my heart, just was trying to give the direction of my life so as to understand my question, I guess it was too long. Thank you though, its appreciated.

 

[delilahjed]

Bottom line, its clear that you need an attorney.

Hello LDi

I am sure this is but the truth, thank you for your prompt response.

 

[Proserpina]

Apparently gentle hints are not being heard. Allow me to try one more time.

You either:

Leave the emotion outside, give us the relevant facts and ask your question or...

Pay an attorney to wade through it.

English isn't your first language, is it?