what a mess

[barrett21]

What is the name of your state?Tn. Yesterday my Husband recieved paper work from His ex's attorney. They are filing for an emergency hearing on the grounds that after the last court date on June 14th She was denied any phone calls to Her son while He was finishing up his summer visit. Ther her and her husband can not afford to pay for there apartment and also pay on there new home they are purchasing in Kentucky. That if the court does not hear this matter quickly she will be forced to move there son around from school to school. She said that she followed the parent relocation like she was supposed to even though when my husband said no to the move she said it was his burden to stop her and made him file the petition. And last but not least that this is all putting stress and anxiety on her unborn child and she has been put on pre term labor pills.

They are also filing contempt of court on my husband for not paying for medical when tenncare ended on the child but no one bothered to tell my husband that it ended he gets no notices about his son's insurance what so ever. Also contempt because my husband and I was not married by the end of march but the reason for that was my husband was hit head on by a semi truck.

My husband's lawyer says there is no way that he can do this, this comeing up tuesday it's not enough time for us to even answer. Do you think they can get all of this done?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state?Tn. Yesterday my Husband recieved paper work from His ex's attorney. They are filing for an emergency hearing on the grounds that after the last court date on June 14th She was denied any phone calls to Her son while He was finishing up his summer visit. Ther her and her husband can not afford to pay for there apartment and also pay on there new home they are purchasing in Kentucky. That if the court does not hear this matter quickly she will be forced to move there son around from school to school. She said that she followed the parent relocation like she was supposed to even though when my husband said no to the move she said it was his burden to stop her and made him file the petition. And last but not least that this is all putting stress and anxiety on her unborn child and she has been put on pre term labor pills.

They are also filing contempt of court on my husband for not paying for medical when tenncare ended on the child but no one bothered to tell my husband that it ended he gets no notices about his son's insurance what so ever. Also contempt because my husband and I was not married by the end of march but the reason for that was my husband was hit head on by a semi truck.

My husband's lawyer says there is no way that he can do this, this comeing up tuesday it's not enough time for us to even answer. Do you think they can get all of this done?

Possibly....

Did your husband deny mom phone contact with the child?...or refuse to answer the phone when she called?

Did mom ask him for reimbursement of medical bills/health insurance and he refused?

She is correct that it was dad's responsibility to petition to stop her relocation. Did dad not follow through in the required amount of time? Will her move make the current visitation schedule unworkable?

I am sure that they can't afford both the apartment and the house and its quite possible that the stress and anxiety of the situation is putting her unborn child at risk. The judge may or may not give consideration to those issues.

 

[barrett21]

answers

No he did not deny phone contact. She was calling everyday sometimes 4 or 5 times during his visit. All he did was ask his lawyer did she have that right to do that because when she would call she would tell their son that she missed him so bad it was breaking her heart and stuff and count the days until he was coming home so his son would be upset afterwards. So yes I admit he did not answer like two of them but she did get to talk to him once a day he just wanted to take some time for himself and his son.

No she never mentioned no medical she would not tell my husband anything about it stating that it was none of his business the only thing that she said to him was that her and her husband had medical and was keeping it if my husband got medical or not. Now in the court papers she is saying her husband comes out of pocket $4000.00 a year for medical and they want to keep there medical and for my husband to be responsible for any and all left over medical bills.

My husband thought that if she asked to move and he did not agree it was her job to file petition to get the courts permission. Yes, he did file in the required time. Well she is moving to Berea Ky it is 229 miles from us she says that the every other weekend and the current schedule can stay the same but my husband thinks it might be to much for his 6 year old he's really not sure.

I'm sure it is to much also to pay for the house and apt but I would think she would of waited to get the courts permission before going and buying a house.

She also states that because my husband is filing for disability he's not capable of caring of his son that her and her husband are more capable but what is the difference if I care for him or her husband cares for him.

 

[LdiJ]

No he did not deny phone contact. She was calling everyday sometimes 4 or 5 times during his visit. All he did was ask his lawyer did she have that right to do that because when she would call she would tell their son that she missed him so bad it was breaking her heart and stuff and count the days until he was coming home so his son would be upset afterwards. So yes I admit he did not answer like two of them but she did get to talk to him once a day he just wanted to take some time for himself and his son.

