I have a order in virginia. if we come up with a written plan regarding arrears being settled and when the payments are due. can that document be upheld in court? because i was told that once an order is in place the only person that can modify it is the judge. and that even though i agreed that the arrears would be settled i could still ask for it in a court. because the order states that part of the support goes toward the arrears. Also can the father go in court and say he has x amount of children to support without any doucmentation stating that he provides for these children. and can this statment be from someone that he lives with and the child are her's.