What if child refuses to go?

[buka]

Minnesota

NCP (mother) sees 10-year-old child every other weekend. NCP has not historically cared for child well. Child does not like going for visits. He is becoming more and more adament about not wanting to go as he gets older.

CP has always told him he has to go, but my question is: If a child outright refuses to go, what can be done? Can CP be held in contempt? If so, at what point will a court recognize child's wishes?

 

[meleahk1]

Does your child say why they don't want to go? Is there a second family where the child may feel negleted? of jealous? Is the child mistreated in any way? abused? What are the reasons given as to why the child don't want to go?

 

[curlyq's mom]

In Illinois I believe a child can decide who to live with and also refuse to go on visits at the age of 12. When the latter happens, sometimes the NCP tries to make alternate arrangements, such as meeting for lunch, dinner, movie, shopping, etc. instead of a full day(s) visit. Maybe there is such a rule in your state.

 

[buka]

Thank you for your replies.

The child does not want to go because NCP does not pay attention to him. She takes him because it is her right, not because she wishes to spend time with him. He is ignored and his visits end up feeling like punishment. Unfortunately, the situation is not "bad enough" for a court to eliminate visitation.

The suggestion of making alternate plans is a good one, however, the NCP and CP do not get along and NCP is generally very inflexible. Child has told NCP that he does not want to go to her house, but her response is that she is "entitled" to her visits and what she does (or does not do) with them is her decision.

 

[Grandma B]

CPs are obligated to provide court-ordered visitation. It is entirely possible to be held in contempt if the child refuses to go.

 

[buka]

So, if CP can be held in contempt, just wait to see if child DOES eventually refuse, and then go back to court to modify the order based on his wishes? Or wait to see if NCP even takes CP back to court? It doesn't seem that anything can be done before the child has refused, but that would mean that CP could be held in contempt if a visit has already been refused.

Sorry, not trying to confuse things. It just seems likely that this will be an issue very soon -- would like to know how to proceed.