Another Question

[Peanuts200788]

What is the name of your state? GA

Yesterday another call came in from my X's friend, also an old acquaintance of mine.

I know for a fact that these are calls trying to find out information because my ex has been told by me and the local sherriff's dept. not to contact me.

Isn't this an indirect form of harrassment? If it happens again, should I inform an officer so they can be told not to call my house?

 

[majomom1]

What is the name of your state? GA

Yesterday another call came in from my X's friend, also an old acquaintance of mine.

I know for a fact that these are calls trying to find out information because my ex has been told by me and the local sherriff's dept. not to contact me.

Isn't this an indirect form of harrassment? If it happens again, should I inform an officer so they can be told not to call my house?

How do you know... for a fact? Can you prove it? Did the caller say that your ex asked them to call you? Did they say "X wants to know blah, blah..." ???

Peanut... I think you are going overboard again. You can: 1) have a polite conversation and give them NO information; 2) Get caller ID and let all those calls go to voice mail; or 3)simply ask them NOT to call you.

 

[BL]

What is the name of your state? GA

Yesterday another call came in from my X's friend, also an old acquaintance of mine.

I know for a fact that these are calls trying to find out information because my ex has been told by me and the local sherriff's dept. not to contact me.

Isn't this an indirect form of harrassment? If it happens again, should I inform an officer so they can be told not to call my house?

Did you tell the old acquaintance not to call your home anymore ?

First you have to tell the person , unless there's a court order .

 

[Peanuts200788]

How do you know... for a fact? Can you prove it? Did the caller say that your ex asked them to call you? Did they say "X wants to know blah, blah..." ???

To answer your question...YES I have proof...I have an email from a friend saying that he asked her to call me....Specifically said, he asked her to call since he knew he couldnt call...

course then again, i guess thats classified as hearsay, right?

 

[majomom1]

To answer your question...YES I have proof...I have an email from a friend saying that he asked her to call me....Specifically said, he asked her to call since he knew he couldnt call...

course then again, i guess thats classified as hearsay, right?

An email could be used as proof... depends on the date of the email, the date she called etc. What else did she say in the email? What was she trying to find out?

Did you respond to that email? Did you tell her it was ok to call you?

Your question is way too broad and details here are important. If he just has random people calling to find out info about you... all you can really do is either not answer the call or not give them information.

Ask them not to call, for him, anymore. Change your phone number. Change your email.

 

[Ohiogal]

An email could be used as proof... depends on the date of the email, the date she called etc. What else did she say in the email? What was she trying to find out?

ONLY if the person who wrote said email is in court to testify about it. The email itself is hearsay.

Did you respond to that email? Did you tell her it was ok to call you?

Those are important facts.

Your question is way too broad and details here are important. If he just has random people calling to find out info about you... all you can really do is either not answer the call or not give them information.

Not necessarily. IF there is a restraining order then he has violated it by having third parties call. And if he has been told not to call her by the police or legal action would be taken, then he is still harrassing her.

 

[Peanuts200788]

Not necessarily. IF there is a restraining order then he has violated it by having third parties call. And if he has been told not to call her by the police or legal action would be taken, then he is still harrassing her.

To answer one queston: the email said specifically to call be bc he couldn't call and to plz find out if i'd had an abortion or not bc if I hadn't we would be going through a custody battle for the baby.

The next question: No I haven't been the one answering the phone calls...yesterday when the phone call came I wasn't home and my dad answered the phone...these people don't like my dad but I did tell him that you guys said that next time they call he needs to tell them NOT to call back.

Now to OG's question: Yes the police did call him and another girl whom he was friends with (and I was friends with her at one point...tho why i don't know) to STOP calling my parents, otherwise they could be arressted for harrassment.

the first day I found out I was pregnant and told my parents, of course they were a little upset but would never do anything to hurt me.

that night (this is why the police told them to stop calling) my parents took the phone off the hook because my X and this girl kept calling and calling....eventually the law shows up and apparently this girl has made not one but two calls saying she thinks my father has kicked me in the stomach and is holding me against my will.

Two officers came out, I assured them I was fine and this was not true and one officer said he would phone both her and my X and let them know if the calls were made again, charges would be filed.

This happened a few months ago, but my parents have been adamant about them not calling.

I didn't know if this story helped but i thought it may give you some more information to go on.

 

[LdiJ]

If there is a restraining order, you need to report him for violating it. If not, and the person calling was not him or the other girl that were previously warned not to contact you, then until you tell the person not to contact you again, its not harassment.

 

[majomom1]

To answer one queston: the email said specifically to call be bc he couldn't call and to plz find out if i'd had an abortion or not bc if I hadn't we would be going through a custody battle for the baby.

