• FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.

Wife is threatening me

Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills   Please click a topic or scroll down for more.

Addy32310

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia

So I'll get to the point. My wife and I have been separated for 6 years, not legally. I've been with my Fiance for 4 years we bought a house together a year ago. My name is the only name on the mortgage and I noted on my house paperwork my marital status as separated. I am in the navy fyi only. My wife is 6 months pregnant with her boyfriend's kid who is also in the navy. Her and I have a child together as well. I've been trying to get her to agree to divorce me without fighting it out and paying thousands and thousands of dollars but she hasn't as of yet. I was deployed when my daughter was born and my wife did not put me on her birth certificate I pay her $600 A month child support not court ordered obviously. I told her today she has to divorce me and if I have to pay all the money in the world I will figure out a way to do it. She came back and said she has paperwork that says I can be charged with fraud and lose my house because her name is not on my house. She is also threatening to take my daughter away to another state because her boyfriend is being stationed there. Someone please give me some advice and let me know if I can truly lose my house. All advice will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
 


Just Blue

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia

So I'll get to the point. My wife and I have been separated for 6 years, not legally. I've been with my Fiance for 4 years we bought a house together a year ago. My name is the only name on the mortgage and I noted on my house paperwork my marital status as separated. I am in the navy fyi only. My wife is 6 months pregnant with her boyfriend's kid who is also in the navy. Her and I have a child together as well. I've been trying to get her to agree to divorce me without fighting it out and paying thousands and thousands of dollars but she hasn't as of yet. I was deployed when my daughter was born and my wife did not put me on her birth certificate I pay her $600 A month child support not court ordered obviously. I told her today she has to divorce me and if I have to pay all the money in the world I will figure out a way to do it. She came back and said she has paperwork that says I can be charged with fraud and lose my house because her name is not on my house. She is also threatening to take my daughter away to another state because her boyfriend is being stationed there. Someone please give me some advice and let me know if I can truly lose my house. All advice will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
After reading the first 3 lines of your post my advice is...hire an attorney.
 

Addy32310

Junior Member
After reading the first 3 lines of your post my advice is...hire an attorney.
I am hiring an attorney but I won't be able get a meeting till Monday at the earliest. I'm just asking to ease my mind until then. I can't stop thinking about her saying I vomited fraud and I will lose my house.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I am hiring an attorney but I won't be able get a meeting till Monday at the earliest. I'm just asking to ease my mind until then. I can't stop thinking about her saying I vomited fraud and I will lose my house.
NEVER EVER listen to what a soon to be ex or a separated spouse has to say. Wait until you can talk to an attorney.

However, you do not have a fiancée. One cannot have a fiancée if they are legally married.
 

xylene

Senior Member
Buying a house in these circumstamces, was, very foolish.

Getting engaged is also very problematic.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
NEVER EVER listen to what a soon to be ex or a separated spouse has to say. Wait until you can talk to an attorney.

However, you do not have a fiancée. One cannot have a fiancée if they are legally married.
Agree......
 

Addy32310

Junior Member
Ok fine girlfriend, but what about her being pregnant by another man? All you all have done is talk about me having a girlfriend but nothing about wether or not I can lose my home nor about her being pregnant by another man still married to me.
 

HRZ

Senior Member
Your wife is free to relocate to Alaska but you might have a lot of,legal leverage to retain your child in VA if that's where everyone is now .

You need counsel ...and stop talking to your wife absent input from counsel.

I don't know if such a thing as legal separation is granted in VA.

You need counsel.

Wife 's leverage as to your home value is far from clear. Again, best asked of counsel
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Ok fine girlfriend, but what about her being pregnant by another man? All you all have done is talk about me having a girlfriend but nothing about wether or not I can lose my home nor about her being pregnant by another man still married to me.
You have a complicated situation and you did not get advice before you did financial things. That is why you NEED an attorney.

Her child by another man would legally be your child because you are legally married to her. You need an attorney to undo the mess you have made.
 

latigo

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia

So I'll get to the point. My wife and I have been separated for 6 years, not legally. I've been with my Fiance for 4 years we bought a house together a year ago. My name is the only name on the mortgage and I noted on my house paperwork my marital status as separated. I am in the navy fyi only. My wife is 6 months pregnant with her boyfriend's kid who is also in the navy. Her and I have a child together as well. I've been trying to get her to agree to divorce me without fighting it out and paying thousands and thousands of dollars but she hasn't as of yet. I was deployed when my daughter was born and my wife did not put me on her birth certificate I pay her $600 A month child support not court ordered obviously. I told her today she has to divorce me and if I have to pay all the money in the world I will figure out a way to do it. She came back and said she has paperwork that says I can be charged with fraud and lose my house because her name is not on my house. She is also threatening to take my daughter away to another state because her boyfriend is being stationed there. Someone please give me some advice and let me know if I can truly lose my house. All advice will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Please don't fret over your wife's threats to have you charged with fraud. That is not going to happen! This "paperwork" business is a total fabrication.

