V
vik95
Guest
What is the name of your state? New Jersey
If a child 8 1/2 years old doesn't want to visit with her father alone because she is uncomfortable with him - but cannot articulate why she is uncomfortable would she be forced to visit.
Counseling was ordered in our divorce creed 2 years ago - my ex-husband did not follow through with the orders to pick a counselor out of the 4 names I was to supply him with.
Now 2 years later - he has filed a motion (in the same state, New Jersey that the divorce creed was issued in) for 2 nights every other weekend - every other holiday, 1 week in June and 2 weeks in August. How can he ask for this kind of visitation schedule when she has never gone with him alone - even for a day.
Our daughter has never gone on a visit with him alone - she is very apprehensive about it. Either my sister has gone - this is what the judge ordered and then when she no longer could give up her time to accomodate - I would go along which was not pleasant to be with my ex - I only went for our daughter's sake.
My ex refuses to talk to me or acknowledge me. I have since remarried and my husband fully supports my position and loves my daughter as his own.
My ex, will not say hello to me when he calls or when he would come up to see our daughter. I believe he is very angry that I divorced him.
The past 6 months - I was not able to accomodate and go on any visits because I was pregnant and not feeling well - so my daughter would only go if a friend of hers would go too. There were numerous times when my ex would not come at all because he refused to come pick up our daughter at her home. He wanted her dropped off at McDonald's and he would pick her up there. This only added to our daughter's hesitations about going with him. So I refused to accomodate. The visits where he would come to our home would take place at a mall, movie, pool in her hometown and would last about 4-5hours.
Our daughter would invite him into our home so she could show him things of hers and he would refuse. He would drop her off at the doorstop.
I believe the judge will reinstate what the original order states - and that is to go for family counseling.
Won't it look bad for my ex though - because it's been 2 years and he has not taken any steps to better understand why our daughter is having trouble being with him? He has ignored the order to go for family counseling. I believe he has ignored this order because he is to drive up to my home area for the sessions which is 2 1/2 hours away and he is responsible for 75% of the cost. He also believes I am to blame for why she doesn't want to go with him.
He tried to have the sessions where he lives and the judge denied his request.
For the past 2 years that we have been divorced he has been indifferent and inconsistent in asking to see our daughter. He calls sometimes and then doesn't call for weeks.
Does the court consider all of these factors - When we separated he said it was his right to have his daughter overnight - she was just 4 years old at the time - he said she should be forced to go with him even though she would cry.
I couldn't pry her from my arms to get her into his car that's how bad it was when she was young - so I refused to do it his way - the forcing way. He was so sure that a judge would force her - but instead he ordered family counseling to understand our daughter's fears, hesitations about going with her dad alone.
And also to help her overcome them.
Pending counseling, visits with him were to take place with a 3rd party present.
The judge ordered counseling and then stated that after 3 months of counseling either party could request that the therapist issue a report.
Nothing has ever hurt me more than the thought of my daughter having to be forced to go with her dad before she is ready. What makes it difficult also is the fact that he lives 2 1/2 hours away.
Any info or advice??
I already posted a message in regards to this sensitive matter - but I wanted to add more details to shed more light on the issue.
Thanks
If a child 8 1/2 years old doesn't want to visit with her father alone because she is uncomfortable with him - but cannot articulate why she is uncomfortable would she be forced to visit.
Counseling was ordered in our divorce creed 2 years ago - my ex-husband did not follow through with the orders to pick a counselor out of the 4 names I was to supply him with.
Now 2 years later - he has filed a motion (in the same state, New Jersey that the divorce creed was issued in) for 2 nights every other weekend - every other holiday, 1 week in June and 2 weeks in August. How can he ask for this kind of visitation schedule when she has never gone with him alone - even for a day.
Our daughter has never gone on a visit with him alone - she is very apprehensive about it. Either my sister has gone - this is what the judge ordered and then when she no longer could give up her time to accomodate - I would go along which was not pleasant to be with my ex - I only went for our daughter's sake.
My ex refuses to talk to me or acknowledge me. I have since remarried and my husband fully supports my position and loves my daughter as his own.
My ex, will not say hello to me when he calls or when he would come up to see our daughter. I believe he is very angry that I divorced him.
The past 6 months - I was not able to accomodate and go on any visits because I was pregnant and not feeling well - so my daughter would only go if a friend of hers would go too. There were numerous times when my ex would not come at all because he refused to come pick up our daughter at her home. He wanted her dropped off at McDonald's and he would pick her up there. This only added to our daughter's hesitations about going with him. So I refused to accomodate. The visits where he would come to our home would take place at a mall, movie, pool in her hometown and would last about 4-5hours.
Our daughter would invite him into our home so she could show him things of hers and he would refuse. He would drop her off at the doorstop.
I believe the judge will reinstate what the original order states - and that is to go for family counseling.
Won't it look bad for my ex though - because it's been 2 years and he has not taken any steps to better understand why our daughter is having trouble being with him? He has ignored the order to go for family counseling. I believe he has ignored this order because he is to drive up to my home area for the sessions which is 2 1/2 hours away and he is responsible for 75% of the cost. He also believes I am to blame for why she doesn't want to go with him.
He tried to have the sessions where he lives and the judge denied his request.
For the past 2 years that we have been divorced he has been indifferent and inconsistent in asking to see our daughter. He calls sometimes and then doesn't call for weeks.
Does the court consider all of these factors - When we separated he said it was his right to have his daughter overnight - she was just 4 years old at the time - he said she should be forced to go with him even though she would cry.
I couldn't pry her from my arms to get her into his car that's how bad it was when she was young - so I refused to do it his way - the forcing way. He was so sure that a judge would force her - but instead he ordered family counseling to understand our daughter's fears, hesitations about going with her dad alone.
And also to help her overcome them.
Pending counseling, visits with him were to take place with a 3rd party present.
The judge ordered counseling and then stated that after 3 months of counseling either party could request that the therapist issue a report.
Nothing has ever hurt me more than the thought of my daughter having to be forced to go with her dad before she is ready. What makes it difficult also is the fact that he lives 2 1/2 hours away.
Any info or advice??
I already posted a message in regards to this sensitive matter - but I wanted to add more details to shed more light on the issue.
Thanks