What Can I Do?

[kbruce]

hi,
my husband and i live in texas, but he has a child-support and visitation order with his ex in virginia. my husband moved to texas five years ago, at which point he lost contact with his ex. last week we were finally able to contact her and she informed us that not only is their 6-year old daughter living with her parents, but that she has started the process of having his parental rights terminated due to negligence. she has moved to another city and we had no way of contacting her. her parents and my 6-year old step-daughter are residing in another state. my husband left virginia to try and provide a better life for himself and his child. is there any way that he can prove that he had no intention of neglecting his child or abandoning her. he has not been able to pay his child support , but for the last three years his ex has gotten his income tax return. please advise me as to whether or not there is anything that can be done on our part to salvage a relationship with his daughter.

 

[tkern1230]

How sad for the daughter that both her father and mother have moved away from her. The first thing that I would recommend is that someone get the daughter some couseling.

As for your husband, he did abandon her. Period. Regardless of why he did it, it was done none the less. Moving to another state to make a better life for himself and his new family shouldn't have prevented him from keeping in touch with his daughter. It sounds like you are making excuses for his negligence toward her.

It's not clear to me why the mother moved away from her and why she left her with the grandparents. I'm assuming that where the daughter lives with the grandparents is the preciding jurisdiction of the original custody agreement to begin with.

My guess based on the information is that he will lose any custody rights to her. I would also be surprised if there isn't a warrant out for his arrest if he is in arrers with child support. He needs to be a man and contact someone in the jurisdiction where she lives to find out what steps he needs to take to correct what he has done to her and to begin rebuilding his relationship with her.

 

[Grace_Adler]

First they can't arrest you for failure to pay. You have to be served a summons to go to court to show cause. However after the hearing, you can be found guilty and be sent to jail. Is he in arrears now? She didn't say he moved to provide a better life for his new family she said for him and his child which I'm assuming is the one in VA. There is also a time limit on what is considered abandonment. You need to check VA's laws on this. How long has it been since he's had contact with her? If there is a court order it may be possible to turn the tables and say she is in contempt for failure to comply because she didn't keep him informed of her mailing address, which usually is stated plainly in the orders, and also from preventing him from from keeping in contact. However if he didn't keep up his end I don't know if he could be in contempt too? It's hard to say how this will turn out but you need to start getting contact with this child now. If he has tried to resume a relationship with her they may not do anything. Do it through certified mail or whatever if you can find the child. You need to call a lawyer or get legal aid ASAP!! You can look up VA laws on http://polisci.com/web/slegis.htm