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Visitation Rights

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H

hunny

Guest
i have joint legal custody of my three children. iowa laws would apply. our divorce decree says that he has resonable visitation rights with permission and 24 hours notice. at the time of our divorce we were both living in the same city in iowa. i have since moved to omaha. he was not happy that i moved and asked me to wait 6 months. i refused and was gone in two months. since our move i have driven back to iowa to drop the kids off every other friday. and drove back again that sunday to pick them up so that he could spend time with them. i am no longer willing to do this. what rights does he have since we have already moved and he didn't legaly do anything about it when i told him i was moving 8 months ago. and actually moved 6 months ago. is there a time limit? can he make me drive the kids both ways to see him since i'm the one that moved away? I'm not denying him access to the children after all. he can come here and pick them up when ever he wants to (resonably and with 24 hours notice) right?????
 


S

Snoopy

Guest
hunny said:
i have joint legal custody of my three children. iowa laws would apply. our divorce decree says that he has resonable visitation rights with permission and 24 hours notice. at the time of our divorce we were both living in the same city in iowa. i have since moved to omaha. he was not happy that i moved and asked me to wait 6 months. i refused and was gone in two months. since our move i have driven back to iowa to drop the kids off every other friday. and drove back again that sunday to pick them up so that he could spend time with them. i am no longer willing to do this. what rights does he have since we have already moved and he didn't legaly do anything about it when i told him i was moving 8 months ago. and actually moved 6 months ago. is there a time limit? can he make me drive the kids both ways to see him since i'm the one that moved away? I'm not denying him access to the children after all. he can come here and pick them up when ever he wants to (resonably and with 24 hours notice) right?????
So you pull the children away from the father. Do all the driving to keep him happy and then when enough time has gone by, told him to get lost!

If he has any sense, he will petition the court and make you pay for all visitation related expenses. However, since he has done nothing so far, then yes, you will get away with slowly destroying the relationship between the father and children. Well done!
 
H

hunny

Guest
To Snoopy

QUOTE]

So you pull the children away from the father. Do all the driving to keep him happy and then when enough time has gone by, told him to get lost!

If he has any sense, he will petition the court and make you pay for all visitation related expenses. However, since he has done nothing so far, then yes, you will get away with slowly destroying the relationship between the father and children. Well done! [/B][/QUOTE]

You bast--d! How dare you judge me! You didn't even bother to ask why I wasn't willing to take them to his doorstep on his every whim. He is neglecting the children's safety and has resulted in their injury on more than one occasion. I am no longer willing to subject the children to his stupid behavior!!!!!! I am infact having him investigated by Child Protective Services at this very moment!!! But guess who is in contempt of court if I deny him access to the children. ME! And guess who ends up paying for it. Twin 6 year old girls and an 8 year old boy.

And to suggest that I would willingly and happily take the kids away from their father, you disgust me! I want nothing more than for the kids to have a decent and safe relationship with their father. And yes, I have bent over backwards to keep him happy. How come it is all my responsibility to make sure he sees his children? I don't think there is anything wrong with an adult man taking his own responsibility to see his own kids.

If you had any sense, you would pull your head out of your _ss and shut the hell up before you belittle someone like me again.
 
B

BugHogan

Guest
You have to understand that in your original post, it sounded like you were simply tired of driving and didn't want to do it any longer after you were the one who chose to move far away. You didn't explain your reasons. Some custodial parents purposely and intentionally frustrate visitation, which ends up only hurting the kids in the long run. So the issue is a sensitive one with many here.

Many times if a custodial parent moves, the judge will order them to pick up the lion's share of visitation costs, barring special circumstances. The same goes if the NCP moves, they pick up the tab for visitation.

How is he endangering the children? If it's a safety issue, I would think you'd feel better driving them yourself. Or if he actually is endangering the children, would you really want them to visit him unsupervised anyways? Is modifying the existing visitation an option if he is being neglectful? Forgive me, not trying to be rude, I don't know the situation and I'm not trying to judge at all, just trying to understand.

 
T

Thummper

Guest
Ok, the children in question happen to be my God children. I'm here to support hunny for what she is doing. The problem here is that the legal systems in Iowa refuse to take her case in trying to secure SUPERVISED visitation. The father in this case is a know it all who doesn't want to take responsibility for his actions on behalf of the children. Now, with that said, if he were the father of my kids, I'd refuse to let him see them until he grew up and could stop doing things such as tossing them 15 feet from a boat to shore where they land on their heads and have to be seen at the dr's office or like shooting his son in the foot and having his son have major surgery to remove the bullet from the bone it was lodged into. The state is doing NOTHING to protect these children and I for one am appalled by it and embarassed to admit that I live in Iowa! And yes, all reports have been turned in to the local Child Protective Services, but do they do anything? Can you believe they UNFOUNDED the case?????
 
H

hunny

Guest
BugHogan

BugHogan said:
You have to understand that in your original post, it sounded like you were simply tired of driving and didn't want to do it any longer after you were the one who chose to move far away. You didn't explain your reasons. Some custodial parents purposely and intentionally frustrate visitation, which ends up only hurting the kids in the long run. So the issue is a sensitive one with many here.

Many times if a custodial parent moves, the judge will order them to pick up the lion's share of visitation costs, barring special circumstances. The same goes if the NCP moves, they pick up the tab for visitation.

How is he endangering the children? If it's a safety issue, I would think you'd feel better driving them yourself. Or if he actually is endangering the children, would you really want them to visit him unsupervised anyways? Is modifying the existing visitation an option if he is being neglectful? Forgive me, not trying to be rude, I don't know the situation and I'm not trying to judge at all, just trying to understand.

I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to be that rude. it just made me mad that snoopy was so quick to judge me. I didn't include all the details because I really thought that 1. it wasn't that relevant to my questions and 2. because it was kinda a private matter. I'm scared to death that CPI will somehow say that I wasn't doing everything possible to protect my kids and take them away from me as well.
 
B

BugHogan

Guest
In my experience, Child Protective Services is a mess, no matter what state you live in. They seem to do everything BUT protect children.

Shooting the son in the foot sounds terrible. I can't believe they haven't questioned the behavior of this guy either if he is doing these things.

You may want to look into retaining an attorney if you can afford it or looking around at state aid in your area for legal representation. This guy sounds like a moron and he should have supervised visitation if he is endangering and injuring the children this way.

Hopefully one of the lawyers on here will have advice for you.
 

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