Will Separation Also Terminate Legal Claim To Home?

[Bluefavorite]

Kentucky

Married 17 years and we will stick it out 2 more until the kid is 18. I have a free home any time as my Mother is leaving me a nice property.

It is non contested and we are beyond hating one another to the point we both just want something to end it.

My ONLY want is I do noy want any legal responsibility for our marital home. It is too big and if we separate legally but not divorce (so i can continue to get some benefits - we both want that), I read that I could be responsible for the home if my husband defaults.

He will default. So in order to be sure when he defaults that the bank cannot come after me, is divorce my only option? Honestly I wish he could keep it. I hate the home. He wants it. But the upkeep the HOA expenses, the utilities, it is not doable with me gone, and he really refuses to accept it.

A divorce may force a sale of it anyway, so my idea is to talk him into down sizing and selling so he has more discretionary income, and we don't have to fully divorce. This is a 250K home, with a LOT of equity, there are plenty of nice homes one can down size to, so I am not asking to run him into poverty. I don't want to force a sale of his home through divorce but I refuse to put MY inheritance in jeopardy as it is MY roof over MY head.

And I am so desperately unhappy and have been for 16 of the 17 years, but I can hold it together 2 more for my kid. But, I want out. I just want to live alone and just...be happy and not annoyed by a man.

 

[adjusterjack]

I read that I could be responsible for the home if my husband defaults.

That's true, if you are both on the mortgage.

He will default. So in order to be sure when he defaults that the bank cannot come after me, is divorce my only option?

A divorce won't eliminate your obligation as long as you are on the loan, even way after divorce. The loan would have to be refinanced into his name only.

Honestly I wish he could keep it. I hate the home. He wants it. But the upkeep the HOA expenses, the utilities, it is not doable with me gone, and he really refuses to accept it.

The best option is to sell the house now, split the proceeds into separate accounts, and rent until you are divorced.

A divorce may force a sale of it anyway, so my idea is to talk him into down sizing and selling so he has more discretionary income, and we don't have to fully divorce. This is a 250K home, with a LOT of equity, there are plenty of nice homes one can down size to, so I am not asking to run him into poverty. I don't want to force a sale of his home through divorce but I refuse to put MY inheritance in jeopardy as it is MY roof over MY head.

You're very naive if you think that this will go ONLY the way YOU want it.

With divorce comes sacrifices and compromises. If the two of you can't come to an agreement, you'll make a pair of lawyers very happy as they deposit lots of your money into their bank accounts.

 

[zddoodah]

if we separate legally but not divorce (so i can continue to get some benefits - we both want that), I read that I could be responsible for the home if my husband defaults.

Responsible in what regard? If there's a mortgage, and assuming you're obligated on the mortgage, that obligation will continue regardless of whether you live in the home. And, as long as you own the home, you'll be obligated for property taxes, HOA fees, etc.

So in order to be sure when he defaults that the bank cannot come after me, is divorce my only option?

A divorce will have zero impact on your obligation under the mortgage.

we don't have to fully divorce.

Huh? You're either married or you're divorced. There is no such thing as a divorce that isn't a "full divorce."

I suggest that you confer with a local divorce attorney.

 

[Just Blue]

px hx

 

[Bluefavorite]

Responsible in what regard? If there's a mortgage, and assuming you're obligated on the mortgage, that obligation will continue regardless of whether you live in the home. And, as long as you own the home, you'll be obligated for property taxes, HOA fees, etc.




A divorce will have zero impact on your obligation under the mortgage.




Huh? You're either married or you're divorced. There is no such thing as a divorce that isn't a "full divorce."

I suggest that you confer with a local divorce attorney.

Omg I have talked to a lawyer. There is a legal separation and I get to keep insurance. It is not a full divorce.

Anyway he does not want to rent, it is beneath him. So, I guess I will meet with an attorney and see if we can do a legal separation and have me sign over all my rights legally to the house because I don't care if it falls down. I just do NOT want to be responsible for it, ever.

I will get most of what I want, the attorney said.he can get the court to make him pay for my legal fees and alimony if we get a full divorce.

I like saying full divorce as I know darn well you cam be legally separated and it is not a divorce.

Well they will have to force him to sell it because he will NOT sell it until I leave and only if he has to. idc how much money the lawyers charge. People get them all the time, they do just fine with attorney fees and oh yes, I can find one way or another to NOT be legally responsible for this home if I divorce or separate.

 

[Bluefavorite]

I am the one who gets a free home. It already goes my way.

I just do NOT want to be on the mortgage for this home. Period. End of story.

 

[AlmostThere]

I am the one who gets a free home. It already goes my way.

I just do NOT want to be on the mortgage for this home. Period. End of story.

If you are currently on the mortgage, the only way you will not be responsible for that mortgage is to sell it or have it refinanced out of your name. Being married, divorced, or separated will not change this. Signing the house over to your husband does not change the mortgage. If your lawyer is telling you otherwise, you need a new lawyer.

What do you think being legally separated will do for you?

 

[adjusterjack]

I just do NOT want to be on the mortgage for this home. Period. End of story.

Then don't sign over your rights to the home. Because you will still be on the mortgage without the benefit of ownership. The only way off the mortgage is to have your husband refinance it in his own name. Which is unlikely because you've already said he can't afford it on his own.

You also said it has a lot of equity. You shouldn't be willing to give up your share of that. You may have to force the sale of the home during your separation or divorce and leave him to his own devices for lodging.

You aren't likely to get alimony (no matter what the lawyer says), probably child support until your kid is 18.

If you are employed and can support yourself you aren't likely to get your husband to pay your lawyer fees either.

Be careful about the pie-in-the-sky promises that some divorce lawyers will make.