I need help please

[thebobot]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Please im in need of some serious help , i left my abusive ex wife in september of last year and we began divorce proceedings , I then started seeing someone new and she harassed and stalked us both untill she drove this new woman out of my life . I was abused insulted and had items stolen when i went to pick up our child. I have since completely removed myself from the situation and simply want this woman out of my life for good

I began seeing someone new recently and she has just contacted her , bad mouthin me , insulting me and attempting to drive this new woman out of my life. I have attempted a restraining order when this began with the last woman and it was refused. My soon to be ex wife calls my job contacts my family , emails me constantly with insults or threats of court ....I cant take this anymore and i feel i have no legal means to stop this....

please i need help, im constantly in a state of panic and she has a private investigator following me now , i have called the police and they do nothing , I have tried the courts and nothing has happened....WHAT DO I DO!?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Please im in need of some serious help , i left my abusive ex wife in september of last year and we began divorce proceedings , I then started seeing someone new and she harassed and stalked us both untill she drove this new woman out of my life . I was abused insulted and had items stolen when i went to pick up our child. I have since completely removed myself from the situation and simply want this woman out of my life for good

I began seeing someone new recently and she has just contacted her , bad mouthin me , insulting me and attempting to drive this new woman out of my life. I have attempted a restraining order when this began with the last woman and it was refused. My soon to be ex wife calls my job contacts my family , emails me constantly with insults or threats of court ....I cant take this anymore and i feel i have no legal means to stop this....

please i need help, im constantly in a state of panic and she has a private investigator following me now , i have called the police and they do nothing , I have tried the courts and nothing has happened....WHAT DO I DO!?

Your girlfriend is the person who needs to convince a court that a restraining order is appropriate. To be honest, what's happening between you personally and your still-wife is very, very common during the divorce process.

 

[Ohiogal]

If you have a child with this woman, you are never going to have her permanently out of your life UNLESS you are going to forego a relationship with your child.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Please im in need of some serious help , i left my abusive ex wife in september of last year and we began divorce proceedings , I then started seeing someone new and she harassed and stalked us both untill she drove this new woman out of my life . I was abused insulted and had items stolen when i went to pick up our child. I have since completely removed myself from the situation and simply want this woman out of my life for good

I began seeing someone new recently and she has just contacted her , bad mouthin me , insulting me and attempting to drive this new woman out of my life. I have attempted a restraining order when this began with the last woman and it was refused. My soon to be ex wife calls my job contacts my family , emails me constantly with insults or threats of court ....I cant take this anymore and i feel i have no legal means to stop this....

please i need help, im constantly in a state of panic and she has a private investigator following me now , i have called the police and they do nothing , I have tried the courts and nothing has happened....WHAT DO I DO!?

Stop dating until your divorce is final.

 

[stealth2]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Please im in need of some serious help , i left my abusive ex wife in september of last year and we began divorce proceedings , I then started seeing someone new and she harassed and stalked us both untill she drove this new woman out of my life . I was abused insulted and had items stolen when i went to pick up our child. I have since completely removed myself from the situation and simply want this woman out of my life for good

I began seeing someone new recently and she has just contacted her , bad mouthin me , insulting me and attempting to drive this new woman out of my life. I have attempted a restraining order when this began with the last woman and it was refused. My soon to be ex wife calls my job contacts my family , emails me constantly with insults or threats of court ....I cant take this anymore and i feel i have no legal means to stop this....

please i need help, im constantly in a state of panic and she has a private investigator following me now , i have called the police and they do nothing , I have tried the courts and nothing has happened....WHAT DO I DO!?

And you see your child... when?

 

[thebobot]

And you see your child... when?

I have not seen my child in 3 weeks, getting chased down the freeway by a lunatic while my son was in the car with me who subsequently stole my car seat and filed a false police report about me driving on a suspended license did the job. I realize how this sounds but after a year of that behavior my own mental health has suffered. The police or courts wont do anything about it even when given overwhelming evidence of her psychotic behavior and its not in my or my sons best interest for me to continue trying to be a father to him while this is the response from the mother.

I have sent her and her lawyer a cease and desist letter, I sent it via email asking for this behavior to stop and for her not to contact me, my job , my friends or my family in an attempt to destroy my character, to cause me stress or to obtain or divulge information that is designed to harm me. I sent this via email , do I need to send it by mail?

I dont think anyone has the right to tell me or insist i am not allowed to see a member of the opposite sex simply because my ex is crazy , the reason for the breakdown of the relationship was diue to harassment and control, its what i wanted to get away from., me simply giving in an allowing it to continue to dictate my life is her continuing the abuse.

