Texas :
My husband has custody of his 3 sons. CPS was involved because their mother was on and off of drugs, was being arrested, and there were allegations of abuse. After 5 years of legal fighting,( the children were placed with us during this time) she on a whim decided she didnt want them and gave up custody one day in court. In those 5 years she never tested positive for drugs ( people are given a week notice of drug tests), and rarely went to CPS supervised visits to see her kids.
That was 4 years ago. She has called twice to speak to the children. She sees them twice a year on Christmas and in February. The maternal grandparents see them once a year during the summer. They all live within 5 miles of us. During visits the kids tell us that she does drugs with them in the car while driving around, that they leave drugs laying around on the floor and in the beds. You get the idea. They havent had a visit since then, and it hasnt been an issue because she hasnt asked to see them. She lived in a motel because she cannot hold down a job, and last month moved to Hawaii.
SO. My husband and I are revising our wills, and we are adding onto our life insurance policies and wondered- If he died what would happen to the kids? We are very middle class and our home is in his name, not mine. His policy and all property will go to me. Is it worth it to try and terminate her parental rights so that she doesnt try to take these kids? We strongly feel that she would want them to get any money she could from his life insurance, and then drop them off at my door when the cash ran out. I do not have a problem with adopting his kids, I have been 'mom' for over 9 years, and I do know all of the legal responsibility that would come with this in the case of divorce. Our main concern in the safety of the children if she were to ever get custody again.
So my question is, is it worth it? Do we have a strong case for abandonment, will a court terminate based on here rarely seeing them and not paying child support at all? There is no way we can prove drug use, and we cant really prove that she hasnt come to see the children, can we? She will fight it tooth and nail but she has no money for a lawyer. My husband works out of town mon-fri, so I am raising these kids on my own a great deal of the time. It is not easy for me to raise them when I have no legal rights. I cant even sign some of the school paper work, it would be massively convenient to be able to send these kids on field trips or give permission for medical treatments. Any advice is appreciated.
My husband has custody of his 3 sons. CPS was involved because their mother was on and off of drugs, was being arrested, and there were allegations of abuse. After 5 years of legal fighting,( the children were placed with us during this time) she on a whim decided she didnt want them and gave up custody one day in court. In those 5 years she never tested positive for drugs ( people are given a week notice of drug tests), and rarely went to CPS supervised visits to see her kids.
That was 4 years ago. She has called twice to speak to the children. She sees them twice a year on Christmas and in February. The maternal grandparents see them once a year during the summer. They all live within 5 miles of us. During visits the kids tell us that she does drugs with them in the car while driving around, that they leave drugs laying around on the floor and in the beds. You get the idea. They havent had a visit since then, and it hasnt been an issue because she hasnt asked to see them. She lived in a motel because she cannot hold down a job, and last month moved to Hawaii.
SO. My husband and I are revising our wills, and we are adding onto our life insurance policies and wondered- If he died what would happen to the kids? We are very middle class and our home is in his name, not mine. His policy and all property will go to me. Is it worth it to try and terminate her parental rights so that she doesnt try to take these kids? We strongly feel that she would want them to get any money she could from his life insurance, and then drop them off at my door when the cash ran out. I do not have a problem with adopting his kids, I have been 'mom' for over 9 years, and I do know all of the legal responsibility that would come with this in the case of divorce. Our main concern in the safety of the children if she were to ever get custody again.
So my question is, is it worth it? Do we have a strong case for abandonment, will a court terminate based on here rarely seeing them and not paying child support at all? There is no way we can prove drug use, and we cant really prove that she hasnt come to see the children, can we? She will fight it tooth and nail but she has no money for a lawyer. My husband works out of town mon-fri, so I am raising these kids on my own a great deal of the time. It is not easy for me to raise them when I have no legal rights. I cant even sign some of the school paper work, it would be massively convenient to be able to send these kids on field trips or give permission for medical treatments. Any advice is appreciated.