14 year old boy chooses to live with his dad

[SINGLE DAD 1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?Massachusetts. So my boy of 14 wants to live with me. Why would the judge not allow that? Im his father, I live on the same school bus line. Is he old enough to choose ? He wants to live with me

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?Massachusetts. So my boy of 14 wants to live with me. Why would the judge not allow that? Im his father, I live on the same school bus line. Is he old enough to choose ? He wants to live with me

1. Because we don't allow our children to make such decisions.

2. No, he's not old enough to choose.


If there is a change of circumstance, at 14 his wishes would probably carry at least some weight in court.

So what has changed recently?

 

[stealth2]

Why did you think it necessary to start a new thread? You already have one going with this question, and we are waiting for a response - what is the change of circumstance?

 

[stealth2]

1. Because we don't allow our children to make such decisions.

2. No, he's not old enough to choose.


If there is a change of circumstance, at 14 his wishes would probably carry at least some weight in court.

So what has changed recently?

Pro - he has another thread, with pretty much the same question.

 

[cappadocia]

Why did you think it necessary to start a new thread? You already have one going with this question, and we are waiting for a response - what is the change of circumstance?

Perhaps if he asks again tomorrow, the answers will have changed.

 

[SINGLE DAD 1]

Why did you think it necessary to start a new thread? You already have one going with this question, and we are waiting for a response - what is the change of circumstance?

The change is in my sons heart only. He just does not want to live with his Mother any longer.They fight all the time. It causes him unnecessary stress. He needs to do better this year. He is smart and his school work is lacking

 

[Proserpina]

Oh jeez.

Okay, well maybe if he sees a gazillion people respond he'll actually check back and answer the question?

 

[Proserpina]

The change is in my sons heart only. He just does not want to live with his Mother any longer.They fight all the time. It causes him unnecessary stress. He needs to do better this year. He is smart and his school work is lacking

Lacking how? Why do you think he needs to do better?

 

[stealth2]

The change is in my sons heart only. He just does not want to live with his Mother any longer.They fight all the time. It causes him unnecessary stress. He needs to do better this year. He is smart and his school work is lacking

Yeah - not gonna cut it. He COULD do better if he applied himself. If he's not doing so, then it should be no surprise that his school work is lacking. That is on him.

Again - WHY did you need to start a new thread?

 

[SINGLE DAD 1]

Lacking how? Why do you think he needs to do better?

He is a smart boy and his grades do not show what he is capable of. I feel the stress his mom is giving him only prevents him. Mabey even to rebel toward her. not sure but he wants to do right by me it seems

 

[stealth2]

He is a smart boy and his grades do not show what he is capable of. I feel the stress his mom is giving him only prevents him. Mabey even to rebel toward her. not sure but he wants to do right by me it seems

Which only shows that he is not mature enough to make this decision.

And... you needed a new thread because.... ??? Yes - I AM going to keep asking you.

 

[CJane]

He is a smart boy and his grades do not show what he is capable of. I feel the stress his mom is giving him only prevents him. Mabey even to rebel toward her. not sure but he wants to do right by me it seems

1. Intelligence is not a guarantee against bad grades.
2. "Not sure, but it seems like..." isn't going to work in court.
3. None of that is a change in circumstances, which is required to change custody.
4. It's spelled maybe.

 

[SINGLE DAD 1]

Yeah - not gonna cut it. He COULD do better if he applied himself. If he's not doing so, then it should be no surprise that his school work is lacking. That is on him.

Again - WHY did you need to start a new thread?

I think a better and more positive atmosphere would help him. He is not happy with mom and rebels against her 24/7... new thread. not sure what im doing and i didnt know what coc ment. sorry

 

[stealth2]

I think a better and more positive atmosphere would help him. He is not happy with mom and rebels against her 24/7... new thread. not sure what im doing and i didnt know what coc ment. sorry

CoC = Change of Circumstance.

And no, not being happy with his Mom isn't one. As for the rebelling - time for you to man up and tell him, as a parent, that he needs to knock the bull puckies off and and start acting like a responsible young man - which includes applying himself at school. That you are not going to reward his slacking off.

 

[Isis1]

I think a better and more positive atmosphere would help him. He is not happy with mom and rebels against her 24/7... new thread. not sure what im doing and i didnt know what coc ment. sorry

COC means change of circumstance. You haven't mentioned one. You say he and mom fight all the time. I got an idea. Tell that child to stop disrespecting his mother. Stop enabling that little boy to disregard his mother. THAT IS YOUR JOB as a coparent. To not allow the child to pick sides. Ever. You are deliberately putting the child in a situation he should not be in.