What is the name of your state? Missouri
I have posted about this subject before. I have some updates and questions.
I'm the Step-mom of a 14 year old girl. My husband (BF) is the NCP. BM has full custody of my SD.
We get 4 separate weeks in the summer (along with standard visitation) with SD and we started our 1st one on the first week of June.
Toward the end of the 1st week in June my SD told me her step-father sexually abused her when she was 9. She said she told her BM about it and her BM didn't believe her and then she told her grandmother (who is now dead) and her grandmother asked BM about it and BM told my SD not to be telling anyone that. SD said BM asked SF about this and of course he deneyed it.
5 years later her mom asked her to make a list of the things she didn't like about her (going through teen years i guess) and one of things my SD said she listed was that BM didn't do anything about what SD told her happened when she was 9. Her moms response was, "Little girls tell lies".
Also, when my SD was 9 and was at our house she thought she started menstrating (she didn't actually know what was happening, but I told her) and we called to let her mom know and mom later said she found out it is perfectly normal for girls to start their period at age 9. Months later my SD told me she hadn't ever had another period. At age 12 she started it for real.
After she told me and I thought on it for a day and a night I called the child abuse hotline. I do believe my SD that this happened. She begged me not to tell anyone. She cried and said she didn't want her mom to go to jail since she knew about it and didn't do anything and she thought her younger brother and sister would go to foster care and that everyone would hate her.
Anyway, CPS asked us to come to there office and sign some paper work and they told us not to return my SD back with her mom until the investigation is final and not to let her talk to her mom on the phone or in person unless she is supervised by her dad or myself.
They called BM that day and informed her of what was going on and when they told her there we allegations of sexual abuse from my SD, BM didn't even ask what they were!! CPS worker said that is a huge red flag.
A couple days later I took my SD in for her interview. She was interviewed in front of a camera and 3 or 4 people. After my SD's interview, the worker told us we should get an attorney and ask for full custody of my SD. She said that with her being 14 and the circumstances, a judge would probably listen to my SD and award my husband with full custody.
My SD said that if she has to return to her moms and the SF is there she doesn't want to go.
CPS told me that without a date give or take a week of when this happened, law enforcement probably won't be able to arrest the SF. My SD thought about it for a while and figured it was June or July of 2000. There are certain things she remembers like the 4th grade teacher that discussed with the class "menstrating", I think she said they even watched a video.
Me and my husband went in Tuesday for our interviews and the worker told us they don't have the evidence they need to file charges against him. She said she's waiting on some medical records that the BM stated she took my SD to the doctor when she was 9 and thought she started her period. They didn't examine her though. I talked to the caseworker on the phone Thursday and she said it will probably be about 2 weeks before she closes the case and then we will have to send her home. She also said that we get to continue normal visitation afterwards. Even though we have had her almost the entire month of June we still get our other 3 weeks. Our 2nd week we chose is the 2nd week of July which is the week we will have to return her and so that means she will go back to her moms in two weeks from yesterday.
My SD called her mom twice and asked her if she could live here and her mom said they would talk about it later and kept saying they had all summer to talk about it. The second time BM told her she misses her and wants her to come home. I didn't figure she'd say yes.
We are going to do what we can to get an attorney and ask for custody. In the meantime, does anyone think this is possible to do by ourselves? My SD is saying she will runaway before going back there. I don't know what we will do if she has to go back.
I have tried to find lawyers who do pro bono and no luck.
Does anyone know how we get started?
Thanks
I have posted about this subject before. I have some updates and questions.
I'm the Step-mom of a 14 year old girl. My husband (BF) is the NCP. BM has full custody of my SD.
We get 4 separate weeks in the summer (along with standard visitation) with SD and we started our 1st one on the first week of June.
Toward the end of the 1st week in June my SD told me her step-father sexually abused her when she was 9. She said she told her BM about it and her BM didn't believe her and then she told her grandmother (who is now dead) and her grandmother asked BM about it and BM told my SD not to be telling anyone that. SD said BM asked SF about this and of course he deneyed it.
5 years later her mom asked her to make a list of the things she didn't like about her (going through teen years i guess) and one of things my SD said she listed was that BM didn't do anything about what SD told her happened when she was 9. Her moms response was, "Little girls tell lies".
Also, when my SD was 9 and was at our house she thought she started menstrating (she didn't actually know what was happening, but I told her) and we called to let her mom know and mom later said she found out it is perfectly normal for girls to start their period at age 9. Months later my SD told me she hadn't ever had another period. At age 12 she started it for real.
After she told me and I thought on it for a day and a night I called the child abuse hotline. I do believe my SD that this happened. She begged me not to tell anyone. She cried and said she didn't want her mom to go to jail since she knew about it and didn't do anything and she thought her younger brother and sister would go to foster care and that everyone would hate her.
Anyway, CPS asked us to come to there office and sign some paper work and they told us not to return my SD back with her mom until the investigation is final and not to let her talk to her mom on the phone or in person unless she is supervised by her dad or myself.
They called BM that day and informed her of what was going on and when they told her there we allegations of sexual abuse from my SD, BM didn't even ask what they were!! CPS worker said that is a huge red flag.
A couple days later I took my SD in for her interview. She was interviewed in front of a camera and 3 or 4 people. After my SD's interview, the worker told us we should get an attorney and ask for full custody of my SD. She said that with her being 14 and the circumstances, a judge would probably listen to my SD and award my husband with full custody.
My SD said that if she has to return to her moms and the SF is there she doesn't want to go.
CPS told me that without a date give or take a week of when this happened, law enforcement probably won't be able to arrest the SF. My SD thought about it for a while and figured it was June or July of 2000. There are certain things she remembers like the 4th grade teacher that discussed with the class "menstrating", I think she said they even watched a video.
Me and my husband went in Tuesday for our interviews and the worker told us they don't have the evidence they need to file charges against him. She said she's waiting on some medical records that the BM stated she took my SD to the doctor when she was 9 and thought she started her period. They didn't examine her though. I talked to the caseworker on the phone Thursday and she said it will probably be about 2 weeks before she closes the case and then we will have to send her home. She also said that we get to continue normal visitation afterwards. Even though we have had her almost the entire month of June we still get our other 3 weeks. Our 2nd week we chose is the 2nd week of July which is the week we will have to return her and so that means she will go back to her moms in two weeks from yesterday.
My SD called her mom twice and asked her if she could live here and her mom said they would talk about it later and kept saying they had all summer to talk about it. The second time BM told her she misses her and wants her to come home. I didn't figure she'd say yes.
We are going to do what we can to get an attorney and ask for custody. In the meantime, does anyone think this is possible to do by ourselves? My SD is saying she will runaway before going back there. I don't know what we will do if she has to go back.
I have tried to find lawyers who do pro bono and no luck.
Does anyone know how we get started?
Thanks
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