So he did deny some phone contact.....If she was calling 4-5 times a day but only got to speak to the child once a day, then he didn't answer more than 2 phone calls. That part probably won't give him too much grief, but rather than not answering her calls it would have been better to take it back to court and ask that she be limited to once a day. Tell the unvarnished truth in court..don't try to put a "spin" on things.

No she never mentioned no medical she would not tell my husband anything about it stating that it was none of his business the only thing that she said to him was that her and her husband had medical and was keeping it if my husband got medical or not. Now in the court papers she is saying her husband comes out of pocket $4000.00 a year for medical and they want to keep there medical and for my husband to be responsible for any and all left over medical bills.

If your husband was ordered to pay medical insurance and a portion of unreimbursed medical expenses, and didn't......that is a problem. Obviously he was aware of the fact that mom's husband was providing insurance. If mom truly never requested any kind of reimbursement, and he can prove that, he may not get dinged to hard on that one......but he is probably going to get ordered to reimburse whatever is outstanding. Again, tell the unvarnished truth in court. In your first post you said he had no idea that the child was no longer on Tenncare, yet in this one you admit that he knew that the stepfather was carrying medical insurance. That is the kind of thing that damages your credibility with a judge.

My husband thought that if she asked to move and he did not agree it was her job to file petition to get the courts permission. Yes, he did file in the required time. Well she is moving to Berea Ky it is 229 miles from us she says that the every other weekend and the current schedule can stay the same but my husband thinks it might be to much for his 6 year old he's really not sure.

Nope, its her job to notify him, and his job to petition to stop the relocation.

I'm sure it is to much also to pay for the house and apt but I would think she would of waited to get the courts permission before going and buying a house.

True, she should have waited.

She also states that because my husband is filing for disability he's not capable of caring of his son that her and her husband are more capable but what is the difference if I care for him or her husband cares for him.

The issue is that your husband may be unable to care for the child....while their household has two adults that can care for the child. The distance is still doable to maintain the visitation schedule, so that it in her favor.

How far apart do you live now?

 

[barrett21]

distance

No when their child first come for his visit she was calling him 4 or 5 times a day and the child was talking to her every time she called it wasn't until toward middle of the visit my husband asked his lawyer and they said she should only call about once or twice a week and that he did not have to let her talk but he would still let her talk to him once a day but just not answer the other 4 or 5 phone calls.

He was ordered to pay medical when tenncare ended on the child he don't even know when that ended all he knew was what she told him and even then she did not want him to know nothing about it he still does not know what medical or anything his son has one time she did not show for a visit and said they had been at the er and tore all the information about the medical off of the paper.

Well at least we now know it was his job to file thanks for sorting that out.

Right now I think they are 109 miles apart she drives him to our town on Friday and we take him to his on Sunday.

Do you think they will keep the every other weekend schedule? And if so right now he only gets 16 days for the summer could he ask for 6weeks so there won't be so much driving? He always wants to ask that if for some reason the weather is bad in the winter and he can not get him can he get make up time do You think that will be to much to ask for?

 

[LdiJ]

No when their child first come for his visit she was calling him 4 or 5 times a day and the child was talking to her every time she called it wasn't until toward middle of the visit my husband asked his lawyer and they said she should only call about once or twice a week and that he did not have to let her talk but he would still let her talk to him once a day but just not answer the other 4 or 5 phone calls.

He was ordered to pay medical when tenncare ended on the child he don't even know when that ended all he knew was what she told him and even then she did not want him to know nothing about it he still does not know what medical or anything his son has one time she did not show for a visit and said they had been at the er and tore all the information about the medical off of the paper.

Well at least we now know it was his job to file thanks for sorting that out.

Right now I think they are 109 miles apart she drives him to our town on Friday and we take him to his on Sunday.

Do you think they will keep the every other weekend schedule? And if so right now he only gets 16 days for the summer could he ask for 6weeks so there won't be so much driving? He always wants to ask that if for some reason the weather is bad in the winter and he can not get him can he get make up time do You think that will be to much to ask for?

The six weeks that you want in the summer could be a good negotiating tool in regards to the move. Why not suggest to mom that your husband is willing to negotiate a settlement on the move?