Also I don't think she has any claim to your home. You will need to hear from you attorney on the issue, but it is my understanding that in Virginia your salary since the separation is your separate property - as distinguished from marital property. So if the home was purchased with your income following the separation, your wife would have no claim to it.

Likewise anything she has acquired from her income since the separation is her separate property and you would have no claim to it.

This wouldn't be so in my bailiwick which is several water sheds removed from Virginia. Here it is only the wife's income during separation that is treated as separate property. The husband's earnings remain marital and are jointly shared. But rely on your attorney, not me as I'm seldom right.*
__________________


[*] I inherited this mental deficiency from my grandmother who went to her grave convinced the John Wayne won the Medal of Honor for his heroics in fighting the Japs in WWII and that the Moon landings were science fiction.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
But rely on your attorney, not me as I'm seldom right.*
__________________


[*] I inherited this mental deficiency from my grandmother who went to her grave convinced the John Wayne won the Medal of Honor for his heroics in fighting the Japs in WWII and that the Moon landings were science fiction.
Thank you, lattie, for a laugh on a cold and snowy morning!

OP.... there's little point in commenting on your wife's actions wrt a b/f and pregnancy as she is not here looking for advice/information. But be advised that, unless the impending child's birth/paternity are handled properly according to the laws of your state, you will be considered the legal father if the child is born prior to your divorce. And then, likely be ordered to pay support.

Your existing child with your wife, assuming she was born while you were married, is legally your child and you will be ordered to support her - note that what you have been paying up until now will likely be considered a gift - the laws of your state (the state w/jurisdiction) will govern whether Mom can get retroactive support or not. You can contest any relocation of your joint child, but your success may well depend on how close you live to her now and what your parenting time/contact with the child are. Be advised that relocations for military purposes are often more successful, although that usually revolves around a marital state, i.e. her wanting to relocate to where her *husband* is stationed, not her boyfriend.

It is unlikely you'll be charged with fraud, but the house may be considered marital property. Again, depending on the laws of your state.

I really don't understand why you didn't file for divorce yourself well before this. But at this point, you've made such a mess through inaction/ignorance, you absolutely need an attorney to assist you. I hope you have not further muddied the waters by getting your g/f pregnant... DON'T.

p.s. It might be best to change your username unless Addy is not your daughter or g/f or anyone remotely related to you. On the chance that you are the g/f posting as the guy.... Don't. Send him to a lawyer and/orhave him post his own situation. Thanks.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
Thank you, lattie, for a laugh on a cold and snowy morning!

OP.... there's little point in commenting on your wife's actions wrt a b/f and pregnancy as she is not here looking for advice/information. But be advised that, unless the impending child's birth/paternity are handled properly according to the laws of your state, you will be considered the legal father if the child is born prior to your divorce. And then, likely be ordered to pay support.

Your existing child with your wife, assuming she was born while you were married, is legally your child and you will be ordered to support her - note that what you have been paying up until now will likely be considered a gift - the laws of your state (the state w/jurisdiction) will govern whether Mom can get retroactive support or not. You can contest any relocation of your joint child, but your success may well depend on how close you live to her now and what your parenting time/contact with the child are. Be advised that relocations for military purposes are often more successful, although that usually revolves around a marital state, i.e. her wanting to relocate to where her *husband* is stationed, not her boyfriend.

It is unlikely you'll be charged with fraud, but the house may be considered marital property. Again, depending on the laws of your state.

I really don't understand why you didn't file for divorce yourself well before this. But at this point, you've made such a mess through inaction/ignorance, you absolutely need an attorney to assist you. I hope you have not further muddied the waters by getting your g/f pregnant... DON'T.

p.s. It might be best to change your username unless Addy is not your daughter or g/f or anyone remotely related to you. On the chance that you are the g/f posting as the guy.... Don't. Send him to a lawyer and/orhave him post his own situation. Thanks.
^^wicked like^^.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Ok fine girlfriend, but what about her being pregnant by another man? All you all have done is talk about me having a girlfriend but nothing about wether or not I can lose my home nor about her being pregnant by another man still married to me.
The house you bought with your mistress is most likely marital property. Your wife is entitled to half the equity in it. You weren't legally separated therefore you could not have told the bank that you were. You were MARRIED. That is problematic. Hope you can afford to pay your wife at least half the amount of equity in the house.
 

Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!

Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">
Top