 

[Ladyback1]

I dont think anyone has the right to tell me or insist i am not allowed to see a member of the opposite sex simply because my ex is crazy , the reason for the breakdown of the relationship was diue to harassment and control, its what i wanted to get away from., me simply giving in an allowing it to continue to dictate my life is her continuing the abuse.

Unfortunately? You are STILL married!
Get an attorney and finish up the divorce before you start any sort of relationship with someone else.

Your mental health? What about the mental health of your child? For all intent and purpose you have abandoned your child. How do you think the child feels?

If you behave morally (no dating until divorce is final) then your soon to be ex will have one less thing to stress you over.
Get over yourself. Grow a set. Pull on your big boy panties and deal with it, instead of whining about it!

 

[Ohiogal]

I have not seen my child in 3 weeks, getting chased down the freeway by a lunatic while my son was in the car with me who subsequently stole my car seat and filed a false police report about me driving on a suspended license did the job. I realize how this sounds but after a year of that behavior my own mental health has suffered. The police or courts wont do anything about it even when given overwhelming evidence of her psychotic behavior and its not in my or my sons best interest for me to continue trying to be a father to him while this is the response from the mother.

I have sent her and her lawyer a cease and desist letter, I sent it via email asking for this behavior to stop and for her not to contact me, my job , my friends or my family in an attempt to destroy my character, to cause me stress or to obtain or divulge information that is designed to harm me. I sent this via email , do I need to send it by mail?

I dont think anyone has the right to tell me or insist i am not allowed to see a member of the opposite sex simply because my ex is crazy , the reason for the breakdown of the relationship was diue to harassment and control, its what i wanted to get away from., me simply giving in an allowing it to continue to dictate my life is her continuing the abuse.

She is not your ex and YOU are committing adultery. The court can forbid you from exposing your child to this mess and your adulterous paramour. Go to court and get court orders regarding a neutral exchange point.

 

[stealth2]

I have not seen my child in 3 weeks, getting chased down the freeway by a lunatic while my son was in the car with me who subsequently stole my car seat and filed a false police report about me driving on a suspended license did the job. I realize how this sounds but after a year of that behavior my own mental health has suffered. The police or courts wont do anything about it even when given overwhelming evidence of her psychotic behavior and its not in my or my sons best interest for me to continue trying to be a father to him while this is the response from the mother.

I have sent her and her lawyer a cease and desist letter, I sent it via email asking for this behavior to stop and for her not to contact me, my job , my friends or my family in an attempt to destroy my character, to cause me stress or to obtain or divulge information that is designed to harm me. I sent this via email , do I need to send it by mail?

I dont think anyone has the right to tell me or insist i am not allowed to see a member of the opposite sex simply because my ex is crazy , the reason for the breakdown of the relationship was diue to harassment and control, its what i wanted to get away from., me simply giving in an allowing it to continue to dictate my life is her continuing the abuse.

However, you apparently feel it fine to leave a small and vulnerable child with this "crazy" and "abusive" and "psychotic" person.

In all seriousness, don't you think it would be more important to be there for your child at this point in time? Plenty of time to enjoy female company once your divorce is finished.

 

[Ohiogal]

However, you apparently feel it fine to leave a small and vulnerable child with this "crazy" and "abusive" and "psychotic" person.

In all seriousness, don't you think it would be more important to be there for your child at this point in time? Plenty of time to enjoy female company once your divorce is finished.

And if needs such relaxation, he could try masturbation. Hence getting his needs met while still not engaging in adultery.

And yeah, ain't it grand that he leaves a child with a crazy, abusive, psychotic person. Though what evidence does he have of any of it and who diagnosed her as psychotic?

 

[anearthw]

What exactly is her character assassination? That you are dating while married? That you don't see your kid? That you are spending marital funds on other women? Sounds like you are doing a mighty fine job of that yourself.

Dear Court, my wife is not nice to my girlfriend. Make her stop. Oh, dear.

 

[thebobot]

Right clearly not many ppl here have dealt with an abusive controlling sociopath before who screams profanity and does everything in their power to use a child as a weapon. I have attempted to have the child removed from her care and sunk over 15 thousand dollars into fighting a losing battle. Whether you legal experts wish to believe it or not the US legal system is extremely broken in this regard. She constantly puts the child in danger and attacks me at every visitation. I am legally separated and the court has done NOTHING in regards to her insane behavior.

I have done everything legally I can but as explained the courts and authorities do nothing. If the tables were turned I would of been arrested a dozen times over... the sheriffs department admitted this to my face.

I have exhausted every legal avenue in relation to my son and as stated have for the time being removed myself from the situation in the hopes that her behavior stops.

I am on here to seek advice so I can protect myself from a stalker and someone who wishes to destroy every aspect of my life when the courts simply allow behavior that would land a man in jail but turn a blind eye as its a woman doing it.