The next question: No I haven't been the one answering the phone calls...yesterday when the phone call came I wasn't home and my dad answered the phone...these people don't like my dad but I did tell him that you guys said that next time they call he needs to tell them NOT to call back.

Now to OG's question: Yes the police did call him and another girl whom he was friends with (and I was friends with her at one point...tho why i don't know) to STOP calling my parents, otherwise they could be arressted for harrassment.

the first day I found out I was pregnant and told my parents, of course they were a little upset but would never do anything to hurt me.

that night (this is why the police told them to stop calling) my parents took the phone off the hook because my X and this girl kept calling and calling....eventually the law shows up and apparently this girl has made not one but two calls saying she thinks my father has kicked me in the stomach and is holding me against my will.

Two officers came out, I assured them I was fine and this was not true and one officer said he would phone both her and my X and let them know if the calls were made again, charges would be filed.

This happened a few months ago, but my parents have been adamant about them not calling.

I didn't know if this story helped but i thought it may give you some more information to go on.

Peanut... you didn't answer the questions about the email. Did you respond or tell this person it was ok to call you?

Also... when did you receive the email? You are now talking about events from a few months ago, so it is hard to tell, but you will need to act on these within a reasonable amount of time. Keep those emails and subpeona them if you need to for court.

With a third party person may be harder to prove anything, especially if they are an acquaintance, or friend of yours. You just need to be very aware of anyone's motives for calling you. If you don't give any information out, then the calls will probably stop.

 

[CJane]

If not, and the person calling was not him or the other girl that were previously warned not to contact you, then until you tell the person not to contact you again, its not harassment.

OP should check statutes on this one as well.

In my state, harassment doesn't just have to be irritating, and it doesn't just have to occur after you've asked someone to stop... it also has to be a THREAT and it has to make you fearful for your life or safety.

Peanut? I'd totally tell them that you left because you're not sure the baby is his.

 

[Peanuts200788]

Peanut... you didn't answer the questions about the email. Did you respond or tell this person it was ok to call you?

Also... when did you receive the email? You are now talking about events from a few months ago, so it is hard to tell, but you will need to act on these within a reasonable amount of time. Keep those emails and subpeona them if you need to for court.

With a third party person may be harder to prove anything, especially if they are an acquaintance, or friend of yours. You just need to be very aware of anyone's motives for calling you. If you don't give any information out, then the calls will probably stop.

Sorry I wasn't more clear ... no i did not say that it was okay for these people to call...

This email was received about a month ago...

This acquaintance is someone I have not spoken to in about a year until now...

We have caller ID and my parents don't answer the phone if they don't know who it is...but should they answer it and if it is these people calling back, tell them NOT to call anymore or just let the answering machine get it and let them leave a message? Which would be better?

Again I thank you for all of your help...

 

[Peanuts200788]

OP should check statutes on this one as well.

In my state, harassment doesn't just have to be irritating, and it doesn't just have to occur after you've asked someone to stop... it also has to be a THREAT and it has to make you fearful for your life or safety.

Peanut? I'd totally tell them that you left because you're not sure the baby is his.

Cjane? If I were to do this, would it make things harder on me if he tried to take me to court? Could they try to make me out to be this promiscuious (however you spell that) girl and make me lose the baby even if the X doesn't get custody?

 

[CJane]

Cjane? If I were to do this, would it make things harder on me if he tried to take me to court? Could they try to make me out to be this promiscuious (however you spell that) girl and make me lose the baby even if the X doesn't get custody?

You have every right to be promiscuous. You also have every right to stop people from contacting you. Technically, he's NOT the father of this child until it's born and paternity is established.

So tell the next person that contacts you "He's not even the father". It's a true statement. And it doesn't imply that you're promiscuous at all.

 

[Peanuts200788]

You have every right to be promiscuous. You also have every right to stop people from contacting you. Technically, he's NOT the father of this child until it's born and paternity is established.

So tell the next person that contacts you "He's not even the father". It's a true statement. And it doesn't imply that you're promiscuous at all.

that's something I haven't thought about...thank you!!

and in order for him to prove that he is the father...that would take lawyers and money right?

 

[CJane]

that's something I haven't thought about...thank you!!

and in order for him to prove that he is the father...that would take lawyers and money right?

OR... you filing for CS/state assistance.

But that's down the road. If you think it'll end the contact and let you concentrate on getting the baby BORN, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

And ya know, I don't normally recommend that people lie to ANYONE about their children or potential children.... and this isn't strictly a lie. But it's more important to YOU and to the BABY that you stop worrying. If that'll help stop the worry, it's not something that's going to bite you later.