Ask her to meet you half way to exchange the child (its really only going to be workable if you do that) ask her to increase summer visitation to six weeks....and ask for automatic makeup time if winter weather prevents a particular visit. If mom is anxious to get everything settled this is dad's best time to get what he wants in those regards.

 

[barrett21]

She says that she can not deal with my husband that she is incapable of coming to an agreement with him. The only thing about the drive is that right now I have to drive my husband our pick-up and drop-off is at 6:30pm I can not get off work at 4:00 and get him there in time. She is a stay at home mom my husband thinks the drive should stay as it is now that she brings him on Friday and then on Sunday we drive him halfway back to her.

I already told her if it was me and I wanted to go as bad as she did it's not that bad. My husband just really fears her getting up there and not abiding by the CO or him losing Jurisdiction but his lawyer told him he would only lose that if he left the state of TN do you know if that is true?

 

[tigger22472]

Barrett...

Explain this to me... Do you know the difference between telling the truth and telling a lie? Do you know the difference between right and wrong?

I took it upon myself to search your posts because something with this one just didn't add up. You have tripped over yourself NUMEROUS times in this thread alone. FIrst you say dad didn't deny calls, then it was only one or two then it was 3-4 a day. You said you didn't know the child wasn't on TenCAre but then you say you knew step-dad was covering him... If your husband was ordered to do so he was ordered to do so.

In one post you claim mom lives in an apartment, just as you do here and had the nerve to ask if she had to notify you because the apt. complex changed names and put up gates... On 6/1 you claim she lives with her parents and she doesn't let your husband see the child. Yet here 22 days later she's in an apartment and can't afford that and a house she is or is getting in KY. You also claim on 6/1 that she only lives 15 minutes away yet say here that you've had to had HER bring the child to your home on Fridays because drop off is 6:30 and you don't get off until 4PM... you can't drive a 15 minute drive in 2.5 hours?

You know this forum is for people who want help and who actually have problems!!! People like you irritate me because you take away from people who actually need help!!!

 

[barrett21]

Yes I know the difference. We did not deny the calls when he came for his visits like I said she was talking to him 4 or 5 times a day. Then my husband got tired of it becuase it was every day so he did not answer the phone but it was no more than two times that he did that he just wanted a day to himself with his son that it is not a bad thing. You make it sound like it was every day and when she had it put in this response petiton she had it put in there she was denied all calls. Which is a lie.

We don't know when the child got off tenncare nor do we know how long the step dad covered him we did not even find out he covered him until after this last court hearing when the mother mentioned it to us and then the only thing that brought it up was my husband asked about the insurance and she said it don't matter if you get it my husband has it on him the medical issue was not even brought up in this last hearing it was brought up in the first and now she is bringing it up in this one. She knows my husband can not get it on him at the time is the only reason it is a problem right now because my husband is currently trying to recover from his accident so he does not have a job to obtain insurance.

The mother does have an apartment in clarksville tn. She did come down after the child got out of school May 19 and stayed about a month with her parents but kept her apt. Yes she still has her apt and they are currently buying a house in ky we just got the papers and address for it yesterday from her Lawyer.Her parents only live 15 minutes away. I've never said she has been to my home she never has she brings him to the Jail to drop-off in the parking lot on Fridays we meet her in our town at 6:30. Sorry I should have been more specific what I meant about getting off at 4:00 and getting him there in time is if they change the meet point to albany ky like she is proposing to do now on Fridays I can't get him there in time.

My husband does want help and I am not lieing this is confusing because this is how it really is we deal with this every day this lady lives this crazy life like this. I'm sorry if it is hard for me to explain it all.

 

[barrett21]

court hearing

Well my husband talked to his lawyer there is a hearing set for tuesday to see about the TRO Order I hope that this goes well his ex and her attorney claim they had no notice even though when we went to court on the 14th the judge had the clerk to call her lawyer and we waited over and hour then finally when she did not show they heard our case. I hope all of this works out. I swear that I am telling the truth about all of this I am sorry if I confuse some of You it is so confusing to us also. My husband does appreciate all of the advice he gets on here please just bear with me. I will try to explain better from now on.