Worrying Dad...:(

[bcbk93]

What is the name of your state? Illinois I am divorced dad who is very scared for mychildrens safety.....i was divorced in 2001...stupid me didnt show up....so mom was awarded full custody....she then moved out of the home in 2001...i CONTINUED TO RAISE THE KIDS...not her...she rarely came to see them....usually trying to argue with me..not paying attention to them......she came to see them on the 18th of may...told me she was going to spend time with them...then never brought them back...took me 4 months to find the kids and get a temporary visitation schedule.....the mom and her new husband did a MASSIVE brainwashing of the kids.....the loving ,caring, 3 beautiful children i have dedicated my life to making #1,......didnt even act like they new me!!!!!!!LIKE ZOMBIES!!!!! Totally not like they were....but after about an hour or 2...they slowly started to go back to how i knew them......and i didnt want to question them...but slowly they started telling me things about the stepdad and mom....stepdad totally bashing me ...saying im a crackhead, ect..ect**************telling my kids to call him "POPS"...(what an insult...considering he helped my ex to hide and brainwash)...my son says that they leave him and his sister (ages 9 and 7) at home alone for hours...there is NO home phone!!!!!And NOT A good neighborhood by far!!!! Iam so flipping scared for the kids.....my nerves are completley shot...my son also told me mom said "when the custody battle is over she will change all the kids last names.....can anyone help me ? Im just so frazzled....i have her in court for modification of custody but the bias is getting ridiculous...the guardian ad litem reported her brainwashing but then still leaned toward the mom...

 

[CJane]

my son says that they leave him and his sister (ages 9 and 7) at home alone for hours...there is NO home phone!!!!!

That's plenty old enough to be home alone together for several hours ... at least according to CPS in my area.

And NOT A good neighborhood by far!!!!

That's rather subjective.

Iam so flipping scared for the kids

If you're truly scared for their physical safety, call CPS/the GAL.

my nerves are completley shot...my son also told me mom said "when the custody battle is over she will change all the kids last names.....can anyone help me ?

Do you have an attorney? You said there's a GAL involved... is he/she interviewing the children? Are you keeping in contact with him/her?

Im just so frazzled....i have her in court for modification of custody but the bias is getting ridiculous...the guardian ad litem reported her brainwashing but then still leaned toward the mom...

Leaning towards the other side doesn't always indicate bias. The totality of the picture has to be taken into account. Sometimes, even a faulty parent is the better choice.

Really, if there is a GAL involved and an attorney involved and the case is pending... we can help, but advice from us when we only have your words to go by, could also be detrimental.

 

[srhmkp]

What is the name of your state? Illinois I am divorced dad who is very scared for mychildrens safety.....i was divorced in 2001...stupid me didnt show up....so mom was awarded full custody....she then moved out of the home in 2001...i CONTINUED TO RAISE THE KIDS...not her...she rarely came to see them....usually trying to argue with me..not paying attention to them......she came to see them on the 18th of may...told me she was going to spend time with them...then never brought them back...took me 4 months to find the kids and get a temporary visitation schedule.....the mom and her new husband did a MASSIVE brainwashing of the kids.....the loving ,caring, 3 beautiful children i have dedicated my life to making #1,......didnt even act like they new me!!!!!!!LIKE ZOMBIES!!!!! Totally not like they were....but after about an hour or 2...they slowly started to go back to how i knew them......and i didnt want to question them...but slowly they started telling me things about the stepdad and mom....stepdad totally bashing me ...saying im a crackhead, ect..ect**************telling my kids to call him "POPS"...(what an insult...considering he helped my ex to hide and brainwash)...my son says that they leave him and his sister (ages 9 and 7) at home alone for hours...there is NO home phone!!!!!And NOT A good neighborhood by far!!!! Iam so flipping scared for the kids.....my nerves are completley shot...my son also told me mom said "when the custody battle is over she will change all the kids last names.....can anyone help me ? Im just so frazzled....i have her in court for modification of custody but the bias is getting ridiculous...the guardian ad litem reported her brainwashing but then still leaned toward the mom...

according to what i know a child has to be at least 12 years old to stay home alone and im not sure about watching a kid younger at the same time but it doesnt sound like a good thing too many things could happen to young kids at home.

 

[CJane]

according to what i know a child has to be at least 12 years old to stay home alone

Not true. Not by a long shot.

and im not sure about watching a kid younger at the same time but it doesnt sound like a good thing too many things could happen to young kids at home.

True, but legally irrelevant.

My kids are 10, 7 and almost 2. I WAS investigated by CPS thanks to my Ex. I was told by the CPS investigator after he interviewed my children that they are plenty old enough and mature enough to stay home for up to 6 hours w/ the baby and 8 if he's at the sitter.

 

[bcbk93]

Gal

There is a GAL...and she is pretty worthless....never returns my phone calls...she is as bad as the judge...who didnt even do anything to her taking them out of state without telling me,then hiding them and cutting off all communication!!Since i am the one acting as my own lawyer..i even recited the statute that forbids that...and all she got was"dont do that again"....gee...real nice....stupid me for thinking a judge is there to uphold those laws......he has plenty of proof yet still wont do his JOB!!!!Common sense tells you a 9 and 7 year old should NOT be left alone....regardless of maturity....Especially with no telephone....even WITH ONE....if some degenerate broke in...you tell me how my kids would fare defending themselves....they would be screwed and anyone knows that.

 

[CJane]

You NEED an attorney.

Mom wasn't 'in trouble' because Mom had COURT ORDERED FULL CUSTODY.

If you never changed that, even though the kids were living with you, that's not HER fault and the court isn't going to DO anything to HER for YOUR mistake.

And you just won't win on the being home alone thing. Especially in Belleville IL... there just aren't all that many psychos running around out there. I know that for a fact. I also know for a fact that CPS in that county is NOT going to care that kids that age are alone for a few hours.

Also, if you communicate in court the way you've communicated on here, you're toast.

 

[bcbk93]

?????

The kids arent in Belleville IL....they are in overland missouri....and not a good area i might add....there were 2 attempted child abductions in that neighborhood last weekend....scary stuff....i am trying to get an attorney...but am having no luck..the legal help centers arent any help **************please help me in correcting how i present things.....I dont want to be "Toast"......

 

[CJane]

The kids arent in Belleville IL....they are in overland missouri....and not a good area i might add....there were 2 attempted child abductions in that neighborhood last weekend....scary stuff....i am trying to get an attorney...but am having no luck..the legal help centers arent any help **************please help me in correcting how i present things.....I dont want to be "Toast"......

So, the court orders are from IL?

Let me explain to you that Mom currently has custody. That is mostly due to the fact that apparently for YEARS you didn't go to court to change anything when YOU HAD THE KIDS.

You need to get your fear/anger under control. It's not going to help YOU to yell at ME.

Leaving the children home alone is a parenting decision. If you really feel that the kids are in danger, you call CPS in Mom's county. But I'm telling you, unless the kids are thought to be in extreme danger, CPS isn't going to find anything wrong with some time spent home alone. I know this from my own personal experience w/Missouri DSS.

Seriously. Call the hotline first thing in the morning 1-800-392-3738.

Until I know where your orders are from, I can't help you anymore than that.

 

[bcbk93]

Orders

Sorry i didnt note which state...the orders are from illinois.