The argument that ohh put your big boy pants on is the exact mentality that allows this kind of situation and allows it to continue. .. I have been under attack , stalked , threatened and harassed for over a year and I'm afraid I can no longer take it... many men in my position would simply leave the country.. I do however wish to be a part of my sons life.

Simply because you are married to someone does not give them or anyone the right to make your life a living nightmare for so long.... again if I was a woman things would be rather different.

You seem to misunderstand my meaninng here

MY WORK IS CALLED ON A REGULAR BASIS
MY FAMILY IS CONTACTED CONSTANTLY
I RECEIVE 100s OF UNWANTED EMAILS AND TXTS
WHEN I ATTEMPT TO MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE SHE ATTEMPTS TO DESTROY IT

 

[Proserpina]

Right clearly not many ppl here have dealt with an abusive controlling sociopath before who screams profanity and does everything in their power to use a child as a weapon. I have attempted to have the child removed from her care and sunk over 15 thousand dollars into fighting a losing battle. Whether you legal experts wish to believe it or not the US legal system is extremely broken in this regard. She constantly puts the child in danger and attacks me at every visitation. I am legally separated and the court has done NOTHING in regards to her insane behavior.

I have done everything legally I can but as explained the courts and authorities do nothing. If the tables were turned I would of been arrested a dozen times over... the sheriffs department admitted this to my face.

I have exhausted every legal avenue in relation to my son and as stated have for the time being removed myself from the situation in the hopes that her behavior stops.

I am on here to seek advice so I can protect myself from a stalker and someone who wishes to destroy every aspect of my life when the courts simply allow behavior that would land a man in jail but turn a blind eye as its a woman doing it.

The argument that ohh put your big boy pants on is the exact mentality that allows this kind of situation and allows it to continue. .. I have been under attack , stalked , threatened and harassed for over a year and I'm afraid I can no longer take it... many men in my position would simply leave the country.. I do however wish to be a part of my sons life.

Simply because you are married to someone does not give them or anyone the right to make your life a living nightmare for so long.... again if I was a woman things would be rather different.

Oh please.

Many men would leave the country, eh? Because it's just SO easy to get permission to live in another country, isn't it?

What kind of fake planet are you on?

 

[LdiJ]

Right clearly not many ppl here have dealt with an abusive controlling sociopath before who screams profanity and does everything in their power to use a child as a weapon. I have attempted to have the child removed from her care and sunk over 15 thousand dollars into fighting a losing battle. Whether you legal experts wish to believe it or not the US legal system is extremely broken in this regard. She constantly puts the child in danger and attacks me at every visitation. I am legally separated and the court has done NOTHING in regards to her insane behavior.

I have done everything legally I can but as explained the courts and authorities do nothing. If the tables were turned I would of been arrested a dozen times over... the sheriffs department admitted this to my face.

I have exhausted every legal avenue in relation to my son and as stated have for the time being removed myself from the situation in the hopes that her behavior stops.

I am on here to seek advice so I can protect myself from a stalker and someone who wishes to destroy every aspect of my life when the courts simply allow behavior that would land a man in jail but turn a blind eye as its a woman doing it.

The argument that ohh put your big boy pants on is the exact mentality that allows this kind of situation and allows it to continue. .. I have been under attack , stalked , threatened and harassed for over a year and I'm afraid I can no longer take it... many men in my position would simply leave the country.. I do however wish to be a part of my sons life.

Simply because you are married to someone does not give them or anyone the right to make your life a living nightmare for so long.... again if I was a woman things would be rather different.

You seem to misunderstand my meaninng here

MY WORK IS CALLED ON A REGULAR BASIS
MY FAMILY IS CONTACTED CONSTANTLY
I RECEIVE 100s OF UNWANTED EMAILS AND TXTS
WHEN I ATTEMPT TO MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE SHE ATTEMPTS TO DESTROY IT

Believe me dad...not only have we seen the kinds of things that you are dealing with, but we have seen FAR worse.

One of the worst things that someone can do when they are doing through a contentious divorce is to openly date other people during the process. It simply raises the "drama" to a whole new level and drags the divorce out. Whether you mentally understand it or not the act of separating or filing for divorce does not mean that you are "broken up" and are free to date other people. That freedom comes with a final decree of divorce.

By dating other people you are rubbing the whole thing in your wife's face. If she is at all the angry type its likely to send her off the deep end. Even the most calm people have a hard time dealing with that because it is such a slap in the face.

Again, the very best advice that I can give you is to stop dating until your divorce is final.

 

[Proserpina]

Incidentally, OP, there is virtually nothing you personally can do about your wife contacting your family. She is free to do that. A C&D from you is worthless.

(Now if those family members believe she's crossed the line into harassment, that's a different matter - THEY can take legal action)