visitation

[frank2345]

Cook County ,Illinois
My divorce agreement states that my ex and I split sitter's costs when she works and that I have the right to visitation once during the week and every other weekend. My ex says that a recent ruling says that if I do not take the kids during that time I am solely responsible for sitters costs. Is that true?
I believe that the custodial parent is responsible for watching or providing sitters in the event the non custodial parent cannot watch the kids. This has not been a problem nor a habit but has happened such as I had the kids Christmas Eve so I said I wouldn't see the kids until the following weekend and she blew up stating that I must watch or pay all sitters costs.

 

[deefran]

AHHH, good ole' Cook County IL...how I've missed it.

If there was a different ruling on the issue of daycare costs...were you there, informed of court date???? If so, what do your court papers state??? If not, could be she's pulling your leg about the whole thing...or you need to contact your courthouse to get a copy of recent ruling.

I have a difficult time understanding though as to why it is HER job to find a sitter during YOUR visitation time...Perhaps she went to court to have your visitation modified if you were an infrequent visitor and she got sick of paying daycare costs when it was your time to have them....just a thought...can't really expand more on this seems too much has been left out of post.

 

[frank2345]

No modification was made to visitation. She just said that her attorney advise her of a recent ruling, made within the last 5 years. As far as visitation, I do stick to my visitation, every other weekend and once during the week. And my three kids and I enjoy these visitations. However I try to get a heads up on issues that surface because she has access to a very good attorney that represents for free. If I get sick or cannot watch the kids I do not believe I, the non-custodial parent, am responsible for the obtaining or paying for sitters.
Also she feels that on my weekends she can just change the schedule with some notice me to suit her schedule. For example my daughter is going to make 1st communion and she says she is keeping the kids that weekend. I do not think she can do that.

 

[tigger22472]

As far as the ex keeping her on your visitation weekend she isn't allowed to do so. On the other hand I would hope that you would make sure your daughter attends her confirmation, I'm sure it's important to her.

On the next issue I'm going to sound harsh because of my own personal situation so I will let you know that before hand. If it is your visitation time and you don't have the children for what ever reason or you need a sitter say because you work the law states that you should offer the time with the other parent. However, they don't have to take this time and it is then up to you set up child care. My ex husband no longer takes visitation, however when he did I expected it to be every other weekend. One particular weekend I had plans to see a concert. I was informed on Thursday that he was working on Friday and couldn't see the kids until Saturday. I was not going to lose 30$ tickets to my concert and in turn had to pay 40$ out of my pocket for a babysitter that I never should of had to have in the first place. I stated this VERY firmly to my ex that I didn't appreciate it. He told me there was nothing he could do for he had to work. I asked him point blank what he thought I did when my bf and I both had to work or had plans to do things. He told me that wasn't his problem so in his mind it was MY place to find child care any and all time. He left me in a position where I had to provide the child care or not do something that I had planned. When it is your visitation time it is YOUR responsibility to find child care. If you are sick and don't take your children then I don't see where it was unfair for your ex to ask for the child care expense ESPECIALLY if she needed someone while she worked.