I am so new with all of this. I'm sorry if I seem like I don't know what I'm talking about.. because I really don't.
FOC said I could do two things. Hire a lawyer or file a motion within the court. I had them send me the papers for filing a motion... but I came here too since I'm just so confused.
Yes. We got a CS order. He's $1,000 behind and even though he lost his job, he cashed out his 401k so he could easily give a little bit to his son. I know this is doesn't matter but I'm freaking out with electricity and heat bills right now. I completely agree with you with the emotional support. I don't expect any from him and I'm ok with it. It's just all really new and seeing how he lives such a carefree life while I'm trying to keep everything together for our son is just going to take time.
No. He didn't call. He never calls. Our son will call him and he won't be home or answer his cell phone. My son just called again this morning... with no answer on both phones.
I know this doesn't matter either but our son has no interest in going to see his father right now. He says he's mean and smacks his face. I know kids can make things up though. I'm trying to push for him going today to see his father after reading everyones responses.
I'm wondering if a drug test would be possible. I did not want to go that route but he's driving our son around high. Would that be considered endangerment? This is an honest question. I'm not trying to be mean to my ex, I just want to know where the boundaries are.
It's ok to be new to this and not know anything. The important thing is to want to learn about all of this. Being uninformed and going from emotions can make a mess of your case.
In Michigan you can basically file a motion at anytime, makes no difference when the last order was made, you can file, the case will be heard. However just cause you can do that, does not mean you should. Filing when you don't have enough, is not going to get you in the favor of the court.
That carefree life he is living can go on until the child is 18. Do not ever expect him to do more then that. When your child becomes an adult, if dad has done nothing but live a carefree life, then your child will decide what the relationship with dad will be. Get your own support system, like family or friends, other single parents(believe it or not these other single parents can be men). You help each out.
If he is more then 2 months behind in CS, FOC or yourself can file a show cause in Michigan. It may though anger dad to push on that issue already, but sometimes you have to do it. It won't get him to pay CS on a regular basis, it will get you a bit of cash for the moment, as most likely they will make him pay x amount of what is owed or face penalities. x amount could be $50 bucks(I actually know a case first hand that, that is all they ever make dad pay). If your income is low and do not qualify for state assistance, there are many local organizations around that can help. Churches, charities, food banks. If your low income, it's not to hard to make the qualifications for food stamps, so make sure you check to see if you can qualify for state assistance.
Keep a log of when dad calls, if he takes his parenting time, why he does not. In Michigan all courts usually go by a 30 minute wait time, so say dad is to pick up at 6pm, you must have the child available till 6:30pm. If he is a no show, then call, leave a message, hey you were suppose to pick up at 6pm, you didn't show. Then log it, along with the time of the call, and the response from dad if you receive it. Understand that parenting time is a right for dad, but he does not have to use it. I have seen some Michigan courts though modify the parents time after a year of missing scheduled visits. It's rare though they ever take it away completely.
Nope it does not matter your son is required to go if dad wants his time. Your job and responsibility is to make that happen. This is an area that the courts in Michigan I am very familiar with take very serious. You encourage that child, you get him excited and if needed you must make him go. Making him go can require you to physically put the child in the car.
If you have proof of him driving around high with the child, it can be shown to the court. You do have the right if he showed up for pick up high, to refuse to send the child. However you will have to explain that to the court, best bet would be to call the police while he is there. It's a risk, often they leave before the police get there, no proof, and it can be hard to explain it to the court.