Violating a CO

[doc2b]

What is the name of your state? Michigan

Hubby found out that his ex violated the CO and began smoking during her parenting time again. He has no physical proof, he was just told by his little one that she found her mom smoking at home, and they have been stinking to high heaven for a couple of weeks now when they come over here. (She and her brother know that there is to be no smoking around them during parenting time, per the CO, because they both have asthma like illnesses and it aggravates it). Hubby emailed her and said he was aware of this and that she needed to stop. Never mentioned court or filing a motion because he has no proof that this is occurring. His ex fired back at him that she "assures" him that she is in compliance with the CO (she thinks she found a loophole in the wording that makes it okay to smoke), but that she is positive that the judge will be more concerned with what goes on over here (she's anticipating a court date?). Such as making the kids eat foods they don't like, letting the little girl wear her brothers jeans to play in-ridiculous stuff. She basically lets on that she'll do as she wants regarding the smoking when the kids are with her, and never denies doing it.

I guess hubby is torn because she has a total disregard for this part of the CO, but has no proof to file a motion with the court to try and make her realize that this is a serious concern for him. Without proof, should he file anyway? If he doesn't, being aware of the situation, he looks like it's no big deal to him either. If he files, can he include a complete copy of the email that went between him and his ex to the court?
He doesn't want to make a deal out of petty things, but feels this is something that needs to be addressed and, since his daughter has risked getting in trouble with mom for telling him, feels a responsibility to her to do something about it.

Any advice for him? Thanks again for help.

 

[Zephyr]

just keep documenting through email...every time the children smell like smoke he should send her and email.....it's not proof that she's smoking but it does create a trail that he is trying to address it

 

[doc2b]

Thanks, I'll tell him to keep doing that. It just gets to the point that you wonder what the CO is for in the first place if you can't really enforce it...
And, the kids don't really smell like smoke anymore since she started dousing them in Febreeze on their way out the door...so there goes that.

I think, after 2 years of saving emails and journal writing, hubby finally has enough for a book. He can call it "My Post-Divorce Autobiography: The Early Years". Of course, no one would buy it...

 

[Zephyr]

Thanks, I'll tell him to keep doing that. It just gets to the point that you wonder what the CO is for in the first place if you can't really enforce it...
And, the kids don't really smell like smoke anymore since she started dousing them in Febreeze on their way out the door...so there goes that.

I think, after 2 years of saving emails and journal writing, hubby finally has enough for a book. He can call it "My Post-Divorce Autobiography: The Early Years". Of course, no one would buy it...

THEY WOULDN'T.... cause unfortunately they all already know the story......