What is the name of your state? Stepdaughter and her father live in Arizona. I now live in California.
In September I finalized the divorce with my ex husband who I had been married to for 9 years. The divorce is all handled. The issue is with my stepdaughter. She and I have always had a great relationship and she even wanted to move away with me after the divorce. At the time I assumed it was a nonstarter as I was not legally a parent to her. My ex is also spiteful and would never have approved of her moving with me. He at the time had his sister and brother- in-law backing him up. Which is important to note because my ex is disabled and is not capable living on his own. So the plan was for him and my stepdaughter to go live with them.
Now despite all this my ex has allowed me to keep in contact with his daughter. Mostly I think because he wants me to keep paying for her phone. So I still talk to her and message her all the time and thought everything was fine with her. However, she just admitted that things haven't been going good because she's not getting along with her aunt and uncle and now they do not want her to live with them anymore. Also that they couldn't deal with helping her dad out even with the caregiver the state pays for so they had him moved to an assisted living facility which is several hours away as there was not one nearer their home that would be fully covered. So she hasn't even seen him in person since he moved there, which was only a few weeks after the divorce.
I have talked to my ex's sister about this and she confirmed everything and basically said they were done, but they hadn't contacted social services. So I messaged my ex, but he only replied that it was none of my business.
So now that I know how much the situation has changed I'm wondering if it would be worth looking into whether or not I have a chance of getting custody as there is literally no other family that could or would take my stepdaughter. Like I assume I would have to sign up to be a foster parent, but obviously it's more complicated since I live in a different state than her father. So I do not know if it is possible. Also I do not believe her father would ever approve as I think it's obvious he still hates me. That's said his sister is now very anti-him and she is okay with me taking her.
In September I finalized the divorce with my ex husband who I had been married to for 9 years. The divorce is all handled. The issue is with my stepdaughter. She and I have always had a great relationship and she even wanted to move away with me after the divorce. At the time I assumed it was a nonstarter as I was not legally a parent to her. My ex is also spiteful and would never have approved of her moving with me. He at the time had his sister and brother- in-law backing him up. Which is important to note because my ex is disabled and is not capable living on his own. So the plan was for him and my stepdaughter to go live with them.
Now despite all this my ex has allowed me to keep in contact with his daughter. Mostly I think because he wants me to keep paying for her phone. So I still talk to her and message her all the time and thought everything was fine with her. However, she just admitted that things haven't been going good because she's not getting along with her aunt and uncle and now they do not want her to live with them anymore. Also that they couldn't deal with helping her dad out even with the caregiver the state pays for so they had him moved to an assisted living facility which is several hours away as there was not one nearer their home that would be fully covered. So she hasn't even seen him in person since he moved there, which was only a few weeks after the divorce.
I have talked to my ex's sister about this and she confirmed everything and basically said they were done, but they hadn't contacted social services. So I messaged my ex, but he only replied that it was none of my business.
So now that I know how much the situation has changed I'm wondering if it would be worth looking into whether or not I have a chance of getting custody as there is literally no other family that could or would take my stepdaughter. Like I assume I would have to sign up to be a foster parent, but obviously it's more complicated since I live in a different state than her father. So I do not know if it is possible. Also I do not believe her father would ever approve as I think it's obvious he still hates me. That's said his sister is now very anti-him and she is okay with me taking her.
