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What is Legal Status After 51 Year abandonment

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GinnyJean7

New member
What is the name of your state? New Jersey. My mother (86 years old) was abandoned by her legal husband in 1967, with NO contact or monetary support since that day and never remarried. At the time, she was told by a welfare office clerk, after 7 years, she would be "considered" divorced. She never took legal action to be granted a legal divorce. Now she is being asked by Medicaid what her marital status is (single/married/separated/divorced/widowed). She answered "separated" and now they want her to provide them with either divorce papers or a death certificate. We have neither. Should she claim her marital status as single on paperwork? Or does she need to get a divorce decree? A Social Security search appears he is deceased, but we don't have the where or when info to request a death certificate.
 


FlyingRon

Senior Member
Unless she can show her husband as DEAD, her status is MARRIED.

Legally separated requires a mutual agreement which she does not appear to have.
Abandonment for more than 12 years is basis for at-fault divorce, but she'll still need to go through the process.

The first step is to figure out where the husband is. If he's dead, her problems are pretty much solved. If not, she'll have to go to court.
 
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Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
If she never got a divorce, then she was never divorced. I suspect that your mother's memory of events may be a bit distorted after 50+ years. I doubt that she was told that she would be "considered" divorced - rather, she was likely told that she could easily get a divorce based upon the abandonment.
 

xylene

Senior Member
Hire an investigator to 'dig up' the death certificate.

PS - an easy start before you hire anyone would be the vital records offices (1st county, then State) of the place where they lived when they were last together.

The social security death index tells the date of death.
 

xylene

Senior Member
ALSO: If you can't establish death with a death certificate, there are procedures.

Look at https://secure.ssa.gov/poms.nsf/lnx/0200304025#b

You may need legal help. However, I beleive if you are persistent, you will get the death certificate. It will take some leg work. If he dided recently enough to leave some trace on the internet, and old phone number or address, you'll have it made. Start with big cities in the state he lived in or was born in.

Skiptracing dead people is somewhat easier, because they are no longer in position to do anything to obscure where they are (creating new aliases, etc.) like a person fleeing someone.
 

Pinkie39

Member
I'm a Medicaid caseworker in Ohio. We have access to SSA death records as well. Have you told your mother's caseworker that you found her husband on there?

I personally never request a death certificate, if I can confirm the death through the SSA or an obituary.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Hire an investigator to 'dig up' the death certificate.

PS - an easy start before you hire anyone would be the vital records offices (1st county, then State) of the place where they lived when they were last together.

The social security death index tells the date of death.
The SS index also shows the city and state of death as well.
 

HRZ

Senior Member
BTW! As a side issue if hubby qualified for SS then Mom would also qualify as spouse or widow as the case may be ..the marriage does not just disappear into winds .
 

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