I have seen many patterns of violence in relationships where the real aggressor, usually husband or boyfriend, would provoke and provoke, maybe even pinch or poke or otherwise aggrivate the victim until they got some sort of response, such as a slap or hit, and then they took this as justification to really beat the heck out of the person. I certainly hope you are getting far, far away from the situation, where you will no longer be exposed to abusive language to such an extent that you lose it.
But any person, man or woman who gives someone a slap of any kind, which is NOT a disabling blow, does not work for self defense, and is VERY likely to provoke a physical response is being profoundly stupid. (This goes for slapping children, too.)
If he made you mad enough to decide to hurt him, for gosh sakes, either do it effectively enough to disable him or get away from him.(Preferred behavior) Don't slap. That's about guaranteed to get yourself retaliated against and maybe seriously hurt. I suspect maybe you wanted to? I might think that if I walked into this situation and you told me that.
I agree, when the other person in a confrontation chases you from room to room when you are trying to get away, it is probably a deliberate effort to get you to act violently. If someone does this to you, be forwarned. Don't do it to others. if someone is trying to get away from you, let them!
But since you are asking this after the fact, I gather that you did not call the police, because you were afraid you'd be the one jailed. As we said, nobody can tell you the answer to that now. But in the future, DON'T slap him upside the head two or three times, no matter what he says. Any fool with a mouth who can control your actions and behavior by something they say is winning.