Child Support across state lines

[blacklove]

What is the name of your state? Maryland - non custodial parent - VA

1 - Child's father and I worked out a child support agreement slightly (200 per month) below the MD guidelines. Combined income for both parents is 16,000 per month. As he was doing extras, and helping his older children with college, I didn't see the point in fighting for an extra 50 per week. Before we got to that point (1/25/07 after many months of negotiating) I filed a petition for child support in MD Court(1/05/07). After we reached our agreement, I abandoned the petition.

2- MD Court sends notice to each of us (6/07) stating if no action is taken, case will be closed. He is furious and immediately reduces support payments by 400 per month.

3- I filed a new petition in MD (7/12), he was served 8/12 and has 60 days to respond. He will probably wait until that time. Going through support enforcement and URISA, this could take close to a year to get resolved, but expenses continue for child. Now, he's doing nothing.

4. Contacted VA courts to find out if I can file directly in VA myself, (support enforcement agencies are not doing much that I cannot do on my own) in the interest of getting this resolved quickly. Northern VA court says it can be done, Southern VA court worker says no. He is legally a resident of VA, but works in MD. I am willing to take the 2 hour ride to VA for all court appearances. I and the child reside in MD.

Any information is appreciated.What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

which state has jurisdiction over custody and support?

 

[blacklove]

Maryland has jurisdication over custody and support, but the six figure earning non custodial parent has legal residence in VA, but earns wages in MD.

 

[LdiJ]

What I don't understand is why he got mad that you abandoned your petition?

 

[haiku]

I also think there needs to be some clarification on point 2**************.....

 

[blacklove]

What I don't understand is why he got mad that you abandoned your petition?

Besides being a complete arrogant fool, he is under the impression that I should be "happy" to work with him without the courts. His dealings with other women have been mostly non-progressive women from third world countries that would consider $100 per month a decent amount of child support. While that may be the case in a third world country, in the Washington, DC area, for someone that makes in excess of $140,000, that is not reflective of a decent quality of life for a child.

 

[blacklove]

I also think there needs to be some clarification on point 2**************.....

The point of filing a petition with the MD courts was to get the increase I knew my child needed as was entitled to receive. After we agreed on the increase, I should have followed up with the MD Courts to formally close the case. I could kick myself for not following through because we would be close to finished by now.

Anyone know where I can find documentation to send to him stating just because we are going to have a court date soon does not excuse him from paying child support now?

 

[CJane]

Anyone know where I can find documentation to send to him stating just because we are going to have a court date soon does not excuse him from paying child support now?

Actually, without a court order in place, he IS excused legally from paying child support now. Was your agreement filed with the courts?

Ask for back support to be assessed when in court.

 

[blacklove]

Actually, without a court order in place, he IS excused legally from paying child support now. Was your agreement filed with the courts?

Ask for back support to be assessed when in court.

No our agreement was not filed with the courts. Hmmmmmmm......if I really wanted to be a nasty witch, the monies he provided in July, 07 (when I refiled) and August, 07, I could consider it a gift and have the judge award whatever amount retroactive to the date of filing? I'm not out to do that though, I just want this resolved, and go on with some peace.

 

[blacklove]

Actually, without a court order in place, he IS excused legally from paying child support now. Was your agreement filed with the courts?

Ask for back support to be assessed when in court.

How can a parent be excused legally from supporting their child? Isn't that equivalent of child abuse? There isn't a court order that requires a custodial parent to care for child (not that I would need one to be responsible), but if I did not provide the basics, I could be charged with child abuse and neglect.

 

[CallMeMack]

i'm curious how you worked out your "agreement" and presented it to the courts for it to be official ?? (i'm kinda in the same boat). thanks for your reply (and sorry i couldn't offer you any advice as i'm seeking some of my own.)

 

[blacklove]

i'm curious how you worked out your "agreement" and presented it to the courts for it to be official ?? (i'm kinda in the same boat). thanks for your reply (and sorry i couldn't offer you any advice as i'm seeking some of my own.)

We never presented an agreement to the court. At that time we were both acting like responsible adults with our child being the primary focus. He has so many issues that are preventing him from seeing the big picture at this point. Some states offer mediation and then you can have the agreement reviewed by a master or a judge. I should have insisted we followed through with this procedure, if I'd done so this post wouldn't be necessary, and my checking account wouldn't be almost on e with more than half the month left.

 

[CJane]

How can a parent be excused legally from supporting their child? Isn't that equivalent of child abuse? There isn't a court order that requires a custodial parent to care for child (not that I would need one to be responsible), but if I did not provide the basics, I could be charged with child abuse and neglect.

Without a court order for child support - especially in the case of unmarried parents - there is no obligation on the part of the NCP to provide monetary support to the child.

The CP can file for back support at the same time that support is filed for, and depending on statutes it can be awarded. Generally that will increase the supoort payment by 10% or so each month with a portion going towards arrears and the rest towards currently owed.

But yeah, no order, no obligation. He would be a fool to be paying you without an order as anything he'd paid you up to the time of the order would likely be considered a gift, not CS.

 

[blacklove]

Wow! There is a small portion of me that really wants to consider the money he's been giving me since we seperated more than a year ago a gift. In my heart I know it's not the right thing to do, but I'm so angry now - he's provided nothing for September, when expenses have increased - back to school stuff, enrollment fees for childcare, extracirricular activities, etc. I'm going to take the high road and do the right thing though, I gotta live with myself in the end.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

My first husband used to pay me $200 in CASH every other week when he got paid. I KNEW he paid; he KNEW he paid. I would NEVER have considered it anything else. I could sleep at night knowing that I did the right thing. I would tell the court how much you received. You will look much better in the eyes of the court.